Birthday Weekend

So this was the weekend of March 2, and 3rd. I started this then didn’t get to finish. I have been so busy Its not even funny.

 

This weekend was the weekend my oldest got her birthday present she has been waiting for. If you remember her birthday is January 30th. She got concert tickets for this past weekend.

The first one was Friday night she has half days that day I let her stay home. We cleaned the truck out, packed the other kids clothes and got ourselves ready. Once the other kids got home we packed them up and took them to my bff’s house. Then we headed out. We had a 100 mile drive ahead of use and got a late start so we hit rush hour traffic.

We got there about an hour before the concert started. We went to the bathroom walked around a little then went in and found our seats. We were a little worried because they were up in the bleachers. But when we went in the other seats were folding chairs on the floor. We were glad we had the ones we did. We could see the stage and the people on it really good.

The show was pretty good, I liked the opening act better than the other. We seen Delyn Scott and Justin Moore. Justin Moore was really good, I would go see him again.

We had talked about sleeping in the truck because we didn’t figure there would be motels. That night we were so cold watching the concert because it was outside. We thought about getting a room but there were none close and they were $100 and up. We decided just to come home sleep, get some warmer clothes and change my shoes. I wore boots but they had a heel and killed my feet with all the walking we did.

We started home and once I got on the highway it was horrible. I could not see the road, i didn’t know what way it curved where it was and the sides of the bridges blinded in with the rest of it. The lines weren’t marked or were wore off, while other areas just had new asfault down. I was so sick, sore and tight by the time we made it home. I just wanted to cry thinking about having to go back and drive home again.

Once I got to lay down I started looking for someone who may want to go with us that could drive back Saturday night when we were done. I couldn’t find anyone. I finally messaged starfish and ask if he was up. He was, It was close to 2 am i didn’t think he would be. I asked if he had to work the next day and he said yes. I said oh okay. He asked why, what was wrong. I told him what happen what I was looking for and said I was going to ask if he wanted to go with us and drive home the that night. He said he didn’t know what time he would be off sometimes at noon but then sometimes 5. I told him if he wanted to go let me know when he got to work if he thought he would be off early and could go he said okay.

I never heard from him the next day, I figured he wasn’t getting off until late or just didn’t want to go. But my friend messaged me the next morning early and said she closed her shop and had bought tickets and wanted to go and ride with us. I asked her if she could drive home she said she could. We got ready and picked her up and went. She decided to drive over so she had the feel of the truck she drives a small car and hadn’t driven a truck in a while and with mine’s quirks we figured it be a good idea. I messaged Starfish and told him we were headed out. I guess he thought I meant was he getting off soon because it was close to noon, he said he was still working. I said okay we found someone to go and drive we are on our way over. He said okay and it was left at that.

Later when I got home and picked the kids up the other guy at the shop lives with my friends family the bosses family and he asked why I went when I couldn’t see to drive home the night before. I said because I had someone to drive us home. He said him and starfish was going to get one of them light bars and put on my truck and point it at the grown so I could see to drive. I thought it was odd that he said they were talking bout it. My friend said yeah starfish something I said oh. We were on our way out it was super late so I didn’t say anything. I got home and messaged my friend and ask her what was said and why at at the shop about it and me talking to starfish? She said he asked her at the shop that day if I called or messaged her the night before that I messaged him having a panic attack about not being able to see and things but never said that I asked him to go with us to drive and that was why I messaged him to start with and told him. She said he wasn’t being mean just talking about how to help out and get it fixed for me. I said I just wondered how him and the other guy came to be talking about it how he knew we had talked about it or what.

Over all it was a good weekend my oldest was very happy with the shows and she got to get her picture taken with Cowboy Troy from Big and Rich. It was a stressful weekend for me with everything going on and money wise but I am happy she had a good time and we were able to do it. I would like to take the kids next year but it is something that we could walk in and walk out spending $300 or $400 or more easy with all the food, games, vendors, rides, shows, and everything else they offer.

Excited she got a t shirt from the Big and Rich show and it was a baseball type shirt. She said they had random numbers on the back, the lady just gave her one in her size and when she got it, hers had the number 14 on the back. We went for her 14 th birthday. I am glad it is over and will plan better next time around for sure.

