Today is one of those times that I have been really pissed off at RC and Father of The Year. I have been dealing with sick kids since last weekend. I have been to the doctors office three times now, the ER and the lab for blood work. Last Monday they all 4 were sick and were seen, only one needed antibiotics, my little one who had double ear infection. Saturday morning/Friday night I ended up in the ER with my Little Guy because he woke up with his ear hurting so bad he was in tears and about to be sick from it. Monday I took the older two in for their physicals, Little Bitty for her recheck and Little Guy to be checked again even though he just been the day before. I don’t know something just kept bothering me about him and I wanted to get him checked by his doctor. Today after I dropped him at school I had to go back to the doctors office because they did not give me the forms for school or the forms for the blood work the doctor wanted. To get to the lab and wait almost two hours because they were packed.

We finally got out of there and got home I call to get the last paper I needed faxed the the childcare place so they can decide my case, it’s and hour wait to talk to someone. When the lady finally called me back she was very rude and refused to help me and fax it because she could not talk to someone at the office. Said she couldn’t fax it unless I was there and someone from there was willing to get on the phone and talk to her. We loaded up and had to go down to the office to get a copy of the letter to take them. While I was there I decided to fill out for a new social security card since he hasn’t had one since I was with RC. I had to go to their office and they make you have the number every time and they kept it that time. I tried to get one before and they wouldn’t give me one said I needed something from the school that his school didn’t even use or know what they were talking about. Today I told them and then the guy ask if I had anything for him for ID, I told him I had his birth certificate, that wasn’t good enough, couldn’t be used for ID. I told him I had his shot paper found both of them and gave him he wouldn’t use either one because they were dated over a year ago. They do not expire I do not have to get a new one every year but they still refused to take it. I finally thought of his forms from the doctor and he took that. He gave me the letter I needed and even made me two copies of it so I could take the one and drop it where I needed to drop it. I ask him to make one he made two so I had extra.

I get home almost 5 pm to get my computer class done and turned in by 1159. I ask Father of the Year to get the kids for dinner so I could work on my school stuff or I wouldn’t get it done. He proceeds to tell me how it was my fault that I didn’t have it done. That if I had been working on it this week I wouldn’t be rushing to get it done. He just went on and on a slue of crap. Tell me how he works and he has to get there every day and on time and make sure the stuff is done right he can’t leave it to the last minute and run there and do it, I need to work on it more. One I work on my school stuff every day at some point for at least a few hours or more. Most nights until I can’t hold my eyes open, I have to put it away and go to sleep. It has just been so much with all this one teacher has wanted from the be gaining that it is all I can do to work on classes before the day they are due or the maybe the day before. But I always make sure I set aside time to get them done. Second, when does he think I should have been working on them between the trips to the doctors, er, lab, to take my mom to the school, shopping, my sister to a few places she had to go, cooking, cleaning, and dealing with sick kids? Oh and don’t forget the three trips I have made to one school, the two trips I have made so far to the other, therapy twice, the child care place, social office and the other places I am sure I am forgetting? I guess I should have my laptop sitting on the steering wheel of the truck hot spot to my phone for internet working on it as I drive down the road, sitting in my lap at the schools working on it while I am trying to talk to them about enrolling the kids, and at the er why they are talking to me about what is wrong and my Little Guy is lying there crying in pain wanting me to comfort him.

Would you look at all these things above, all these places and the stuff done, do you see the two thing it all has in common? Did you guess that I was the only one there doing it, taking care of it and making sure it is all getting done? Did you guess that he wasn’t there for any of it and has no clue what went on, has or hasn’t been done, what needs to be done even though he has been told? If so you guessed right. But I should have this done and not rushing at the last minute to take care of it.

I said something about all that I have been doing and have to do and he says to me. well I can’t just tell them at work sorry I can’t come in until this time or that, or I have to take of by this time to that I can run around and take care of all these things. You don’t work you should be handling it. I said no but I’m going to school and have to have time to get things done and get it in on time. But again it’s only me things I have to get done and can’t not do so it don’t matter. He said no I didn’t say that. I said you just did, I don’t work so I should be taking care of all this stuff even though I have my classes to take care of. You can’t because if your job it’s for me to do and it has to get done. But then you stand here bitching because I ask you to take the kids for dinner so I can get my stuff done. Well I’m just saying that you are home all the time and have time to do it you should get it done. Hello when am I home all the time, I just told you everywhere I have been for days hours at a time. Well at night you should be working on it. I said I do or try to I’m so wore out I pass out. He had the nerve to say something about the few hours of sleep I may get a night. See’s nothing wrong with the fact that he does none of this but I am working my ass off trying to get it all done and trying to keep up with my classes. He goes to work gets off goes home, takes a shower as soon as he walks in the door because he is hot and sweaty from working. God for bid the kids ask him for something or need something. He stomps around and tells them they need to wait he isn’t doing anything for them right now he is getting a shower. Half the time they are just trying to say high or tell him something about his day. But he starts bitching before he even finds out because he thinks he might have to do something. Then he tells them he can’t talk to them right now walks off. But let me even go to the bathroom and change my clothes when I walk in the house and he is bitching why I’m not helping the kids they need this and that and I’ve ran off to my room when there is all this shit that needs to be done. Tonight I was taking pictures of my work with my phone trying to save time writing everything down. He walks by bitching about me texting everyone and talking to everyone about him when I’m the fucking bitch with the problem and who don’t do anything, that’s why I can’t get my work done for texting everyone all the time.

