A Single Parents Life

{March 24, 2014}   Nothing Can Ever Be Easy

Or go as it should. Got everything set up to move paid got keys and killed myself to pretty much move everything alone this weekend to now not be able to move in until next weekend. Now that all my stuff is there beds and all. I guess someone who lived there before didn’t pay the bill so now I have to have all the deposit money upfront to get the lights turned on and I don’t have it until Friday.

Everything is paid up til May just got to pay the light and water deposit but won’t have money til Friday. Most the time they will give you 10 days to pay it in but now they say no it has to be paid first it dont’ matter who turns it on. I am so aggravated the kids are all upset and in moods. We were supposed to be in Sat and had to wait until today when we could get them to turn the stuff on. Then to find this out. We wanted to spend spring break in our new house now we get to spend it here with all the bs. Punish me for something someone else done. I can’t force the owner to keep the power on until we rent it. Feel like half set forward and 12 back. I am so tired and wore out from this weekend I just want to cry. I could have waited on a lot of stuff and been able to do some stuff with the kids why they were on break. But no we were going to have our new house we were going to do stuff there. Now we can’t do anything but sit here. they want us out.

{March 14, 2014}   I Think I’m Ready

I think I’m ready to start dating again. But defiantly doing things different this time around. This time around I’m going to take things way slower. Not getting into a relationship right a way. I’m going to explore my options more.

If/when I get into another relationship I’m still going to take things slow. They are just going to have to understand or move on. I have been through too much and put my kids through too much. I feel like my life has been on hold since I met RC. Right now it’s about getting my life back and achieving the things I want to before it’s to late.

I don’t expect them to just hang out and wait or just be there when I have time. That isn’t fair or right either. I plan to find a balance with everything and to be there for every one and thing as they need. But this time I have to keep things up and follow through with what I plan to do and need to do.

Things can’t be like they became when I got married to father of the year or with RC. I had plans to go back to school and things when I met father of the year and we ended up getting married. Once we did then I had my daughter and things just kind of got put on hold from there. I went and done my massage school but that wasn’t really what I wants to do and I heard about it the 7 months I was in there.

When I finally got a way from father of the year I decided I wanted to go back to school and work, I just wanted to get a job get the kids settled and things like that. Then I met RC. I still planed to do all that. But with things the way they were I was trying to wait for us to get a bigger place and kids settled. And we all know how that went.

This time no matter what happens my plans and things are coming first. I’m not going to put things on hold again to just maybe be screwed in the end when something “better” comes along.

{March 13, 2014}   I Was Robbed

I was robbed of being able to enjoy my pregnancy. I was robbed of having the labor and delivery I so wanted, with the person I wanted to be there. I was robbed of the family I loved more than life it’s self. I was robbed of a father for my daughter. I was robbed of the one and only person on this earth that I love as much as my kids. I was robbed of the one person I have truly been happy with in many many years. I was robbed of the person I thought I was going to spend the rest of my life with. I was robbed of my partner my best friend my true other half. I was robbed of my soul mate.

I wasn’t robbed by someone with a gun. I wasn’t robbed by someone with a knife. I wasn’t robbed by a car accident. I wasn’t robbed by some horrible illness. I wasn’t robbed by an injury. I wasn’t robbed by some freak accident.

I was robbed by something very simple. I was robbed by something of all different sizes. I was robbed by something of many different shapes. I was robbed by something of many different colors. I was robbed by something that goes by many different names. I was robbed by something that’s in just about any given home.

I was robbed by pills! I was robbed by addiction!

{March 13, 2014}   Disappointed Not Surprised

I said in my other post I had been hanging out with a new friend and we been talking getting to know each other the last week or so. She is a friend of a friend we see each other over there at parties and things. But never really talked about our life and things. mostly just talked in a group and joked. She is the one watching my dog for me until we can have her again.