 

Excellence in Academics

My oldest had her award ceremony thing tonight, she got an award for Excellence in Academics. They called the representative from each school up and they talked about each student and then the guy from the scholarship gave them their metal. Most schools had two kids hers just had one this year. Before they did the kids they had each one come up with the teacher and the family they picked for the award they were giving out for that. The teacher at their school got one she got a key chain, they didn’t have a family I was surprised they didn’t have the one girls grandma that we are all friends with she is always helping out and doing things for the school. Not sure if they knew they were doing it or having it or maybe she didn’t want to look like she was picking one of us over the others but I wouldn’t have felt that way at all. There is her or the parent that teaches life skills. I think either one should have gotten it over me or the other few parents that do show up. Some schools did two parents they both could have gotten it.

They said there were 1700 schools that take the scholarship in the state with almost 100,000 kids who get it, they said that the kids that were there tonight were picked out of the 650 kids who were nominated for the awards. It was interesting the way they do it I thought it would have been put together and done a little better than what it was but it was still fun and nice.

13 Years Ago

At this time I was laying in the hospital in labor with my oldest. My water hadn’t broke but it started leaking about dinner time the evening before. I waited awhile before I told anyone and called the midwife. We got to the hospital around 10 pm. The midwife told me on the phone not to expect to stay it was probably not my water. She said bring a bag in case but not to plan to stay. She also told me I couldn’t go to the hospital I wanted to go to like the others had told me I could. She wasn’t to friendly at all when I called and I wasn’t happy to hear she was the one on call when I called in. I took a shower and went over there. They got me in the room, checked me and did some little test. It was my water leaking. Since it was leaking she said I had to stay but I wasn’t really dilated yet. She said we had to hook me up to poticen to get labor started since my water had been broke for all those hours before I came in. I said it was just leaking a little not broke but she said it didn’t matter hospital rules. At the time I really didn’t care to much I just wanted to have this baby and have it over with. She was due in two days and I was ready for her to have been here a week or two before. She wasn’t due until Feb the 2nd and She dropped really low December the 8 th. I was huge and miserable as well. I had went from 108 pounds to 148 pounds. I had never been anywhere near that big in my life. If they were going to make her get out lets do it. I been begging them to do it before now they wouldn’t. I din’t know a lot of things I know now that I knew then or things would not have went the way they did.

They hooked me to the pit and waited for something to happen and it didn’t. They decided they needed to up it every half hour until contractions started. They never really did start good until about 230 am when all of a sudden my water broke. From then on the contractions started and they started hitting hard. Not only that but I started to shake and feel sick after a little bit, I puked up everything I had eaten that day and then some it felt like. After that I still couldn’t stop shaking, I looked like I was having convolutions or something. I was having some contractions but nothing major and not close together really so it wasn’t from that. I really wasn’t in pain just shaking. I asked to talk to the midwife they told me she be in. I asked a few times she never came in. I told them finally I wanted an epidural so they said that she would be in to check me before they gave it because they don’t like to give it to soon but can’t give it to far along either. She never came in, I asked for her again and was told she decided to wait until they put it in to check me so it wouldn’t hurt as bad. I wanted to talk to her before I got it but could not get her in there. I finally just got it without talking to her. They came in to do it and told Father of the Year he had to leave until they were done. I wasn’t happy about that but if that what it took to get it see yeah later. I just wanted to stop shaking. The nurse gave me a pillow and told me to hold it in front of me and bend around it into a ball arching my back and not to move. They said they couldn’t put it in if I was moving. They said they wanted to do it during a contraction it wouldn’t hurt as bad. Fuck that how am I supposed to not move during a contraction? They guy doing it got a little angry with my for moving but the nurse who was with me then was great she said something to him about the way he was acting and because he was getting mad he wanted to get it done and get out of there. It wasn’t even like he been there long or tried a million times and I was just not doing what he was asking. I moved twice and that was because of the contraction. He finally done it between them and it hurt it hurt like hell. But it was in and now I would get some relief from the shaking.

Or so I thought I would get relief from the shaking it didn’t go away and to make matters worse I started itching. Not just a little itch here or there I was itching all over my back and chest. I was scratching like crazy telling Father of the Year to scratch my back and everything. He kept saying he was and it just felt like he was rubbing it not scratching it. I asked them and they said oh no it was normal it was just a reaction but they didn’t have to take it out. I guess he put it in the wrong spot as well because I was numb from about my breast down. Right after they put it in and I got back to my room or they left my room not sure if I left or they came to me but either way I was in my room everyone was gone. In a minute the nurse comes in and starts looking at the print out of the contractions and watching the machine and I could tell something wasn’t right. She said that my contractions were coming on top of each other one after the other they just kept peaking but not dropping. By now I wasn’t feeling anything. They turned the pit down and sat there with me for a little bit and they finally went back to normal. I felt like I had to go to the bathroom every 5 minutes and all I could do now was use the bed pan. They dropped me off of it and almost into the floor because they didn’t have a hold of me good and let go after they got me lifted off the bed and I couldn’t feel my legs or do anything for my self. I hated the feeling from it and wished I had not gotten it because I was still shaking and it just made me itch and maid things worse.