Then bitching the kids this and that and not doing this or that. I said you know last night we came home, they all came right in here and help me make dinner and load the dishwasher. I said Little Guy helped me crack eggs and beat them, poured the milk in them. Little Bitty helped stir them. Big Boy got the bacon all ready and in the pot while big girl made biscuits and helped cook the bacon and eggs why I did other stuff in the kitchen. I said the we sat down ate and watched a move together. I said I went to do homework while they were watching the move but realized I had finished it already for that class. I made the mistake of saying I came back out and finished the movie with the kids. He said you should have been doing your computer homework then. My computer homework is very involved not like the other work I had come to do. It would have taken hours to do and a lot of attention to detail. Where as what I came to do would have taken 20 to 30 minutes to do and not a lot of details. I was tired I fell asleep watching the move but knew I had that little bit of work that had to be in in a little bit and was going to make sure to get it in. It was already close to ten. We finished the move and was in bed in no time after that. I would have never been able to get the work done and would have had to go back today and fixed what I did work on if I had tried to start it last night.

I just can’t wait for the kids to get back in school because I know when they do I will be fine. It’s just getting these few classes done and passing them so I can take all the ones I have lined up to take. I will have 6 hours a day kid free to work on it. Hopefully the few classes won’t be as involved as this one has been. If it is I will probably trade it out for something different. I don’t mind doing the work but when it is just because I’m the teacher and I can make you do this so I am. I don’t have time for that. Many others are starting to talk and complain about the work and things now. I so wish I had it to do over again I would have done things a lot different and would be in a better position if I had. But you just get so caught up in trying to get it all done stay caught up and keep up the other classes.

Him bitching and saying all this shit when he does nothing but go to work and come home to sit just pushed my buttons and pushed me over the edge tonight. It was all I could do not to knock the shit out of him. I am thinking I am doing this for the kids, I don’t mind doing it but I do mind, but it pisses me off when someone does the way he does and says the shit he says. When he does nothing. All I could think was if you were not here bitching right now you be at home or off doing whatever you wanted to do why I am taking care of all this for your three kids. If I didn’t god knows who would or how things would be. This is the way your going to talk to me and act to me. Then I thought of my Little Bitty’s dad and how he isn’t here and does nothing for her don’t even know if she is alive or not. Ok I’m sure he knows because I am sure he is keeping tabs as he always has. But you know what I mean. He is off living life going to work, going out or whatever he wants and not thinking twice about a baby sister, if his kid needs anything or if everything is taken care of for her or not. Just like this one. Before we ever got in the fight when I was telling all that I had done for the kids and school and had left to make sure they all have their spots and things I asked him if he could take the kids Friday night because it’s my friends birthday and she wants to go do something. She can’t drink or anything like that, just go out to dinner play pool or something for a little bit. He says I probably have to work Saturday. I said well you couldn’t come here and stay with them you all can go to bed I be home before you have to go to work. Then you don’t have to get them up and ready and bring them home before you go to work. He got all shitty about that and walked off. But if it was his friend and he wanted to go somewhere he just wouldn’t call or tell the kids anything rather it was his weekend to have them or not he would just go. Mind you he is supposed to have them every other weekend hopefully after this Friday. He is supposed to have them from Friday night to Monday morning and drop them at school. He isn’t going to be able to do it because he has to be at work at 7 and they don’t go to school until 8:20 and 9. So if they are lucky he will have them from Friday sometime until Sunday afternoon he will be trying to pound them off so he can do what he wants to do. He won’t even keep them until that evening or until after dinner. He never did before. He get them Saturday sometimes Friday and the be calling to bring them home about the time they got up ate and got dressed. If he dose I will go back and have the child support changed since they will only be staying about 50 days out of 365 in stead of 80 like he put in the paperwork.

I better get off here it is after 3 i got to get some sleep. So I can get up tomorrow and start the mad rush over again.



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