Single___Parent___Life











{February 26, 2021}   652, 623, 618 Still Not Good Enough

Last year around November you may remember I checked on buying a house. They said I needed a 620 or better credit score. Well about a month ago I was going by the place where they sell new trailers and decided to stop in look around and ask all the questions.

I was surprised she said I should have no problem getting a place with my income and credit. They had some nice place. All they had on the lot were 3 bedrooms. I asked about bigger places she said 4 was about as big as you wanted to go. Because the rooms start to get small.

I came home and started looking them up and seen them with 5 bedroom 3 bathrooms living room and family room. The rooms were really good size still. I picked out 2 floor plans I liked. She told me that I should take my down payment pay cash for the land and use it as the down payment for the trailer. So I started looking at land. Then I had some questions so I went back the next weekend. This time I talked to a guy. Boy was I glad I stopped in before I bought property.

He answered my questions and showed me the plans I was looking at on the computer told me what 3 bedroom model they were on the lot. Then he said I needed to get everything done right then or very soon so they could get my order in. Because they are on back order until December!!

The women told me I could move in June if I got everything rolling in February. I can’t wait til December. He said if I Wanted to roll part or all the land into fencing I would need a 640. Needless to say I left feeling defeated.

So since my scores were over 620 I decided to call the mortgage guy. Who in November said get it over 620 you can get a house. He basically acts as if I am bothering him and says no I need a 640. I told him I just wanted to buy not build. He said I still needed 640. I didn’t have enough down. I have like $10k down. I hung up and decided I wasn’t going to deal with him. A few days later the guy at work gave me a number to someone who can get me the money and find the house. Do it all like my boss did when I bought my first house.

I called him he said since fucking covid they went up on what they want and I need a 640 for my middle score. I knew it was middle. Mine weren’t close to there. They updated and one shot to 652 the others went up but still 17 points from 640. Then something hit my credit and knocked my other score back to 580 something. Now I am waiting until Sunday when they update again to see if my 623 goes to 640 and my 652 stays. I was even looking for someone to add me as a user on their credit card. If they have had it for a while with no late payments and at around 10% usage it will bust my credit. I wouldn’t need access to the card, nothing would happen to their credit nothing. Once I close they can take me off. If my dad was here I would of had my new house for Christmas.

But with every thing happening around here and what happen Monday. I think I am going to call him I need him to just find me a house to rent. I am going to find out what happens if I get a rental then buy. If my score don’t go up then i can work on it a bit.

Rents are just so high and still going up. Why a trailer seemed good. I would have a bedroom for everyone. Girls would have a bathroom boys would and I would. We would have a family room that could be used for all kinds of things and even a 6th bedroom if we needed. Plus it would be brand new never lived in warranty on everything. I have land. I would have around $140,000 into it. I cant even get a 3 bedroom for that. It would be mine. I could have and do whatever I wanted.

I just don’t know what to do at this point. I had found about 5 or 6 house’s I wanted to look at. The one I really liked was in a really nice area. They were all 4 bedroom 2 or more bath. I made my mind up if I buy it is going to be at least a 4\2. I can’t touch a 5\2. It surprised me what a jump in price for an extra bedroom. I found a 3 bed with a finished garage. It was a two car i could put a few walls and couple doors to make 2 more bedrooms. I liked it but liked the others better. But in the last 2 days all but two of them are gone. I am thinking maybe waiting to see what comes up the next few months too and if prices drop. I don’t know what to do at this point.



{February 26, 2021}   Not Safe Anymore

I get home Monday night and I see flashing lights on the street between me and the school. From where I was I thought they were closer to the stop, where JW’s best friend lives. As I got closer I could tell there was a lot of cops and they were about half way down the street but that was it.

I pull in park and go inside and said something about the police down the other street. They start telling me they called them. My oldest said her and 2nd oldest went to walk the dog and get clothes from the dryer.

She said they were standing in the yard talking and all of a sudden they heard something. Then they heard a car and it came flying by the house. She said she didn’t know how they made the 90 degree turn without wreck. Then they heard a women or girl screaming for help and someone to please help her coming from over where the car came from.

She said they were scared to call the police because of the DCF bullshit but the lady sounded so upset and they knew something was wrong she sounded so bad. So they called and a bunch of police came flying by.