We went to breakfast and the flea market then took the kids to lunch last week and were talking. She was telling me stuff that the friend we met through had told her about me and things going on and about things between me and RC. A lot of it was untrue and didn’t happen the way she told her at all. I told her that and she even said when she was telling me that some of it didn’t make since to her when she was telling her it. She thinks my friend had a crush on RC and was kind of trying to make him look good in all this or what. It really bothers me and upsets me. That she would do that and then act the way she dose to my face. But at the same time it really don’t surprise me because you can’t hardly trust anyone anymore. This was the one I let be there with me when I had my daughter. I really don’t think she is lieing about what she told me because it wasn’t like she just came out and started telling me. We were talking about my divorce and how things were between father of the year and what happen with me and RC. She started saying what and that isn’t what I heard and was told at all. I had said something about yeah that is what pills will do to you and things. She had no clue about that. She was told that DCF was about to be called on us because things we didn’t and didn’t do. The people she was told was there and going to do all this stuff wasn’t even in the picture didn’t know anything that was going on or nothing. One person did say they were going to call but not because of anything we did or wasn’t doing. They were just going to call about how many people we had in the house. But there is nothing they could have done about that either they all had beds and things. We were looking at places to rent and it isn’t ok with them if you are homeless with your kids if you can’t afford a place. How could they say that we were in the wrong because we had a place for them it just wasn’t the ideal size and we were looking for a place. The only reason this person was going to call was a control thing. She thought if she said that then we would give her rides everywhere and give her money when ever she wanted it because we would be scared to have them called out there. But she found it didn’t work that way and that it just got her phone calls from someone she really didn’t want to hear from and almost a ass whip-pen from me. The last time she called and said that shit on the machine because we had stopped answering the phone to her. I got up from dinner got my clothes on got my idea and headed to her door. RC stopped me and begged me not to go down there and to let him handle it so I did. Handle it he did she was coming over and calling begging him to fix things and saying she wouldn’t bother us no more.

It just sucks that its like there goes another friend. I am sure I will still talk to her and things because are kids are so very close. But I know we won’t be as close as we were and I won’t feel I can talk to her like I use to about things. It isn’t like she got somethings mixed up or confused even it was just all twisted made up lies.

The other girl also brought something interesting up that I hadn’t even said to her. She was saying how she was friends with her and how close they were supposed to be and things but then how she turned around and is buddy buddy with her ex her kids dad and talks to him and more than her now. She also said that her ex husband that she had only met one time all of a sudden she is friends with and talks to all the time. Then her ex she came back down here with about a year ago who ended up treating her really bad and did all kinds of stuff to her. I was there I know what all happen and the friend I met her through and who told her all this stuff had been telling me how she was helping her and trying to get him locked up and how she as scared of him and scared for her and things. She is now friends with him and talks to him and was trying to tell her all about him and things. She said she found that kind of odd. I do to with that one because she was telling me the same thing she was scared of him and wanted him locked up didn’t like him and blah blah. She said she also thinks that she is giving her number to her one ex because no one has it but her who knows him and he always gets it no time after she changes it. I was thinking about it and I said you know I think she is still talking to RC some way as well just by different things she has said and she use to look at his page even when I didn’t or didn’t bring him up she would all the time and be looking at it. I don’t know why she had no reason too. When he moved it killed her to know where he was living. She went a drove around until she found his house. I was with her one day and she went and found it we drove by and he was sitting out front working on his bike. She was so glad we found it. I also think the fact that anytime we were together and I wanted to stop and say something to him or anything she always had some reason not to. Even her husband said a few times hell yeah I would have stopped to there nothing wrong with it. She oh no this and that. Anytime I say something about him she acts funny and when I say I am going to get someone to look him up get address and things for him she says oh I think I can get that for you but she never dose.

I all so had a problem with someone telling others stuff that wasn’t true and all twisted and things a few different times the last year or so. We were talking about it and she right a way started saying it was my friend J and he husband I had started talking to more and become friends with because I met them from RC and they were his friends first. But I really didn’t believe it and proved some of it wasn’t them but her sister. I know that part of what her sister said had to come from her as well because she don’t even live close and was talking about a bunch of stuff that she wouldn’t even know about. So she has told her some stuff too. I had someone else tell me before you have friends who talk and you be surprised what I can find out or what I know. The stuff they knew wasn’t right either. It was all stuff that I have no idea where it came from or stuff that was twisted and turned into something it really wasn’t.

