Since me and RC broke up I have talked to my friend here and there online and went by to see him one night a few weeks ago. He messaged me and we talked a few times why I was with RC nothing bit really just how was I doing or what was wrong if I said something and seemed in a bad mood or like something was wrong or just to say hi. Once right before me and RC split up he said something abut coming over and doing something when I said something about being bored. I said I couldn’t I was with him he knew that and things. He said yeah I know I was just kidding kind of.

About a month after that me and RC split up and there was about a month and a half that I didn’t talk to anyone or leave the house. Just to much going on didn’t want to talk to anyone or deal with anyone. Then we talked a little here or there and Halloween we talked a lot and after that is when I stopped by to see him. It was kind of awkward at first I don’t know why really it just was I guess because we hadn’t talk in a while and and things. We were sitting there talking and things and he gave me a hug and had his arm around me. He said something about missing me and things and we talked some more. It was early then.

We got to talking about other stuff and kissed and things he asked me if I had a curfew I told him no he said good you can just spend the night with me. I said I could I just need to leave by 5 or 6. He said yeah why is that. I said I don’t have a set time to be home but seeing as the kids are home I like to be there before they get up in the morning. He agreed that was a good idea. We hung out there listening to music and talking and things for a while.

We laid down for a while after a while he fell asleep. I laid there and watched tv and things for a little bit. That was the night I just felt something was wrong with the kids and I needed to go home. I told him I needed to go got dressed and left. Thats the night I came home and my big boy was passed out on the couch with a fever of 103.5. I got a hold of him why I was in the ER and told him where I was and that I felt like something was wrong that’s why I left. He said sorry to hear that and it sucked he hoped he was ok we got home soon.

We haven’t really talked much since then. I was going to see if he wanted to get together this weekend and do something and then this happen with my grandpa. He hasn’t said much since then either we talked a few times and he has asked how the kids were and things. He knows the boys seem to get over one thing and get something else. He hasn’t said anything since my grandpa passed.

But I’m confused when we started out we started out just friends doing what we were doing. He wasn’t looking for anything more and I was but it didn’t have to be with him. I was ok with what we were doing because we both knew it wasn’t anything more than friends and it may last a few weeks it may last a few months. One of us may find someone else or anything could happen. But we both knew that before we done anything and we both were ok with that. Then he started talking about wanting more and seeing where things went after a few weeks. But that’s when I snapped and all this happen Funny How Emotions Can Make You Say Things You Normally Wouldn’t.

But if we weren’t anymore than what we were doing and we never go back together to talk and things after he had said he wanted more and all that got said. Then when we talked since me and RC broke up he never said anything about anything that happen before or wanting anything more this time around. We never really talked about how either of us felt or anything this time. We just did what we did.

I don’t understand if we are just friends and doing what we are doing why is he so set on wanting me to stay the night all the time? Getting together to do things on the weekend and taking his daughter out and things. I haven’t brought my kids around him because we are just doing what we are doing and I don’t want them to get use to him attached to him or his daughter and then we decide not to see each other for whatever reason or what. I have brought my baby boy with us a few times we got together I gave him a ride or we went and checked on something together. But my baby boy is to small to really know anything a person is just a person to him. I understand him bring him daughter she is like my baby boy she was little and he really has no one to watch her. He is like me it is just him and her. Sometimes his brother will watch her for a little bit or over night when they were staying together. But her mom isn’t in the picture most of the time at the time and he don’t have anyone else. He said the other week when I was there she wasn’t he said her mom does come and get her like once a week most the time. But that’s it. Other than ex I have my kids all the time too.

So I don’t know what to think he wants to get together and do things or wants me to come over. But he don’t say what he wants anything more than what we are doing or what. But then why does he get so upset or what if I don’t stay the night? Then not say anything for days at a time or what. I can see us getting together and doing things I get together with other friends and do things and we got together and done things before we started sleeping together. Back when we first met we use to hang out all the time. Him and his girlfriend and daughter lived in the apartment behind me. We were all kids and I was friends with his wife and sister and his mom and my mom were friends. We never hung out alone of curse but we were always together in groups hanging out at their place.

Really I don’t know that I would be interested in anything more than just being friends or what we are doing. After everything that I have been threw the last 7 months or so and wanting to move. If we had talked then and decided to give it a try and got together and were still together and things then it would be one thing. But now with everything the way it is I don’t think I am ready to be in a relationship. If I can get out this weekend I think I am going to talk to him and see if he wants to get together and talk. I still want to know what happen before and why we never got together and talked. I am fine with things the way they are but I want to know what he really wants and looking for. Don’t just want me to come over and stay and things and then get upset because I can’t stay or what. Then not tell me what you really want and things. Guess maybe this weekend we shall find out if I can get out and we can get together.

Edited to ad: See I went to feed the kids and have dinner get them ready for bed. My phone goes off and it is him sending me a message. He said he wanted to say sorry for not being around the last few day he has been busy. He said the few times I said something online he wasn’t on where he could message back. But then again I haven’t talk to him in days and then out of  the blue he gets in touch with me. I just don’t understand it.


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