We went on with our night I checked to see if anyone around me was talking about it olives.on line because my friend lives across from JW’s and he post if he see’s things going on or messages me because he knows the kids are here when i work. But he hadn’t posted anything. I took my shower and ate dinner and kind of forgot about it. I was flipping channels and stopped on this one I never watch. I don’t know if I went to do something or why it was on there. Well in a little bit news comes on. The first thing they say is 17 year old shot in my area. Not putting 2 and 2 together for some reason. I look up as they flash a picture and show the street between me and the school. The street JW’s friend lives on. Who has a 17 year old son. I walked out in the living room the kids were freaking out.

Little bitty is pointing to the tv telling me thats at their school. It basically is the back yard butts up to the school its right on other side of the fence. Mr. 10 has his hands around his face\head and asking if that is really by us that close. He is my one with high anxiety. Mr.15 is pacing the kitchen asking if I found a place to move yet and when we can move. Oldest is telling me she should of got the car’s tag number and she seen it they could know who it was.

I told her it was fine she did the right thing. Told them it was a targeted shooting. Trying to calm them down some and hopefully keep them from worrying. Although it’s to to close to home and anything could of happened. But us mom’s we have to try to put our kids fears to rest even if we are sick from it all right? I was thinking they know my kids seen them leaving there what might they come back and do? I don’t think anything really but it’s something to worry about.

Soon as I got done with them I went back to my room and called JW to see if he seen the news. He said no and I told him what was going on. He said I have to go make a call I will call you back. He wanted to check on his friends kid. He couldn’t get him. The next morning all the cars were home. He still couldn’t get him. He finally got in touch with him later in the day. Something was wrong with his phone. But his kids were okay.

Then JW finds out it is the two guys he works with it is their cousin that was shot. I am a little pissed off about it for a few reasons. A while back officers seen a car that matched one they were looking for. It was over in an area about 5 minutes away. There was the driver he picked up a kid and there was one other in the car. Not sure if he was already in or got in too. They backed out started to go and the cops came out told them to stop had guns out. The drive did not stop they told him again. He still kept moving the car after telling him 3 times i think the cop shot it killed the 2 boys in the front seat. Everyone had a fit rallied in the streets everything else. Even boy in backseat of the car said he could hear the cop saying stop.

It was said they had been on tik toc waving guns around and pointing them at people just before this happened this why they were pulling them over.

Then at the funeral some 16 year old had a gun on him dropped it or something. Shot him and another girl at the funeral. Now this with 17 year old in my yard basically scaring my kids.

It pisses me of because 1) kids and parents need to look at who their kids are running with and what they are into. 2) teach them better to start with so they aren’t out here doing this stuff. 3) take it somewhere else not our decent nice areas. 4) I was already moving in the next few months now its asap because my kids don’t feel safe.

My area was a nice area I grew up here running all over. I would walk to the store’s work, shop or hung out. We would go play on the playground at the park. I have been here since 2014 my kids have never done these things. It sucks that now they could it isn’t safe. People like this guy call you friend why him and his family are part of the issue and bring it to your house like this.

This has been my week. Hope your is better. I will fill you in on the house hunting renting\buying mess in another post. Spoiler alert it isn’t going well. But of course not when dose it?



When we left off I told you all the Bitch had called the police so many times about someone being “after” her that they came in the night with dcf. Well I haven’t heard from them since even when I messaged her the next day saying I had questions. I do not think they have an open case the way she said do what I needed to do when she left. And that it was a civil matter I think is the words she said. But I still look for her to show back up unexpected. I figure in March to see if I am moving or have her out of there. I would have thought they would of sent me a letter saying I had an open case or I didn’t have a case but nope nothing. But we don’t really have the most professional staff when it comes to these places.

Don’t get me wrong there are a handful scattered throughout these places and the one’s who work with them most are nice. But at the end of the day they all come from right here with in the county and that says a lot considering the shape of our county. They have “requirements” but mostly end up settling for what they can get.



when I headed to work on Wednesday my truck seem to run a little sluggish. I thought things just needed to even out maybe get air pushed out or what. Then I went to get on 95 it seem to run better. Thursday I had a few issues and chalked it up to a coil pack. But something just didn’t seem right.

