Since my dad passed away Sunday after noon I have been busy trying to run around and take care of things. I feel like I haven’t stopped since I got up Monday.
I had to get up first thing and be almost 50 miles from home by 9:30 am. We had to go get my little guys cast off his arm and see how it was healing. They cut it off and took the x ray. The doctor came in said it was healed great and took the pins out. He said they don’t have to go to therapy for it because they can’t do anything with the bone. That he should have his range of motion back in 6 weeks. He wants us to bring him back to check it. We had to move it out to 8 because I wanted to make it at the other office. I’m so stressed and tired I almost had a panic attack getting on the elevator trying to get him to the 5 th floor and back down.
We got back stopped had lunch and I dropped them off at home so I could rush about 20 miles north to do what needed to be done with my dad. We told them to send him to one home and they sent him to some place different. We got there and they talk to us for a minute and then took us in to pick out a casket and urn. My brother said we could get urns somewhere else. I told him I rather do it there get it over with. I had looked at the insurance policy but wasn’t sure how much he had. It was one where it pays out so much the first year a little more but not much the 2 nd and the full ten at 3 or more. He hadn’t hit the 3 year mark. He would have hit the 3 year mark in May of this year. We were not sure how that worked. I asked the lady if she knew how all that worked because we really weren’t sure. She looked said she didn’t know either she thought the 2 nd year amount of $1,100 something. She said she would call them and see. After a half hour or more she came back said they said they were not 100% sure but they thought just that was right. They said they had to look at it and something else and get back with her at 3 yesterday.
I asked her once the cremation was all paid for and all the other fees that there were to cover how much money was left to cover everything else. She says and if you do just a standard box for $50. adds it on. I said no I don’t want a box I want to know that once you all get your money how much money is left? She said around hundred and something.
Well when we were sitting there before we were looking she asked what we were going to do with his ashes. My brother got this look like he hadn’t thought of it and was a little freaked out. I said I thought about putting them on grandpa’s grave but they say he was really close to his mom so I was thinking we could have them put there. But I would like to have them until we decide and can do something with them. He said ok. I think it creeps him out the idea of having them or messing with them. Even with them being closed up in something. He had no problem and said yes to fast. So when we first went back and was looking at caskets and urns I seen one I wanted. He said lets wait on it so we started looking at caskets that’s when we stopped to see how much was there to work with.
When we found out how little was probably there to work with I said lets pick out a casket and we will have to take what isn’t covered out of his money in the bank and cover it. He said ok. I told him since I was going to have his ashes I would cover the price of the urn. I knew he would freak about the price of it and want to pick a different one. I thought it said $895 but wasn’t sure. That is a lot I know but I liked it and I figured yes we could probably get it somewhere cheaper but how much cheaper maybe $50. I rather just get it done with. We picked a casket out we needed $175 to finish paying for it. I told him to take my dads money and pay for that. It was his money so it should be used for him.
I told him lets look at the urns pick one so I knew how much I needed to bring her back today. I knew I wanted the one and felt if I was going to have his ashes and paying for it I should get to pick. But I knew it was only right to let him have some say. He liked this one metal looking one but said it looked something. Then he found another like it just a different color. He liked them because my dad liked to collect little coper and brass figures. But when I looked at it I just didn’t see my dad. They had one there for people who liked to fish and one for people who liked to hunt. I liked the one for people who liked to hunt. My dad use to love going to camp and hunting and most all my life he did tree work for the company that cuts trees for the power company. So I picked the one for people who liked to hunt that had trees and leafs on it. He came over looked at it more and said yeah that is nice I think that be a good one. So I told her I would bring her the Monday for it Wednesday. We had to go back Tuesday to see what the insurance people were going to do.
We talked about it Tuesday morning when we were looking through dads stuff. I asked him if it paid out the full amount did we want to change anything or leave it the way it was? We agreed we wanted to leave it the way it was. I knew I didn’t want to change the urn and the casket was really the only one they had we liked. I wouldn’t mind if it was picked for me. It is a light blue. It reminds me of the blue suits the guys use to wear back when my dad and grandpa were younger. It was kind of simple buy it was very nice and tasteful.
When I got there yesterday to go over everything with them and my brother he got there before I did. When I came in he said they were paying out the full $10,000. The lady acted like she wasn’t happy that we weren’t changing anything. And we decided not to get the urn from them. But that is a different post.
I am just happy that it is all taken care of and they are covering it and we didn’t have to worry about how to pay for it or what. That is one thing he didn’t want us to have to worry about or pay for. He would be really upset if he thought we had to. But I would have done it if we had to because I wanted to make sure he was taken care of. Just like the urn. I could have picked something for a lot less but I wanted something nice and that fit him. He has done so much for us I wanted to do this last thing for him. Even if like my brother said he would kick our asses if we spent that much on some of that stuff. But if they had something that I liked better I had no problem spending the full $10,00 for his cremation, casket and urn. That’s what the money was there for. Why when I first seen it and it and I thought it said almost a grand I wasn’t worried about it I figured the money was there may as well use it.
Today I spent getting bills and things taken care of around the house. I have let so much go this last month and a half or so. Between going to see my dad the kids appointments and just dealing with the depression and not feeling like doing anything. Bills have fallen behind, chores, house work, shopping are all such a mess.