The more I think about it and the more I hear I am sure it is all coming right from her. The more I think about it the less I really want to have to do with her. I guess I will just have to let it all play out and see where the pieces land. I am not going to say anything yet because the other girl asked me not to say anything about what was said between me and her. She told me stuff about her that wasn’t true either. And made her out to be way worse than she is. But in the end that is how she has made all this out to be that everyone is so much worse off than her or under her and she is so good. But it is all going to come out. I am going to get her to hang herself. Then she can’t say anything or denies it. She can’t get mad at anyone else for saying anything. I love how everyone thinks I’m just so stupid and have no clue what they are doing or won’t find out. A lot I had wondered about for a while but wasn’t to worried about because she don’t know anything to tell anyone that I wouldn’t tell them myself and anyone who knows me knows how things really are. The others do but just like her want to cause problems.

{March 13, 2014}   Going Back To Work

I have been talking to the girl who has been watching our dog for us until we get moved to somewhere we can have her. We went out and took the kids out last week. I hadn’t really talked to her and hung out with her before. She was a friend of a friend and I had seen her at her house and talked to her but just hey how are you the weather is nice joking around. It was nice to get out and talk and get to know each other. Turns out we have a lot in common. I really enjoyed haning out with her and we are going to hang out tomorrow get the kids out of the house.

But I asked her if the place her boyfriend works was looking for drivers she said she didn’t know she would ask him. They are a lot of times. She said he could also get me on this other place probably with no problems if they weren’t because he worked there a really long time and knew them all. He also knows the people who own a few of the restaurants in town and said if the other two places weren’t looking for people he could talk to them and see if they had something and maybe get me on out at one of them. He was supposed to talk to people today and I should find something out when we go out later today. It’s sad that around here it is not about what you know it is about who you know when you are looking for a job.

I would be so great to go back to work and have money coming in. Between what I have now support for my oldest three kids and what I would make working I could get me and the kids a place of our own. She said it would be part time 25-30 hours a week. I had just told father of the year and someone the night before that I wouldn’t mind taking something as long as it was at least 20 or more a week. Full time would be nice but the 25-30 would be ok. I could probably work into full time maybe. But right now it will be good to get use to working again, get the kids use to me working get school and daycare settled and things like that. It is going to be hard on the kids with me going back to work they are so use to me just being here all the time. I am hoping I can talk to my friend J and she will be able to watch the kids and get them to and from school or whatever I need. If not maybe between her and my other friend I can work something out with them. I won’t bring home a lot after I pay a sitter but it will be better than nothing and show that little bit extra I need to show. No one has to know I pay daycare or how much. For all they need to know is that I have friends who split it up and help me because I am a single mom and they are free in the day because they don’t have to work. Praying for lots of good news tomorrow. I would even take two if I could work them around each other and sitters.

{March 13, 2014}   One Step Closer To…..

Being debt free, $5970.50 to be exact. Not bad considering I was about $$8500 give or take in. Didn’t happen under the best way it could have and I really could use the money right now I am ok with it. I’m not stressed and feel that everything is going to be ok.

We filed our taxes last Wednesday and by Friday they said it would be in the bank by Tuesday. I was hoping it would slide through without being caught and just go in since they did it so fast. But it didn’t. I owe student loans. Wait I owed student loans and was in default. I should have taken care of it but really hadn’t felt like it and then just busy. I didn’t know what to tell them either I really didn’t have any money to pay them. I have sat here for months and months without a dime to do anything. Just now starting to get things turned around. When I tried to talk to them all they wanted to hear was that I would send them X amount every month. I couldn’t so I just hadn’t called them back. Well Monday when I checked my taxes it said they had taken the $5970 out for my loans. They are now all paid off. Don’t leave much to move on none to fix my truck or try to buy the one I been looking at or any to start the business I had been working on. But at least I don’t have to worry about it. It least it won’t happen when it is just me and the kid and we may need it more than we do now.

The good new to is I can now go back to school. I can get government grants and loans again. I am going to try to go in next week and see if it is to late to sing up for summer classes online. I’m not taking out anymore loans right now. Just going to do what I can with grants. Then will see what to do with the rest. Maybe closer to the end I may take a few out. But once I finish school I shouldn’t have any problems paying them back. I will get a better job then I have ever had I hope and make decent money.

