Why is it that these guys can have these kids and do whatever they fucking please and walk a way and never think twice about it. Or be there when they want to and screw off and fuck around when they don’t and no one thinks twice or says a word about it? But when you are fighting your ass off to do right by your kids and find a job and take care of them 24/7 everyone looks at you like your such a horrible person because you expect a little help from them once in a while or at least for them to fucking man up and do what they should be at the least for their kids.
They have these kids and they walk off and go on with their life. They are free to come and go as they please and feel. They get whatever job they want and never bat and eye because they don’t have to worry about them getting to school or daycare or even freaken paying for daycare. They just walk off and leave it for you to take care of. Why you fight to get a job to even make enough to pay daycare and maybe bring something home in a week if your lucky. If you do find a job that pays it also has to have hours that allows you to get said children up and shipped off to two different schools and 2 more to said daycare. Then in the afternoon you have to be there to get said children off the bus and be with them or now make enough to pay daycare for them too. That would be find if you could make enough to pay daycare but then you still have the one who daycare dose not pick up from their school and the bus drops them at the end of the street on their own to far to walk home and at 8 don’t need to be walking the side of the busy high way home with a disability I may ad. then when they get home who is here to great them and make sure they are ok until you get home. More money out of your already disappearing check.
But people who haven’t been there and had to do it just don’t get it and look at you like you just want to complain or play poor me. No I am not trying to play the poor me card or that you just don’t want to work. I love the ones that say there is always a way. Yeah well i would like you to show me because I have no family around here that helps with anything. The only time I hear from them is when they want or need help with something. I have very few friends that I talk to and they know the spot I am in and even though they don’t work don’t have to and are home with their kids they don’t offer to help out or if they do it is with the baby because she is the easiest to deal with they just plop her down and give her some toys or put her to bed. Only thing she dose is eat and sleep pretty much. They are not use to dealing with boys and just don’t want to deal with other kids.
Now ex got this new job he is on call 24/7. I was looking for a night job and had picked up baby sitting in the day time. But that is out of the question now because I can’t leave at night with out having someone here all night until I get back in case he has to leave. Or find someone to be on call all night in case he has to leave. Then he has to get up and go right now and get on the road if he isn’t in the truck and gone with in 5 or 10 minutes they get mad and he risk losing the job. I don’t have anyone close enough to be able to do that. and not be ready at the drop of the hat 24/7 and not get paid for it. Even when he goes out he may make $10 for that one call. He see’s nothing wrong with the situation the way it is. It is no big deal to him it isn’t him the one that has to worry about it or not able to work because of it. I say something about it he says well what do you want me to do about it.
He is such a fucking ass whole he was sitting here today laughing about stopping the divorce. Then says I really wasn’t trying to. You think I would do that. Everyone wants to look at me and say shit and give me looks and talk to me. No i didn’t plan to have 4 kids and live this way. It I’m not the one who decided they didn’t want to be married after 5 fucking years why I worked and took care of him for 2 fucking years why he didn’t work and everything else. I didn’t say anything I worked and went to school and did what I had to to take care of our family. Little did I know he could careless and wasn’t going to be around in a little bit anyway.
And I am not the one who don’t even have my kids or anything else now because I through everything a way because of drugs.
But I am the one that everyone looks down on because I am a struggling single mom with 4 kids. I’m the one who gets the stares the comments and everything else. Why they all walk the fuck around with their heads in their ass doing what they want when they want with out a fucking care in the world. They don’t even offer to call and see how their kids are doing for month. They wouldn’t even know if something happen to one of them and no one called them. Not that they care or they would be calling to start with. Done with my rant.