The midwife finally came in at 6.30 told me that I was around 3 cm I wouldn’t have the baby before lunch at least maybe longer. She said they needed to put a catheter in because I wasn’t draining my balder and it was slowing labor. I didn’t want it but she said I needed it blah blah c section blah blah. I said ok fine and let them do it. After she did that and told me a few other things she left my room. In 30 minutes I told Father of the Year I needed to push. He just looked at me, I called for the nurse and she came in I told her I needed to push. She said oh you aren’t that far you were just at 3 a little bit ago you probably just feel like that because of the catheter. I said no I am ready to push where is the midwife? She said oh she left already and the other one isn’t here yet let me check you. She checked me and said oh your right she is right there stop pushing and just wait the other midwife will be here in a little bit and went on getting the room ready and just walking around like nothing. I said um no I have to push she kept saying just breath through it just breath through it. I told her I couldn’t and this went on for about 20 minutes me wanting me to not push. I tried not to but it got bad I told Father of the Year I was pushing he better get over there to catch the baby. He looked at me and kind of chuckled. I said I am not joking I mean it I am pushing now you better get over there. Then he looked horrified and about that time the other midwife came in. I pushed some but by that point with trying not to push and breathing through them and things I lost the urge to push. Then the heart rate dropped and they called for the doctor to be called then in a minute her heart rate dropped again and they yelled that the doctor was to already be called why wasn’t he. He came in he told me I wasn’t pushing right and all this bullshit after they told me not to for so long. The midwife cut me then he cut me again there was still problems. They kept trying the vacuum it kept coming off her head. It was such a horrible delivery I was so tired and felt so bad because of the way the doctor and was treating me and everyone rushing around. I had a really hard time bonding with my baby after all that and everything. It was months and months before I really felt a bond with her.

I finally had her at 756 am just 5 hours after my water broke She was 6 lbs 4 oz and 19 inches long. She was tiny she wore preemie clothes for the first few months. By 4 months old she was 20 lbs and wearing year old clothes.

Today she is a tall, gorgeous, funny and wicked smart 13 year old. I can not believe all that we have been through together in 13 years. In ways it seems like she shouldn’t be this old yet and then thinking about everything it seems like she should be older. Really she is much older and smarter than 13 but she is a really good kid over all.

I hope she had a great day and I can’t wait to surprise her with a party or something.

Yes This Happen Today

Okay so I guess technically yesterday now since it is after midnight. But anyway, I picked my older two up from school and we stopped at the little junk store on the way to the grocery store. My oldest got this nice picture for her wall, it it stone or something good size and heavy so I stopped at home to drop it off before we went on. She gets back in the truck and we head on our way.

She says I think these two boys at my school like me.

I said well that’s good you are making more friends.

She said no not like that, the other way. I think they Like me.

I said oh why do you think that?
She says well one asked me to be his girlfriend and the other told me to my face he liked me.

I said so how old are they? What are they life? What did you say?

She said I told the one I didn’t really want a boyfriend right now. The other I told he was to young anyway.
He said why it was only a two year age difference it wasn’t that much.

Then the 8 year old told him she would be his girlfriend. The little boy told her no.

My daughter says to him why not it’s only a two year age difference she isn’t that young? I about died when she told me she said that to him. I asked what he said.

She said he didn’t say anything just looked at her and went on.

She said that the 14 year old was nice but he has his tongue pierced and has a tattoo.

I asked her if she was sure he was only 14 maybe he was like her brothers Best Friend, just looked young for his age. She said now she knew he was only 14 because of something that happen or said.

So for now she isn’t interested in having a boyfriend. I guess that is a good thing. I am sure if she was in the public school she would probably be trying to find one to fit in. I told her awhile back the boys at church liked her and she didn’t believe me. Maybe she will meet someone she likes there when she decides she wants a boyfriend.

I told my friend about it and what she said about the one having a piercing and tattoo.

She was like OH.

I said really don’t bother me either way.

She was like yeah you say that now just wait and laughed.