Friday rolls around I jump in fire it up start to put my seatbelt on and it spits and dies. I start it and it just sputtered. I backed out it just didn’t want to go. I get going it seem to do a little better. I stop at the light and when it was time to go it did me like it did Monday night. It wouldn’t go. I started to get over all of a sudden it just took off and went.

I got to JW’s house 3 minutes away it sat in the yard ran great. I messaged the one guy and told him something was really wrong this wasn’t right. He called me right away and we talked about it. He said let him call his brother talk to him they come to me figure it out. I told him I thought I could get it to him since it would be easier. He said he would call me back in a few.

He called me and said if I could get it to them that would be great they would meet me there and take care of it. They thought it was the fuel filter. They could get it taken care of pretty fast. Great no problem. I ask JW if he wanted to ride with me it wouldn’t take long. I didn’t want to be alone if I broke down and may need to get it out of the road or something. He said yes of course.

My thought was get it to 95 get it on there and once I got up to speed it would run halfway decent. Then I would have to baby it through town and hopefully get it there. Because it seemed once I got up to 40+ it wasn’t bad like I said.

Boy was my thinking wrong. Very very wrong. I got out there and it just didn’t want to go. Few times it got up to a decent speed and then it would just drop. I ended up pulling over I don’t know how many times. Was driving down the side of the road way to far. But I had to get it there and off 95 before it just wouldn’t go at all like Monday.

I finally get there they get there and they pull the fuel filter out and it was nasty. So me and the one ran up and got a new one. Go back put it in and start it. It still didn’t sound 100% but pretty normal. I figured because one of the coil packs or all need replaced.

They said take it out run it see how it done. The one went up to let us out of the gate. I turned out to go up the street and nothing hardly move sounded horrible. I turned around pulled right back in. The one who let us out was in disbelief. We took it back into the shop. The younger one that has the same truck kept saying he thought the pump was bad. The older one was saying it needed bled some more there was still air in the line. That is what I couldn’t decide was if it just wasn’t getting fuel or if it was sucking air. The younger one said he could hear it all the way back in the shop when I tried to test drive it and it was the pump.

I asked where this one dinner was compared to where we were. If it was close enough to walk to? The older one said he was going to his dad’s to get a tester he would drop us off. So he did he said as soon as we were done call him he would come pick us up.

I had not had a drink yet and hadn’t had my coffee. JW hadn’t either. I was going to pick him up then we go get our coffee. Until the trucked started messing up. I told him we would stop on the way to the shop but when it was so bad I wasn’t stopping no where. As long as it was rolling and going I wasn’t stopping. I was going to get something when we went to get the filter and there cooler was broke. He was getting hungry not feeling good. I was so thirsty and just wanted to sit down for a bit. I felt like I was pushing them to hurry up and figure it out and I wasn’t. I figured give them some time to check it over.

We got lunch and talked for a bit. We left JW wanted to go to the little store. I thought there was one on the corner across from us but it was something else now. I said there is one back the way we came not to far I think. We started walking. It was a lot further than I thought. But I was going to walk back to the shop and we had to pass it to get there. We were about to the store when the older one called.

He said it was the fuel pump they sold us a bad one. He ask if I had the paperwork from where we bought it. I told him where it should be and reminded him we bought it on his dad’s shop account so they should have a record of it. We talked he said everyone was giving him a hard time about taking it back and no one had it in stock. It isn’t something most places have in stock so that was another issue. I couldn’t go to another store because the first one would only trade not refund because of the type of part. He said he found one but it was about 15\20 miles away and the women wasn’t giving him a hard time she was going to just trade it. So they were leaving to get it. Later the younger one said they ask if the gas gage was working and it wasn’t. He told them no it didn’t once they put new one in. They said by that they knew it was a bad pump.

