Father of the year has been at his if I would just give him another chance blah blah again the other night he started texting me out of no where. How things weren’t his fault and how he tried and is trying. Telling me how I changed, I settled, oh and my favourite I threw us away first chance I got.
If I got out the first chance I had or first reason I could find, I would have left when I fought with him for two years to get me and our daughter our own place to live so we weren’t living with someone else. And we had our 2 nd on the way.
He started about me seeing other people after he moved out and I slept with someone else then dated someone. How that didn’t say much about me. Yeah you know what I did have a “friend” for a short time and then I met some one and had a relationship. I don’t see anything wrong with that at all. He knew I was done he had his chance to fix things and keep us together. I went to counselling with him and everything else. There was nothing left. Dose he really think that if I really had feelings for him that in the last 3 years I wouldn’t have given him another chance or at least fucked him once in a while since I’m not seeing anyone else. Hell why not he is still my husband since he stopped the divorce. How many years dose someone have to not have anything at all to do with you before you realise they really don’t have any feelings or anything for you? I mean really, how many people going to be in the situation that we have been for this long and have nothing to do with them if they had feelings for them? Look how much he tries it be to easy to just say ok. Then he says I miss you, I miss being close to you and being intimate with you. I said yeah that’s what you miss the sex. He said no it’s more than that. Couldn’t come up with anything else that didn’t come back to sex. Like I told him only time he wants to talk to me is when he wants sex. Got to where it was the same when we were together, he come home from work not speak to me all night high how are you, how was your day, how are kids, kiss my ass nothing. But then soon as we were both in bed he pawing all over me and pushing me to have sex.
Then he says how I’m just itching to have the party life and that is all that seems to matter to me. I have no clue what he is talking about there. Anyone I know can tell you I have my kids with me 24/7 and even when they go with him once in a while I am sitting at home doing the same stuff I always do. Once in a great while I may go out. If I go out once or twice a year alone even if just to dinner it is a lot. Because I am always home and doing stuff with the kids.
He started how I was cold hearted and put up a wall with the kids. Because I have been getting onto them and trying to get them back on track. They don’t want to do anything they are told. They don’t want to help around the house and things. He complains about it all the time but dose nothing to try and change it.
Then it was how he don’t feel good and how I attack him for not helping. I had said something earlier in the day about him not paying support or helping make sure the kids have what they need.
Then he started ignoring me and telling me he was sleepy and had to get some sleep and drive the truck. Give me his famous we will talk about it later. Because he didn’t want to answer my questions or hear what I had to say. I said yeah later like every other time you say later. No really we will. Well its been a few days and we haven’t talked yet. I brought it up the other day when I seen him I got the I have to work I need to do this and I’m not avoiding it, excuse after excuse. I said it don’t matter, I just wanted to point out that yet again you say later and later hasn’t come like all the other times you say that didn’t happen.
I said well here I am having my say why your here and you can’t say you didn’t get my message, didn’t understand, wasn’t sure what I was talking about or whatever excuse you may come up with. Because I am going to spell it out make it very clear right now and I am not going to bring it up later I just going to sit and wait and do what I decide to do in the end.
I told him that he has until next Wednesday to get the papers form the court house fill them out and turn them back in. Then he has 15 days from there to get in contact with them and have a court date. He is off next Tuesday and Wednesday so he has two days to get there get them and get them back. Then they tell you to wait at least 10 days to call and get a court date.
I told him if he dose not get the papers turned in to start the 10 process by then I will get a lawyer, if he dose and thinks that is all he is going to do and not have to worry about it and it will slid for ever again he is wrong. Because if it goes past 15 days I will start looking for a lawyer.
I told him it isn’t anyone’s fault but his that he screwed up at work and had 2 or 3 accidents that he is paying for, it isn’t anyone’s fault that he lost his position because of them, that it isn’t anyone’s fault he don’t have his license straight, money to put his truck on the road, pay his own bills, or that he isn’t helping make sure that his kids have the things they need. It isn’t anyone’s fault that but his that he has put us in the position of possibly losing our home again, that it isn’t anyone’s fault he hasn’t followed through with what we agreed upon from day one when we were supposed to split the bills work different shifts and let us both save money get jobs so that we wouldn’t have to pay daycare and so that we both could get our own places. He did the things he did and he did them the way he did for whatever reason and now he has to live with that. That it is time to grow up be a man and quit blaming everything on someone else. I also told him it wasn’t anyone’s fault that he stopped the divorce and has not fixed it like he was supposed to. That is when I told him if he didn’t I was getting a lawyer.
I told him that I am having to take loans and go into debt to make it and slide by because he isn’t doing his part. That if I was going to take out loans to do that then I was going to be taking out extra this time to pay a lawyer to get this done and over with once and for all, that he let this drag out until now we been married well over 12 years. That if I have to pay a lawyer to once again clean up his mess he has made and left for someone else to take care of I was going to see to it that I got paid for doing it. I told him I am going to tell the lawyer I want anything and everything me and the kids are entitled to and the judge will give us. I’m not going to play nice and say just help me make sure the kids have what they need and things are paid or help out here and there when we need it, or just pay child support and forget everything else. I did that and look where it has gotten me.
He didn’t say anything he just had this look on his face like he was stunned that I said it and worried, like he knows I really mean it and going to do it if he don’t get it taken care of. He knows right now I can get the money and if he had to pay for a lawyer he wouldn’t be able to so he would be in court on his own. He knows that his family has had changes in their situations and most likely can’t and would’t help him. Right now I have the upper hand and I plan to use it if he decides to ignore it and hope that it goes away.