Like I told her you know the kids that had piercings, wore the all black and was different than everyone, the ones everyone called the “freaks” were my real friends when I was in high school. I talked to anyone and everyone and everyone rather I knew them or not would come to me with their problems. But when it came down to who I spent my time with sat with at lunch went places with and looked for to talk it was them. Because they didn’t care who you were or how you dressed or didn’t dress or what you did or didn’t do if you liked them and wanted to be friends they were your friends. Most of them were nicer and better than the “normal” kids or whatever you wanted to call them at school. You were you and did you they were them and did them and that was fine everyone didn’t have to be the same or act and dress the same to be friends. They do anything for anyone who needed it rather they were part of the group or not. When it came to drugs and drinking all that there were less of them doing them than the other kids. you all ways here the other kids talking about getting in trouble fights drinking drugs parties the cops coming. It was an every weekend things. Others few used drugs and really got into trouble. The ones who did didn’t care if the others didn’t they didn’t push them into doing them or going out and getting in trouble and things. They didn’t treat you any different or make fun of your or what if you didn’t like the other kids if you weren’t running with their groups all the time and doing the things they were you get picked on and couldn’t hang out with them. It’s crazy it shouldn’t be like that. I said there was much more respect from them toward others and respect among them all for each other.

Piercings don’t bother me and tattoos don’t. 14 yes I feel is a little young for a tattoo but if that is ok with his parents and what he wanted to do then that is not for me to judge. I have a deal with my oldest son, when he is 16 I will take him to get a tattoo. If he still wants the same thing he wanted last year and hasn’t changed his mind. He has another 6 years to think about it and decide if he really still wants it. I am not going to bring it up anymore if he don’t. But if he brings it up and says hey mom remember you said if I still wanted that robot tattoo at 16 you would take me to get it? Then yes I will take him to get it. I figure by 16 he will have friends that will be trying to do them or find someone willing to do it out of their house somewhere if I say no. I much rather him get it somewhere I know everything is done on the up and up it’s all clean. I say if he still wants the same thing because it is there forever if he still wants the same thing then he has thought about it for a very long time he will probably not regret it later. I had wanted a tattoo from the time I was in my teens but never knew what I wanted for sure. I knew I wanted something that had meaning not just to get something just because I wanted a tattoo so I picked something. I also knew that I wanted something done right and by someone who knew what they were doing and I was willing to wait until I had the money to pay for that. It took me until I was 28 to decide what I wanted and get one. But I wouldn’t change it. I am two in and want at least 3 or 4 more.

She was pretty surprised when I said I truly wasn’t worried about her boyfriend and if he had piercing and tattoos. But it is true. Now dealing with her dad and other family is a different story, if she brings someone home like that they will flip. But they will have to get over it. As long as he treats her right and she is happy I will support her and stand up for her. If he don’t treat her right that is a different story all together and I don’t care how they look dress or anything else. But I don’t think I have to worry about her being with anyone who don’t treat her right. She is a pretty strong girl and knows what she wants and don’t want and isn’t going to let no boy tell her what to do or not treat her right she will have him hitting the road so fast his head would spin. She is not scared to fight back so I feel sorry if one ever hit or tried to hit her. Then he would have to deal with me.

They don’t know it but I will be working at the school in the next few weeks helping out. One of the staff is having an operation on her back and they need someone to fill in for her and someone to come in and do a few other things. I will have to get a look at this boy and see what he is like in case she changes her mind. I am wondering if he was the one who answered the door one day they forgot something in the truck and dropped it off. I though he was older but he could have been 14. He seems like the type that would be like she said.

Boy seems like we are doing everything all at once here. I just took her and bought her a bra a few weeks ago and a razor to shave her underarms. I have asked her and asked her off and on for almost a year now if she needed to shave her underarms and she has told me no no no. She was trying on bras and needed me to look at something I walked in the fitting room and about died. I couldn’t believe her underarms. We went and got a razor for her to start using. Then the other week something was said and I said something to my sister about it and she said oh yeah her little girl told her a long time ago about her having hair under her arms and that granny knew. I said why didn’t anyone tell me? I guess her little girl thought it was pretty bad too and they thought I wasn’t letting her shave. I do not go in the bathroom when she is showering or in the room when she is getting dressed. I guess she changed clothes at my moms or whatever gown she wears at my moms they could see it. I told her I wouldn’t do legs yet because you can’t even see hair on them and if she starts now she will have to do it rather she likes it or not or not be able to wear shorts once she starts. I wish I had never done mine or not when I did. Now I have to do them if I want to wear shorts or a dress. It isn’t very thick but it is dark and grows all funny. I hate shaving because of the way my skin is.