I the next big thing I have to get paid off is the loan I took out with RC on my truck. It is about two thousand maybe twenty five hundred now I’m sure. I paid and paid on it but after I had the baby I wasn’t able to pay on it. I have had to use that money to pay for stuff for the baby every month. Diapers and things are not free and with no help from RC I been doing it all myself. I am thinking that when I go for support on itty bitty asking them if they can have him help pay the loan back. I don’t know if they will but if they do that will be great every little bit helps. I could take him to court and sue him for it but don’t know if I really want to be bothered with all that. I have to find him and go to court and everything for baby girl and finish court with father of the year over our divorce so I probably won’t even mess with it.

Other than that I have a couple little things here and there that I need to take care of. Then I should have pretty good credit. I will have credit for once that isn’t good or bad or none. I went from none to bad.

{February 28, 2014}   My Favorite Child

Do you have a favorite child? Mine use to ask me who my favorite was when they were little. I had no clue how to answer that. I don’t really have a favorite I love them all the same and try to treat them all fair and never really thought about a favorite. I do think boys are easier than girls but they aren’t my favorite. I don’t know what made me say it but one day one of them said something about favorite and I just said your my favorite insert child’s name.
Every since then whenever we talk or I’m playing with them or when I tell them I love them I always tell them your my favorite big boy or my favorite whatever one I am talking to their name. Sometimes they will smile big and say really I am your favorite whatever. My oldest son said I’m your only boy           . I just said your right just makes it that more special because there won’t be another you so therefor you don’t have to ever worry about me having  another favorite    . He said yeah I guess your right and went on.  

{February 25, 2014}   Few & Far Between

I know I haven’t been posting much again but I just really haven’t had anything to post about. Well I have had lots to post about but mostly vents and rants. I do a lot of the two here sometimes it helps to just get it out and let it go. But lately I haven’t felt the need to do that. I’m not really sure why other than the fact that I am no longer trying to keep the peace, be nice, ignoring them, or anything else. Because that is what I had been doing just to keep from fighting to keep from getting into everything and to keep from dealing with them at all. I would just listen walk a way and hold everything inside. I got tired of feeling stressed out and like I was walking on egg shells and bending over backwards to keep from looking like the bitch or being talked about like dirt behind my back. I decided that I wasn’t doing it anymore. If someone said something I was going to have my say if they didn’t like it and wanted to keep on then that’s what we would do. Because it don’t matter what I do or don’t do they still make shit up about me treat me like shit make me out to be the bitch and the one in the wrong. Have all my life nothing is going to change it why keep being stressed over it for no reason and being nice to back stabbers and users. I may as well give them what they give me and if they don’t like it to bad. What is she going to do tell me to leave? Oh wait I forgot she did the other day. She told me I needed to have my friend come and get me. I don’t know why she thought I needed to have her come and get me. I have a truck and I am capable of taking care of myself. But then when I came home she was just as nice as could be acted as if nothing ever happen. Since I haven’t been holding it all in I haven’t felt the need to vent or rant. I have felt pretty good really. I have felt more positive and happier for a little while now. I wrote about it here (  Feeling Alive ) when I first started to just feel better. I was stressed being here but not the stress and depression that had set in. Now I don’t feel any of the stress. I feel like I am finally a wake from a sleep I have been in for years. I said before that when me and RC got together I felt like I was living again and like I had to learn to live all over again. I felt like I had been so isolated from the world for so long and like it was passing me by. It was just me and the kids dropped into another life. Then everything happen with me and RC and I went into an even deeper depression and isolation than I had been before. I really and truly felt like I was die. There is no other way to explain it than I felt I was just going to lay down go to sleep and never wake up again and I was really pretty ok with that. I was so heartbroken over what happen I was angry and enraged over what happen. I was pissed off and mad at myself for what happen and what I put my kids through. I couldn’t come to terms with being pregnant and what life was going to be like for my baby and bringing another life into such a horrible mess and ruining another life before it was even here. I felt like the lowest of the low. I still struggle with somethings from time to time but not near as bad as I did. Then I was right back in isolation again, back into the stress and dealing with so much stuff I wasn’t ready to deal with. I felt like i wasn’t living again. I felt like I was just hear and didn’t really know what was going on just going through the motions to get through the day. Then I had that peace and calm feeling come over me and I have truly felt a lot better about everything. Just the stress of being here and even it I just kind of ignored. I now feel like I want to do things and that I have the energy to do them. Not just I want to do them but I have no energy to get up and get them done. I wanted to do them and wanted them done so bad I just had no desire to do them. No energy to make myself do them and no reason to because I had no fight left in me to get them done even if I started them. I know feel like I have it all back and that I can do anything again. I’m ready to take on the world. I could have a lot more done since I wrote the above post, but I have been trying to do everything the best I can and make sure everything is right and it is the right time to do it. I don’t want to have to fight once I start something. But if I do I want to know that I am ready for whatever is thrown at me. I want to make sure I have the time and means to take care of anything that comes up and to be able to get it done in a timely manner not let it drag out like it has because I get desc urged by other stuff. With all that I haven’t had much to write about because I have found other ways to deal with things that are going on. I have still been writing about the good things but they are few and far between right now. I would rather have them be few and far between than just whatever just because I need a post.

