I feel that addiction is a sickness, that can take over someone with out them even realising until it is to late. I’m sure that most people did not set out to be come addicted to some anything. I think they made some not so great decisions that ended in something completely unexpected. It is something that is very hard to over come and most will struggle their entire life to either become clean or stay clean. A lot of people do not want these people around and feel that they will do all kinds of horrible things when they are on their drug of choice. Or that they are just not worthy of being around because they could just do like everyone else if they really wanted to or worried they may steal from them or bring the wrong people around. While yes some of this is true to a point we can’t just turn our backs on these people either. No i am not going to invite them to come hang out at my house around my kids high or to do their drugs in my home or have it around me or my children. But at the same time if they are trying to straighten up, get clean, change their ways, or whatever you want to call it then I am not going to shun them because of their past. No matter how resent it may or may not have been. Just because they stray and maybe use again along the way don’t make them a bad person or mean they are not trying. It just means they are human and like the rest of us they trip along the way.
I had a friend that I was trying to help years back. He was a friends son and even though I had known her for a long time I had not met him until much later. He didn’t live far but he wasn’t around much he worked and things had his own place already when we met. I lost contact with her for a while and in the mean time her daughter had a medical procedure done and passed a way from compilations. She was doing better but still had her days and her son was staying with her and her other son off and on. I met him and father of the year had met him before and knew him as well. I didn’t know he knew them either when we first got together. But we started taking him to church with us and letting him come over and hang out. He would come stay the night or stay the weekend and we would sit up and play games watch movies and go do stuff. The kids loved having him over he would play with them and run around with like a kid. It was sad because he told me his problem started after his sister passed a way. They were really close and he got really depressed. His mom fell into a bad depression as well. She started taking something for it and started giving him some of hers instead of taking him to get help. It just snow balled from there.
When I met RC I had no idea about his problem and never suspected a thing. Then look at everything I found, figured out and was told once shit hit the fan. He still denies it to the last day I seen him over a year ago.
I know they are both really good people but when you self medicate it turns into a really bed situation that gets out of hand very fast and is hard to come back from. This is one big reason I do not take pain pills for my back, and don’t go get something to help with depression. I know that I could really benifit from something to help with depression and stress at times. There are days that I can hardly move and could take a pill and feel so much better. But what happens when that one pill stops helping with the depression or that little pill stops helping with the pain? They up your amount or they change it to something stronger before you know it you are addicted and you can’t get off them if you want to. They say they help you slowly come off of them but your body has gotten so dependent on it that you have to keep taking them. It just isn’t good for your health to take them all the time either. I have more good days than bad right now and I can still move I haven’t gotten so bad I can’t function or move with out taking something. I am just holding off and waiting praying that there doesn’t come a time that the bad days out number the good and if it dose it don’t last long. That the pain stays it a point I can handle it and not get down and unable to do anything. I pray that as the pain grows my pain tolerance grows with it. Because I don’t know if I can bring myself to take something all the time for either one. I will take something for my back once in a great great while.
Alcohol is ok in moderation and if you can handle it. I don’t think a drink or two or beer or two a night is horrible. As long as you aren’t getting drunk every night or you can’t not drink because of getting sick or not being able to function with out it. Even to go out or stay home with friends it isn’t a big deal if you have a few more than normal or what. You just have to know your limits and make sure that you are drinking safely and not driving or responsible for taking care of kids and things if you are going to have more than a few once in a while. I know people who drink beer like it is cool aid and that is crazy and sad. To think how much they drink in a day and how it is effecting them. How they can’t live or function with out it. I just don’t get it. I like to drink once in a while and use to have one in the evenings with RC most the time when he would come home and we got the kids to bed. We would sit and talk. Sometimes I would have a couple. He would come home and make me a drink why I was making dinner or something. But we never had more than a couple if we had the kids with us and even if we didn’t we were always able to go and get them if need be.
I do feel that if you are trying to quite anything be it drugs or achlahal you can’t get rid of one and replace it with the other or something else like it to try and get clean. I know my friend went from the drugs to drinking to try to help things. It didn’t help anything he just became a drunk. One of the reasons I stopped letting him come to my house. He got to where he just wanted to come over so he could drink because his mom and brother wouldn’t let him drink at their house. I didn’t hardly ever drink back then and didn’t drink in front of my kids at all. I told him he couldn’t come there and drink either if I wasn’t doing it in front of my kids he couldn’t either. I know RC had started to drink a lot for a little bit there before we got to together I also think he had stopped the pills for a little while why we were together. I think he was trying to quite the one and cut back on the other when we got together. He was doing pretty good.
I know I am probably one of the very few who look at it this way and feel this way about them. But I have seen a lot from dealing with both first hand and not just from dealing with these two but many others in my family, friends and work. 98 % aren’t bad people they are just sick people who are fighting to over come something they unknowingly let over come them.