{July 30, 2016}   She Won’t Marry Him

I took my friend to the hospital Thursday night late, she needed to go I was in the middle of homework that was due that night I knew if I stopped to take her we wouldn’t be back in time. I told her I would take her when I got done if she wanted to go. It wasn’t like she needed to go right that minute or anything just some problems she been having that she had been for but wasn’t getting better. She wasn’t able to go to the doctor for. I figured I be done earlier than I was, I knew we would get back later, but plenty of time for me to get some sleep and things before court. Well it took me a lot longer than I expected to do the paper and we didn’t get there until later, I didn’t get home until after 5. I got an hour or so sleep and at the court house by 9:45.

We were talking on the way over and RC came up. She said I asked him if he ever married Grandma the other night? She said I really didn’t mean to I just put it without thinking.

The girl he is with now is like two years older than me so she is 38 years old. When I seen pictures of her almost 4 years ago I thought she was in her 40’s then. When we split up they got together and he brought her down here and his friends and our friends seen them together they all started asking me how old she was and though she was well into her 40’s. They were all shocked she was only about 33/34 at the time. She his a heavy drinker, into coke and other drugs pretty bad. Then her last old man all but killed her. He tries to say him beating her up so bad is why she looks so old but you can look at her and tell that it is the drugs and drinking. Anyone who has dealt with long term drinkers and addicts knows what it does to the body and how much it can change you.

She said he said Grandma? She said you know the girl your living with the one that looks like a grandma. She said well I had already said it, it was to late to try and cover it up at that point. I said you could have said this or that and covered it up. She said hell I don’t care it’s the truth. She said he laughed and said no she won’t marry him and that he wants to leave and come home, what was the point in being with her if she wasn’t going to marry him. He said but he didn’t know what to do about “His kids” that are there. HIS KIDS? really HIS KIDS. There is only one kid there that is really his kid and he has been with them all this time if things are as bad as he says they are and as bad as everyone can read about and see they are on line he would have no problem going to court and getting custody of her. The others are not his kids, there isn’t a chance of them being his kids. Two of them she had before they ever got together, one is 18 the other is in her 20 with a baby of her own and don’t live there. Then she has the little girl that is theirs and one after her that he wasn’t around for that she had after him and her split up and before they got back in contact and got together, she is about 6 or 7 I think maybe a little older. If it is really that bad for the only other one there that is under age then he needs to report it and let someone check it out and do what needs to be done. I know he may care about her and things but for him to act like he is so worried about this kid that isn’t his after the way he has done with his other 4 just got me. I said to her I would have said your kid she isn’t even yours what about the 4 that really are your you have nothing to do with?

Then she tells him she told him that I was still single!! I said you did what? Why? She said I have been trying to get you to back together all this time even when me and you weren’t talking. She said I make comments about you all the time when he is talking about how bad things are and wanting to leave. She said I told him you weren’t with anyone said he seemed surprised and said really? She told him yeah I was single and hadn’t been seeing anyone. She said he didn’t really say anything after that and got off line.

I was surprised that he was surprised to find that out because I know for a long time even after he left he was talking to someone here that was telling him things and he was still keeping tabs on me. Comments would be made about him and things that he knew or things he said or done that if someone wasn’t talking to him they wouldn’t know and he wouldn’t know. I wondered if it wasn’t someone who worked with Father Of The Year since they both had worked at the same place just not together. Most everyone there knew RC and knew that we had been together and knew that Father of the Year was my ex husband. They had made comments to him off and on that I found to be odd. He didn’t think anything of them but I don’t think he was thinking about the fact that they knew both of them and things. Knowing that they both worked there and that they all knew both of them and knew or knew of me then they seemed a little off. But lots of things have to be spelled out for Father Of The Year or they go right over his head like a speeding bullet.

I don’t even know why it is so important to him that she marries him anyway. We talked about it and he wanted to get married but we had to get things taken care of first and he had to take care of the back child support he was paying before we could. I told him I didn’t want to get married he insisted that he did. I told him that I would marry him but he had to change his last name to mine I wasn’t changing mine again after I got my divorce. He said no way in hell he was doing that. He said it was like buying a motorcycle and riding bitch. I know with us he was worried about all the kids and wanted me to adopt his so we would have needed to be. He was also worried about if something happen to one of us and being able to make decisions for each other if one of us couldn’t for our self and family stepping in and not doing what we would have wanted done. If we were married we could make sure that the other ones wishes were carried out if need be. But like I said we had so much we needed to take care of it was just put on the back burner to be talked bout once we could legally do it if we wanted to and not have any problems. Honestly I was really thinking about it and coming around to the idea. I knew it wasn’t something that we could rush into and felt that in a few years when things were settled down if we were still together at that point and going good I would consider it. After everything that happen with him kind of sealed the deal that I don’t ever want to no matter what anymore.


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