{February 25, 2014}   Take The Money And Run

All hell has broke lose the last week and has really got me to thinking about life and the future for me and the kids. It has been a while coming I have truly gotten to the point that I really just don’t care and haven’t been holding back when it comes to stuff around here. Thursday night and Friday morning it all blew up. I went to find a motel room but with the Daytona 500 there was nothing open for the week. It was the only way I could afford to get anything was pay for the week rather and a night or two here and there. So we are still here but trying to figure out what to do by Friday before we have to pay rent again here. I really want to go get a motel room but I hate to do that to the kids. But I know they don’t like it here either other than my daughter she would stay here because she gets treated like a princess and like she is the only one here. But that’s a post in of it’s self.

I am thinking that the best thing for me and my kids as for right now and to have a better future and not end up in this same spot again is to just get out of here now why we can. I think that when tax money comes we need to take it and get out of here. We keep saying we are going to save money and go or go when school gets out this year or that and it never happens. I bought my house almost 7 years ago not to keep and live in forever but as an investment. Something to put a little work into and turn around and sell. I had $50,000 in equity when I closed on it.  If everything hadn’t of happen the way it did and we were able to put the work in it and sell it we were going to take that money and move then. We figured we would have a good amount to go somewhere start over and buy a nice place or at least pay a good amount down on one.

My mom always says she wants to go she has since we were little but never has. Every year she says she is going to go and lets go but then she never dose. My dad has always said if we find a place then he will come. I have my sister and her family and things here I didn’t really want to leave them or my grandparents either. They all say they want to go but they never do anything to go. It seems every time I think I have the money to go something happens I end up having to spend it for a car or to fix on or on bills and don’t have it. Father of the year would come up with some excuse not to go.

I been talking to father of the year and I really don’t feel like I have anything worth staying here for anymore other than friends and I can’t stay because of friends. Because they can up and do who knows what at the drop of a hat depending on what changes  in their life. I can come back and see them and they can always come see me. They are more than welcome anytime and can stay with me. I have hardly talked to my sister the last couple years and we had it out a while back because the only time you hear from her anymore is when she calls and says can you give me a ride now to where ever. Then gets mad if you don’t drop everything and do it. My mom I am just done with and over she makes it miserable and impossible to live with or even want to live close too. I use to not care if she wanted to move somewhere where we went. But honestly anymore I don’t want her to live anywhere close to me. She is another one who uses’s all the time. I am tired of being used and treated like shit by everyone. It’s sad to say that it is family who are the ones who are the worse and do it all the time. I use to hate the idea of my kids not growing up with family around. I had all my family on my moms side and my step dads side around loved it. But our family has not been close and I hardly talk to any of them at all other than the ones that want to use and cause problems and that is the only reason I hear from them. They want something or they are causing problems. I would rather my kids not have their family around than to grow up to be like them.

I would like to wait until school is out in May but I am having such problems here with things and with my daughters school that I am really thinking of going the beginning of April. If I withdraw her and tell them we are moving the days she is not there won’t count against her. I can take her and put her back in school when we get there. I hate to take my son out and normally would wait until the end of the year. But if we decide to do this we need to do it right now and it is going to be better for everyone in the long run. It is only about 6 weeks of school that will be left, maybe 8 or 10 where we end up. That will let them get use to things a little and meet some kids before summer starts and they know no one. Let them feel the school out before started brand new the next year as well. If it wasn’t so close and only a few weeks left I wouldn’t do it that way. I may even just home school them the last month. I have to talk to them and decide.

