After I made sure my dad was doing ok and didn’t really need help with much and that they weren’t going to induce her until today I had father of the year to come and get me. I needed to get something done here at the house. We went to meat market and was supposed to get my tag I still haven’t gotten my tag. I had other stuff to take care of and had to take my big boy to see the therapist because he is having a hard time coping I can tell. When you try to talk to him about it he says can we just stop talking about this now or puts his hands over his ears. Plus he got out to see my dad when they picked me up and seen he was doing so much better than what he was the night before. He said oh I’m so glad to see grandpa doing better. He has to understand that he may have good days but he is going to have bad days too and that it is going to get to where the bad out do the good and he isn’t going to be here any more. They talked some and we were set to go back for our normal time today but things happen and we couldn’t.
When we went in to see the therapist she got done with the other people they left and she came out was talking to us. The boys jumed up to go in the other room I told them to sit down I wanted to go in and talk to her a minute first. We went in I told her everything so she knew what had been going on. She said I knew it had to be really bad for you to ask to come before his normal day and say you would keep both days. She said I don’t think you have ever asked to come two days. After I told her what was going on why we were there we told the boys they could come in. Father of the year was with us and he came in and sat down. We were all sitting on the floor we always do she dose too. It works better for her and the kids she is working with.
Right after they all came in and sat down I felt really funny. Everything go supper blurry I was really dizzy I guess you would say. It was like someone had a hold of my head and shaking it as hard as they could back and forth. Everything was moving. I couldn’t get it to stop. I looked at him and I was going to say something but I knew that we really needed to be there and he needed to talk to her. I didn’t want to leave after she stayed late to see us and we were just getting started. About the time I started to say something it stopped. Then later I got sick all of a sudden out of no where. I was able to get up and make it to the bathroom at least.
After we left there we came home it was already 6 since we went a couple hours later than our normal time so we could get in. I just really didn’t feel good and was tired. I had been up all night the night before. I laid down on my bed for a little bit. Everything started spinning again laying there. Later I got up to go to the store and get some stuff we needed and to drop some stuff off at my moms for the girls they stayed over there Sunday when I stayed with my dad and they were staying again. On the way there the lights as we were going down the road were killing my eyes everything kept spinning. We passed a police car that was parked but had his lights going it was horrible. I sitting there with my eyes closed and just the movement was bothering me.
I had told the kids a few times the last couple weeks I wondered if I wasn’t trying to get a ear infection. Just way I felt off and on. My ears don’t hurt but I just feel over all sick. I will get kind of dizzy this was like nothing I had ever felt before. I figured if I was this dizzy and feeling that bad I needed to go get something for it because there was no way I could drive like that and I need to be able to get up and go at the drop of a hat. I just felt way to bad. I had father of the year drive me to the hospital after we dropped the stuff at my moms. We drove all the way over to the one hospital because the one closest to us I wouldn’t take a dog to. It was packed hardly no where to park and a ton of people sitting inside. I told him to take me to the other one since it was just for me and not one of the kids or someone else. He said something about the one my dad went to. So we drove the 30 miles or so to it. I was so bad by the time we go there for all the riding and lights. I told him to go get a wheelchair. He got one and I had my big boy get out and push me in. He did a good job only hit the wall once. They checked my oxygen levels and things then sent me to wait. They were empty so I didn’t have to wait long. They took me to triage and did a ekg and was going to put me in a room. Then they got a critical patient in on the ambulance and had to move people around so they put me back in the waiting room for a few minutes. I figured I would be there a while but they came right back and got me.
The nurse gave me a gown and told me to put it on and went to walk out of the room and the doctor walked in. She handed him my paperwork and he talked to me a bit. He said the ekg looked good I told him I thought it was my ears he had me do a few things and said they were all ok. He was checking for stroke I hadn’t even thought of it being a stroke. He then checked my ears and said they looked really  good but it could be on set of ear infection. I told him that most the time I by the time I was feeling dizzy it was pretty bad, so I didn’t think it was from my ears. He was going to give me a rx just in case if they started hurting or anything I could take it instead of having to go back. He said he was going to give me something for the dizziness as well.
Then I asked him if not sleeping and/or stress would cause it and he said it could. I told him I hadn’t really slept in days. He asked why I told him we just found out New Years day my dad was terminally ill and was sent home on hospice care and that he had a bad night on top of it all and I had been there with him the night before. He said oh he said yeah it was probably stress and not sleeping causing it. He would give me something still for the dizziness. He was going to wait on the meds for the ears. I told him I was ok with that because if they weren’t infected then I didn’t think it was that causing it or that I was getting a infection.
He said it was vertigo brought on by lack of sleep and stress. I haven’t been feeling great today still haven’t gotten much sleep. I have eaten 4 times in 3 days and most of it has come back up from stress. I have held down two meals. I just hope that it goes a way. They said if it didn’t I need to go in have a mri and things done to look at the brain and ear I guess.
Like now I am so sleepy I can’t stand it but wide a wake at the same time. I lay down and I just lay there not even thinking or anything just lay there wishing I would fall a sleep. They few times I started to get into a deep sleep I was woke right up and that was it couldn’t get back to sleep if I did not a good deep sleep.

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