{April 5, 2019}   No Motivation To Write

I don’t know what is wrong with me. The other day I sat down and wrote I don’t know how many post in just a few days. Then we get to the last few days and It has taken me two days to write my last post. I started it Wednesday night, worked on it yesterday a few minutes here and there and finally sat down and finished it today. Not that I didn’t have anything I wanted to write about, I just haven’t been able to keep focused and do it. I am sitting here at work doing nothing and figure I will write like I have the last few days but can’t. I sit here and find everything else to do or just sit here blankly looking at the computer unable to force myself to write.

I just have no motivation, I just want to sleep and can’t stay on track of what I am trying to do. I am also so bored out of my mind I am tired of doing the same old same for days. This is the end of week three of my new job and working all day and all evening. It has been so unbelievably slow at both jobs for the most part that I am just sitting for about 13 hours a day behind a desk in front of a computer. With nothing to do but sit. It is really starting to get to me.

I really need to get on a better sleep and eating track. I am hardly eating and I am starting to feel it. I am not sleeping because I don’t get home until so late then have to wind down and things before I fall a sleep so I’m not sleeping until 3 or 4 in the morning and then up by 7. The weekend we are going and doing stuff, I am getting a little extra sleep but not much. I am so sore from head to toe it isn’t even funny. I just want to cry. I don’t know anymore.

Don’t get me wrong I love my jobs and very glad to have them. I just need to figure out how to balance it all still. It don’t normally take this long but I haven’t been working like this sine I was in my 20’s. I didn’t have kids and all that to take care of and worry about. I feel so old right now it’s not eve funny.

I hope you feel better soon. good sleep is important but I need to take my own advice on that hahaha mine is not good either at mo!

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