Single___Parent___Life











{January 26, 2012}   How Soon Is Too Soon

To bring the person your seeing, talking to or dating around to meet your kids? I have went back and forth with this and just don’t know. I would like to at least be in a relationship with the person not just dating or hanging out before I bring them around. But then realistically thinking that just don’t seem feasible seeing as I have them threw the week and every other weekend. That would mean we would go two weeks with out seeing each other or doing anything together. I can’t see that working out to well either.

I just don’t want the kids to get use to having someone around or doing things with someone and then things not work out with that person. It’s bad enough things went the way they did with me and their dad. Not only that then they are dealing with the same kind of thing at their dads because he is going to be dating again too I’m sure. We don’t really agree on this. He thinks it is fine to bring them around from the start. Really he don’t have to worry about it to much because he don’t have them all the time so he can see them whenever. So he wouldn’t have to have them around the kids until they were more sure about where or if the relationship was going somewhere or not. I guess it will have to be worked out when the time comes. It is just something that has been on my mind.

 



supamagle says:

Here’s my take, do not worry about what HE does. You are no longer together so unless you plan to bring him to court to change something when he is with the kids, mind your business. Sounds harsh but…
Next here’s an option for you, get a baby sitter or close friend to watch the kids when you want some free time. If that’s not possible, have them come over when the kids are asleep. Do this though after you are very used to the person and trust them being in your home. Men who also have children are usually more understanding of the situation.
But I agree having Tom, Dick and Harry pass through your home is not a good example for the kids.
It should at least be a fairly stable relationship before introductions are made.



I figure it will pretty much have to be when they are in bed at night. Or one of them maybe once in year times I find a sitter. That is the other thing that has been on my mind too is meeting someone I trust and want to even have around my kids. I am not one that trust anyone very easily.
As for him I know I can’t really say what he does but I don’t want just who ever around them over there either or someone different in an out every time I turn around either. We haven’t went to court yet we are going to file next week I hope. But still can’t really do anything in court about that either. We will just see what happens. Hopefully he won’t do that.



I’ve heard to raise your kids before you date again, but I sure couldn’t do that!!! I agree with supamagle above. Good luck! 🙂



Yeah I just don’t think I can wait 17 1/2 years to start dating again. I will just have to work it out so that I make time for everyone until I feel it is a good time for everyone to be together. Whoever it is will just have to understand that. It will sure weed out who is in it for what that is for sure. 😉



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