I don’t plan to tell anyone what we are doing until a few days or week before we go. Once we know for sure we are going and at that point it don’t matter what anyone says or dose I’m not changing my mind or staying here if that is what we decide we are doing. I know my mom will have a fit because she wants to get out of here to so she says still. I said the other day I would like to just get my money and leave now and forget it all. She said then she wouldn’t have no money to go on then. I just didn’t say anything to her. Her and my grandma are staying together they could go. My grandma gets her SS and retirement and rents are a lot cheaper than what she is paying here most places we are looking. But they are not going to be staying with me or me with them.

I told father of the year we wait we are never going to have money to go. We can’t find decent jobs or any jobs here really as it is. What we do find all goes to rent and bills not any left to save. We should get about $8,000 back. I will get the money I get the first of each month and he will get at least two checks this month. Plus the first of the month will be here again when we are ready to leave so I will have my check again.

We will have about $7500 in our pocket when we get there. That is with paying all the bills this month renting a truck to put all our stuff in and paying the gas on it and my truck. Then I will have checks coming the first of March. I will get mine and he should have a week or two pay coming. At least a week maybe two.

I want to research some areas now pick out a few we think look good and then research places to live and jobs. I want to spend the next month calling around talking to people. Explain everything to them that we are coming from out of state that we want to have something lined up to move into when we get there. Make sure that we have at least two places that say yes no problem we can pull into town do the paper work and unload. Would like to have more like 4 in different areas of the same town lined up.

That way when we get into town we can check them all out decide what one we like the best and move in. This way we aren’t paying for motel rooms when we get there and rent on the truck for days we don’t need it or storage. I am also going to be looking at jobs in the areas and applying for some to try to line something up so that I can go to work as soon as we get up there. I am going to try to line it up so that I go back about a week maybe two after I get up there. Give me time to get the house put together and settle in before I start a new job in a new place. Give the kids time to adjust. And figure out the school thing. It will take a lot of what I have left when we get there but I want to pay the rent up as far as I can when we get there. That way if I don’t find a job right a way I won’t have to worry to much about it. I will have my check coming each month to pay bills and things. I also plan to pay half the rent each month so that it stays a little ahead. Then when I get a job I want to pay so much out of each check depending on if I get paid weekly or by weekly. So that the rent is always ahead and paid by the first. I just feel better doing it that way. Even if I don’t pay it but just buy money orders so that I can’t dip into it and spend it and send them all out the first.

I figure if I do it this way then I should have a pretty good chance of making it once we are there. If I can have a place lined up to go right into and pay ahead and hopefully have a job lined up or get one shortly after getting there. I hope to have my divorce over by then so I will be getting that money too. I am not going to go after baby girls dad until I get moved because I have been told that if I go after him here and he stops paying that once I get somewhere else I have to start it over. FL won’t go after him because I am not here and the other state will not enforce another states order. I am going to check more into it and see if it is true for sure. But I also know that it will take me longer than a month to get him found served and in court so it will really be a waste of time to even start it if I am really leaving in a month or so. I am not really worried about it I have went this long with out it I will make due until I get it if it means we will be better off in the long run. Right now I think we will. The jobs pay more than here by $2 and hour most of them. The rents are lower and comparable to here. The only difference is other places we could have a bigger nicer place for the same money we pay here. Even for less than what we pay here we could have a nice place. Now the research begins. I have to look up all the little towns and things see what rents are like jobs and schools and try to pick the best one out of them all. It is so hard doing it online and not knowing anything about these places. I want something small but not supper small. I don’t want to drive 30 miles to work everyday but I don’t want to be in big area. I want to be out of town.

I also want to do it why father of the year is on board with letting us move and willing to help us get our stuff there. This way he can’t go to court and try to stop it or make me come back. Because here he can go to court and make me stay here because of the kids so he can see them. But if he is willing to let me go and helps get our stuff there if he tries to then go back and try to make me come home I don’t think it will work. They are going to look at him and say if you cared and didn’t want them to go then why would you help them get there and get all their stuff there.