Less Than 30 Days

I have less than 30 days to have some kind of schooling arrangements for my kids all their supplies bought and everything else they need. No big deal most would say but I have no clue where they will be going to school and I have no clue what they are going to need. I have no clue what schools to even check into. I have one in gifted and one on the spectrum. Finding a school that will take them both and provide what they each need is next to impossible that is any good. I am really trying to avoid driving 50 miles a day to take them to and from school again. I really can’t afford $100 a week in gas I don’t have the time with two other kids and the soon to be 3 therapy appointment’s that I have to make each week for my son. I did it for a year and a half almost two years and it is just to much to keep up with and a ton in gas.

Ad in the fact that I am supposed to be starting back to school when they do and going back to work. I won’t find a sitter to go 50 miles a day to take them back and forth. I won’t be able to take them to and from and it is hard to find a daycare that will pick up at both schools. So then I will have 4 kids scattered between 2 to 3 different daycare. It just don’t work that was a big problem I had before when trying to go back to work. I am not happy with the public schools around us any more. They just all seem to be dropping the ball. The private school’s my son would need are not really doing what they say they will for the kids like him. I have been researching and checking into them. But talking with other parents and the therapist they are advising against most of them. They even say the schools around here are really falling short of what they need to be and should be offering and doing.

The more I look into schools and the more I see and hear talking to others the more I am dreading putting my kids back in school this year. I hate it that they may not be going back I really feel that going to school is important for kids in so many other ways than just the basic books and learning. But I also feel that if they are not being taught or helped in the area’s they need help and they are going to be picked on and bullied that it isn’t good for them. We have already dealt with the being picked on and bullied to an extram with my daughter I can’t go back to that. It is not worth her life to have her in school.

I know it is a lot to take on but I think it is doable if we get the right set up and get all the info and every thing we are going to need. So the search has begun to get any and all info on homeschooling and I still need to go and research some schools just in case. I am mostly worried about cruculume and getting every thing we need set up and getting started. Once we know what we are doing and have everything set up right I think we will do fine. It’s just the stress of not having everything not knowing and being in a time crunch on top of everything that is already going on here right now.

Lice Again

I found that my oldest had lice yet again so I have been treating her hair the last few days. Today my big boy comes to me and says I’m itching will you check my head. I say sure thinking I am going to find nothing. His and his brothers hair is bussed pretty short. Low and behold I find three in his hair. I hold my baby boy down and look at his and find 2 questionable things. They were really tiny so I wasn’t sure if they were or not. I just treated all. We are drying the two tons of stuffed animals they have and washing all the beds. cleaning everything else in the house. Because they sit and lay all over each others beds and play with all the toys and have the run of the house of course.

I am so ready to hold my daughter down and shave her head to get rid of these things. She has them worse than ever and I just can’t seem to get rid of them. She keeps saying now. I told her we could get her a wig but she still says no. She did say we can cut it short into a bob. I really hate to do that and hate bobs but I might have to do it to get rid of the lice once and for all.

We are supposed to go house sit for a friend a few days after school gets out and everything. I have to have them all gone by then so she don’t get them in her house. No one else has caught them from her so far other than the boys. I want to keep it that way.

The schools don’t check for it anymore they say it isn’t a health risk and that the kids can be in school with it. She said the other week the kids were even talking about how bad it was at the school and people getting it. I just pray that I get this scholor ship and can get her in a private school next year. Because this is crazy with her not being able to get rid of it and keep it gone. Just about every month since she started school she has had it.

Birthday Blues

I posted Major Fail  the other week about not doing something for my daughters birthday last year. I wanted to do something fun something nice she would enjoy and could bring her friends along. I decided to call the lady we know with the horses and asked her if she would like to do a birthday party and how much she would charge me. She said yes all the kids were going to get to ride the horses around the big pasture in the front. Then she was going to let birthday girl ride independent in the field and give her more time to ride. Let her show what she has learned and how good she does.

It has been raining here for 3 days and nights now. It was supposed to let up today and it hasn’t. I told father of the year even if it did now it wouldn’t have time to dry out out there. I was going to call when I got down with stuff and ask but when I got to stop for a minute or two she had already sent me a message saying they had to cancel all he riding and lessons and that everything was under water. She said we could come out they could pet the horses and things but wouldn’t be able to ride. But she also offered to do it next weekend I told her ok lets just do it next weekend. I know the kids will love it and have a blast. I want them to have the chance to ride if they want to.

I wasn’t going to tell her what we were doing for her birthday but decided to go ahead and tell her tonight since it got canceled and we have to wait now. She wasn’t as excited about it as I thought she would be. But I know she will love it when she gets there and starts riding again.

Previous Older Entries

%d bloggers like this: