I Find It Funny

How do guys meet you and think it’s great that you “aren’t like the rest” But then try their damnedest to get you to screw around with them, or “help” them out.

It’s like okay are you not listening? Do you know how stupid you sound and look? Do I look desperate to you? What is it that makes you think that your so great or special that we just met, started talking or been talking and I am going to just say oh what the hell and do it? Especially when we aren’t even talking a relationship or interested in one. They say they just want to see where it goes, just want to be friends, not looking for a relationship. You tell them what your looking for and they still think your just going to make an expression or change your mind for them.

I know it’s the sliver of hope they have and it’s the fun of trying. But dang, I think I would get tired of trying and feel like an idiot for trying after a while. It never crosses my mind to even keep trying if I know someone really isn’t interested. I guess that’s why guys and women are so different.

As bad as the other one telling me you really aren’t like the rest. But you just don’t get how this works. You need to………….

Yes I know how it works and I have no desire to play that game. I have no need to.

Took Time For Myself

I had not been out in months, probably 4 or more. All my time lately has been at work or out with the kids doing something with them. I was starting to feel irritated and in a bad mood all the time. I didn’t want to be at work, I didn’t want to be at home or around the kids. If you are a parent I am sure you know that feeling when you haven’t had a break and your busy with no time to yourself.

My “friend” messaged me during the week and asked if I wanted to go out for a while. I told him I couldn’t go out until Saturday around 8. I never go out on Saturday but I needed the break and figured that by 8 the kids would be settled. We had plans during the day and I figured I would take them to dinner. By 8 they could settle for the night watch movies and play until they went to bed.

I got home and out around 7 and messaged him to see what he was doing. He said he wasn’t ready he was just starting to get ready. I told him that was fine. I had a few things to take care of to let me know when he was done. I went and put my check in the bank and stopped at the pharmacy. He told me he was ready and asked if I wanted to meet at his house and take his car? So I went over there.

We ended up going up to the pool hall having a few drinks, played some pool and talked. We went back to his place and talked for a while and I was home by 11. But it was a nice relaxing night and a much needed break.

I think I am going to see if others want to go shoot some games of pool or darts maybe once a week or every few weeks. I use to be so good at pool and now I am horrible at it. But I love to play. Darts I have never played out anywhere just at houses but had a lot of fun playing. It be better than going and sitting listening to a bunch of people that can’t sing and eating all the time. I am going to ask around tomorrow see who would be interested in going.

Can’t Offer You More

I have talked about my good friend on here a lot, not to long ago in my post You Prefer People Like Me. We talk a lot and back years ago he told me he liked me he had always liked me but thought I wouldn’t be interested in him back in the day. I had liked him and was interested but I wasn’t one to say anything if they didn’t. This all came up when I was going through my divorce and he was separated from his wife and filing for divorce.

It was never really said as a I’m interested or want anything more now kind of thing. We were just talking about the past how we grew up, when we met back in 3rd grade then losing touch for so long and meeting back up again later on. He said something about liking me and still liking me when we started talking again when we were in like Jr. High and High school. He said he didn’t think I would ever be interested in him or some one like him. He always just watched from a distance. I told him I had been interested in him too. But that he never seemed to be in me so I didn’t think anything of it or to say anything.

We were friends and close when we first met when we were kids. There was a group of 3 or 4 of us that always played together every day and say together at school and things. Then we lost contact for a few years and ended up back at the same schools in Jr. High and High school we were friends but not as close as we had been. We seen each other and talked and things but didn’t hang out as much. Then after we got out of school we started talking more and it just kind of went from there and we have gotten pretty close again as friends. But over the last several years he has made it known he is interested in more. we talk and joke and things. He is that one person that I can tell anything to and go to for anything and if he can will help in anyway. But he is like me he is always busy and most always working.

When I am having a ruff time I will message him and we will get together and talk. even if just for a few minutes. He is the one that came over the night I was upset abut my dad and drank all day. I posted then about A Good Friend. I think that is when I really started talking about him on here.

 

That says it all, when I am having a ruff time I don’t even have to be that bad but he will come over and give me a hug and I can’t help it. It’s like he is that one comfort person that I can just let it all go and be venerable with. No matter what is going on. He don’t judge or make me feel like I am wrong for the way I feel or that it is my fault or that I shouldn’t feel that way. He will say yeah they are assholes or your doing all you can or whatever. He don’t sugar coat things either he will tell me I’m wrong or I’m being a bitch or whatever if I am. But he will help me figure out what is going on and what to do about it or how to handle it. Just let me vent when I need to.

But then he is always making comments about how things are at home and how he caught her cheating or talking to other guys, sending other guys pictures and things. A while back he was talking about divorce and she don’t do anything or take care of the kids and he is worried about them. I know she don’t I have been to their house and seen it. I can’t believe how it is and that she lives that way. I can’t believe he does either but like he said he is working 7 days a week. 12 to 16 hour days over night and then has to come home clean, cook, take care of kids and maybe get a few hours sleep if he is lucky. She works a normal 35 to 40 hour week but don’t cook or anything. I have heard her tell people before when they say something about having 3 or 4 little boys. Being busy and things she says he does it all I just see them a little before they go to bed.

Back in June he is wanting to hook up and hang out and things when I said something about going out and trying to meet someone. I told him he knew that wasn’t what I was looking for and things. He said he knows but that is all he can offer right now and his responsibilities and not just walking away from them. I wouldn’t expect him to do that. But I am not into “hooking” up and “hanging” out either. I want more and need more. Even if I didn’t I am not interested in that with him, not at this time. No mater what things are like an no matter how much I know about the way things are and the way they are with their relationship I am not looking to be in that situation with anyone. There is no doing anything if they are married or seeing someone, with someone. Just not what I am looking for or how I am.

He said it wouldn’t just be hooking up or a cheap whatever. I do have love for you, I just like I said have other things I have to take care of and can’t offer a relationship or what. I told him I can’t. We can be friends we can hangout, go out or what but it can’t be anything more than friends. He says he knows and he understands. Like anyone else we talk, joke around and make comments here and there. But then he sends me things like…….

This  talking about wanting to cook dinner together every night fall asleep together watching tv. wake up to morning sex, late night conversations and traveling the world together.

What am I supposed to say to that? How am I supposed to take that? What is he trying to get me to say? What does he want me to say?

Dose he want me to say go ahead and divorce her so we can be together? That I want him have feelings for him? Want to give this a try and see where it goes? That we will be together forever if he does? That I want the same with him? If not them what does he think sending it is going to accomplish? He already said he can’t offer these things.

To be honest I don’t know that I would want a relationship with him if he wasn’t with her or if they did get divorced. I wouldn’t rush into anything with him just as I wouldn’t and haven’t with anyone. As much as I want more and want a relationship and something that is going to last.

It would be hard because we have known each other for so long, know each other so well and know what each other have been through and where we are coming from. It would be so easy to just say okay lets be together and just do it. But then at the same time getting together in a relationship is a whole different level. We are great as friends but that don’t mean it is going to be great if we are together and going to last. But then you do know each other and know everything it is hard to not just rush into things. It don’t leave much to get to know about each other or what. How do you take it slow when you already know everything?

But I also know we are so much a like we may kill each other if we tried to be more. I think if it ever came to that between us I would be the one talking about lets just see how things go, see what happens. As much as I hate that and hate being told that, with him I think it would be the best approach because I know how he is.

But to get things like that out of no where when your not even thinking about that kind of thing with them and wouldn’t consider it because of circumstances and the things they have said leaves me a little confused.

A Good Man To Help

I was talking to Pops at work yesterday or the day before and we were talking about things with the kids and bills and all that. He said now all you need is a good man to help you.

I just looked at him he said what really. Your doing so good you turned things around and getting ahead. You just need someone to help you now you your going places. But you need a good one.

I laughed I said yeah I don’t think that is out there anymore.

He said it is, it will find you.

I just looked at him again.

He says there are some still left out there, just be patient. It will happen.

I said yeah one day I guess.

I would love to meet someone but I go back and forth if I think I will or not. I don’t I know I do but I tell myself forget it, there are no decent ones out there. But I know there are I do. I look at the people I work with at my two jobs, it’s all guys at both. I look at guys I meet out and about. They are so different, it’s life we all live right around the same area why did they come from why don’t I run into guys like this when I am out and about? What do they all stay home locked up in their houses? I just don’t get it.

 

Men…..Need I Say More

Why is it men feel the need to explain things or clarify things anytime but when you want them to?

I can’t count the number of times this has been said to me.

Why do guys always start off with…..I’m not stalking your page but….

dude if you seen something you like or want to know about just ask. 99% of the time we aren’t going to think anything of it. But when you start off with I’m not… but….you guilty as hell and lying through your teeth 😆 sounding like a 5 year old um I was doing what you told me in the living room but I noticed the cookies on the top shelf in the back of the pantry that’s in the kitchen. Can we have one🤣

For real why do you feel the need to tell me you haven’t been stalking my page if you really haven’t? Telling me you haven’t been seems as if you are feeling guilty. But anyway.

Then yesterday I left my day job and headed to the night job. I followed this little convertible with it’s top down over the bridge. There was a guy driving. When we came off the bridge we ended up right beside each other at the light. He was in the far left lane and I was in the right lane next to him. I never looked at him I was doing something not even thinking about it really and he starts revving it up. I see what he is doing and I decide not to l look and he just keeps on getting louder and louder every time. I never did look over and the light turned green. I went and got over right in front of him. He was so mad he turned off and went the other way. I passed him again a few blocks up the road back on the road we were on to start with and going on.

A car with a dealer licence plate don’t impress me. It has a dealer plate he is either test driving it or probably work there and had to take it to get something looked at or something to go do and slapped the plate on it and went. Even if it didn’t have a dealer tag the look at me, look at my car, look what kind of car I have or I am driving mentality does nothing for me. It takes a lot to impress me and what you have or can buy isn’t going to do it. If they have that mentality of look at me look what I have or can buy the odds are their personality isn’t going to be doing much impressing either.

These guys try way to hard. But I guess that it what they have come to expect that most or a lot of these women want. The whole I’m not stalking your page thing don’t bother me, I just find it really funny because I have had I don’t know how many of them say it to me mid sentience when we are carrying on a normal conversation. Why not just say what was this or that about or that picture was a nice picture?

Like the guy I work with at work asked me how my sons party went last night we talked for a bit. He knew about it from facebook. He didn’t have to stop and say I’m not stalking your page but I seen you had a party over the weekend for your kid. He just ask how the party was and where the park was.

Dating and Pictures

Have you all checked out the facebook dating thing they have going on? It is better than that meet me disaster they had before. I looked at that once for a minute or two and that was more than enough for me.

I seen the other day they have something new simple like them or don’t click and go. You put in a little bit of information about yourself and the what you are looking for. You can answer some other questions about yourself and add pictures.

one of the questions is do you have children and do you care if the other person has children? No big deal I have no problem answering those. I have noticed that a lot of people who say they have children add pictures of their children or of them and their kids. I don’t know what I think of that. I never thought to add pictures of my kids or of me and them. As you all know I keep them out of all that kind of thing. It just seems odd to put pictures of them up on a site that your looking to meet people on. Is that just me or am I being unreasonable?

While we are talking about pictures lets talk about some of these other pictures guys are posting on there. They look like killers, mugshots, or video still shots the cops use when they are looking for someone. Then you have the ones that are half naked or in towels. And is it a rule that you have to have a fish in your picture if you are on one of these things?

I hate the pictures of myself and hate having to put them up there or anywhere really. But if or when I do I am really picky about the ones I put up. I think maybe it is just the area we are in. We still have that really shallow  Dating Pool.  That probably explains it all honestly.

At What Point Do You Trust The

I can’t have kids statement from a guy? I been talking to bff and she met this guy at work (big no no) she has been hanging out with. The other night she stayed at his house. I said she was going to end up pregnant. Was laughing and joking around. She does with me all the time because of my friend and because I did with RC.

She said nope he can’t have kids. I busted up laughing and said you didn’t or don’t believe him do you? She said yeah he said he can’t he….

I stopped her and said yeah you know how many guys say that or how many thought they couldn’t and have kids now? This is the 34 year old she been talking to. I said his ex’s have probably been on birth control. No no he says because of abuse when he was younger he can’t.

I don’t buy it. I am not saying it couldn’t be true. But I feel it is unlikely. That he is just telling her this. Just like they like to say oh this once it won’t happen it will be okay. Or I won’t finish blah blah bullshit. Come on we know how these guys are and when they are younger for sure. He is young maybe he wants kids, maybe he just isn’t worried about if it happens, or it hasn’t yet so he thinks he can’t. There is no way I would trust that at all. But she is and believes it.

I was thinking about it, how do you decide if they are telling the truth or not? How long before you trust them enough that you believe them? Do you want proof from a doctor first? Do you just never trust it or believe it? Unless you just don’t care if you get pregnant? If you don’t believe them how is that going to work if or when the time comes you want to be with them? They aren’t going to want to use anything. Do you get on birth control and not tell them? Refuse to do anything unless you all use something?

I just do not know if I would ever be able to trust someone who said that even if I was with them long term. Unless I knew test were done and heard it from the doctor myself.

I just know for me I am done 100% done and I would be so scared to risk it. I would always be worried about what if. I know it could happen even using something. But I am most the time really careful then too. I track my cycles so I know when I am at risk and how high, I use protection sometimes two forms. They still pullout. Honestly there have been a few times lately I have taken a risk. But to me if something happen it would be my fault because I didn’t do all I should or could of. Where if I just blindly believe a guy who says he can’t have kids and end up pregnant that opens a lot of problems other than just getting pregnant.

What if a girl tells a guy she can’t get pregnant? Should he believe her? How long should or would one wait before they did? Or should they ever or should they want proof?

Because lets face it girls have said it just as much and probably more than guys and a lot of them have done it to trap guys and they did because the guys believed her.

So would your answer be different if it was a women telling a guy she couldn’t get pregnant for whatever reason vs. if it was a guy telling a girl he couldn’t get her pregnant? Why or why not?

I hope you all give your opinion on this because it is something that you hear a lot both ways. I think it will be interesting to see everyones thoughts and the guys vs. girls on this.

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