Anyone in GA? What area? How are schools, jobs, rents, and crime?

{February 17, 2014}   8 Kids + 4 Dogs =

A great weekend! My friend who is always there for me and my kids and who has helped us anytime we need it said the other day at my daughters bday they were going away for V Day without the kids. I told her if she needed someone to watch them I would come up and do it. They had already asked someone but wasn’t sure they were going to do it. Last weekend she asked me if I still wanted to do it so I told her sure. Our kids have been asking forever since we both moved when they could sleep over together. Boy it is a job to pack 4 kids stuff for two days you need so little and so much at the sametime when taking the baby along it is insane really.

She took two of hers to her moms for the weekend they wanted to see them and spend sometime with them. Her one can be a handful by herself but I think she has learned that I don’t play and when I say something I don’t change my mind like her mom and dad. She hasn’t gave me a problem really anymore. But when we all lived by each other I took her sister home with me for about a week and she asked to come. I told her no and when she asked why I told her you don’t listen to me when I am here watching you and you laugh and think it is funny I do not let kids who behave like that come to my house and play or spend the night. Your sister is always good and dose what I ask her and she don’t laugh at me and ignore me if she gets in trouble. She kept begging please please and I didn’t back down I left her there. Since then she has been pretty good. But she has been having problems since they moved and she wanted to give her others a break from them too so she took them there.

It worked out nice I had my 10 month old two 3 year olds two 8 year olds and two 10 year olds and a 13 year old. They all played with their friend and they all wanted to play with the baby, the 13 year old helped out with all of them. They all had a blast.

We didn’t do a lot the Friday night can’t really remember what we did other than do dinner and baths. They played and played with the dog that showed up and ended up staying the night with us. As my friend and her husband walked out the door to leave this English bull dog came running up, he had been there before someone wanted to know if it was theirs. I was able to get her down and look she had a tag it had a address and phone number. The address we weren’t sure where it was they just moved there it wasn’t close there. I seen the number he called and they guy said he was out of town and wouldn’t be back until the morning. I told them if they didn’t care I didn’t she could stay on the back porch til they came to get her. So that is what we did. We all wanted to keep her she was so friendly and playfull. She didn’t have enough dog food for her dogs and it so I gave her pizza that we had for dinner she was really happy. She played with the kids through the door. I felt so bad for her she was so smelly and had fleas. I wanted to bath her but it was to cool and they picked her up before I got to the next day. We had to shuffle them all around to let her dogs out and keep them apart. The 3 year olds opened the back door and let her in and ran so they were all running through the house laughing and playing. She shot past the baby and she took off crawling after her as fast as she could go.

Saturday night was a lot of fun I think it was the best night. I took them out to play for a hour or so then we went in. Why I made dinner they got baths. Then they did karaoke and danced all around the bedroom and livingroom for hours. After that they sat up until two in the morning playing monopoly. I keep falling asleep around midnight on. I finally got up about 1:30 and told them to count their stuff who ever had the most won and to put it a way we weren’t staying up any later playing. But it was nice they all slept in until 11.

I felt so bad when we were getting in the truck to leave. My boys were telling me they didn’t want to go home they didn’t like it at home they wanted to stay there. They really don’t like it here and the way things are. My oldest ask me all the time when we are moving and having our own place. my baby boy cried when I put him in the truck and made him come. He keep telling me I don’t like your home I am staying here.

I got to get on the ball and get this paper work done so we can get out of here. I want to do it it’s just so much to figure out and I have to do it with the kids. I have to keep stopping and doing stuff and coming back. I can’t just sit and think about what i have to do and what I am filling out. I think I am going to take it to my friends this week she can help with the kids I can look it over get it done and call around to the places I need to. I really was so nice being there and not here with my mom and father of the year. Even with 8 kids to take care of it was way more laid back and relaxed. I had a good time.

It was good for my friend to get a way and just relax too. Her brother passed away in expectantly this week and she has been dealing with that and family that is less than helpful. He was out of town seeing other family of his so they have to wait for everything to be done there before they can bring him home and do anything. I really thought they probably wasn’t going because of it but her husband so no they were going she needed to get away from everything and just get her mind off of it. She has been a mess and it is starting to affect the kids. Please pray for her and her family.

et cetera

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