When we were talking he said we needed to find a ride home or somewhere to go because it was going to take them awhile to go get it and get it in and everything done. He said he would bring it to me when they got it done. I had no idea how we were going to get home. He called the guy he works with ask him if I gave him gas money if he could pick us up. Surprisingly he was down where we were at families house. He said he would call us when they were done and pick us up. We were not near any stores of any kind and had past the turn off for the shop so we just kept walking. We could not get in at the shop because the guys were not there it is a gated area. It would be a while before they got back. So we just walked. I kept telling JW at intersections we needed to go east or west to get back to an area where there would be stores and maybe a fast food place or somewhere to get a drink sit and wait. He say we may as well keep going the way we are. It didn’t matter to me much, but I was a little tired of just seeing woods and houses. We finally came up on this one area I said I think the big park is up here. By then he needed to use the bathroom and we still were just around houses. I mapped it in my phone it said it was a mile to the west. He wasn’t sure. I said if we keep going a mile the direction we are or we go a mile this way we are still going the same distance if he don’t call and pick us up first. If we get there you can use the bathroom and we can just sit in one spot and wait. Because at this point we didn’t know if we were walking toward the ones picking us up or away. I just felt we needed to just sit and wait. He said yeah true so we headed to the park.

We finally got there I went to the pavilion and sat down he went to the bathroom. He came out we were talking. And his friend called him said he was on his way asked where we were. He told him he said meet him out front. So we did it is a huge park a bunch of pavilions, camp site’s, rv sites and other stuff. But we were by the front so we walked up to the road. He was there in just a few minutes.

We had walked 3 miles by the time we got to the park. It had only taken us an hour with the stop at the store. We could of gotten further but JW is a extremely slow walker. I would be walking along and relies he was way back behind me. I stop and wait on him to catch up. But in a bit he would be behind again. I try to slow down not leave him. I wasn’t like in a hurry walking fast. I just naturally walk fast. I would wait for him to catch up then hold his hand for a bit to so I didn’t leave him everything else.

They dropped us off at his house. I hung out with him it was about 5 something I think when we got dropped off. I they should be there in an hour or two. I couldn’t find a ride now it is 7 or after. JW said he would give me money for a cab to go home they could bring my truck to my house. I said as soon as I get a ride or call a cab they will call. They should of been done. Something was wrong.

I finally called a cab to go home because it was 7 something. And then he calls and said it was ready his brother (younger) one was bringing it if I could give him a ride home. I told him yes. I was talking to him asked JW to cancel the cab. But he pulled up about that time. I ran out told him so sorry my truck was done I was just calling to cancel. He was nice about it didn’t get mad. I gave him $5 for coming. The ride its self would of probably only been about $8 if that most likely less. Then he would of only got a small amount of that so I thought $5 was fair for him coming out there. No one knew he got it he got to keep it all.

In a little bit he called about my truck again. He said you been through so much with this truck I am just going to follow him to you and take him home. We talked about pay and things. He said $150 should cover what he had into parts and time.

They got there he said everything is brand new. Everything to do with the fuel system should last you as long as you have the truck and then some. You shouldn’t have to ever replace anything to do with it. They replaced lines, clamps, anything you can think of. I gave them another $200 they spent their whole day taking care of it getting it going for me. If it had been a shop they probably wouldn’t of even been open til Monday and then who knows when they would of gotten to it. Days later. They would of charged labor again and they would not of replaced anything. If I had them to it would of been more labor and more for parts. They wanted $600 4 years ago and $200 was the part. I am sure price has went up for labor. They put a mark up on the parts as well. These guess gave them to me for their discounted price they get through their dads shop and charged me very little for doing the job over and the extra work replacing everything else. So for just about $300 maybe a little more they did the first job twice and replaced everything else. That saved me so much money even giving them the extra $50 last night.

They said they would let me know as soon as they can replace the motor mounts to look for them and get them. They are going to try and do it on a Saturday while I work. I may just rent a car for that so they don’t have to rush. My motor is sitting on my oil pan and cracked it.

Sleeping Beauty is going to try to find decent ones at the junk yard. They are dealer parts and $500. I don’t have that and labor to pay right now and it needs done asap.

I could not believe they sold me a bad pump. The younger one told me same happen to him he had to do his twice too. We went to two different stores and it has been awhile since he did his. But a few people with shops have told me they are getting a lot of bad parts lately. I wonder if it is because of covid and so many places closing having less employees or maybe even employees out sick over this. They get bad stuff but not like they did this last year.

I am just so glad they got it done and thankful they did what they did.



As if the truck breaking down and finding out Father of the Year had a stroke wasn’t enough excitement it gets better. I think I told you all right before Thanksgiving about the bitch calling the police and freaking out telling them someone is after her. They have hacked her computer’s, our phones and messing around the house. She was so bad they were ready to baker act her but she didn’t say enough.

Will since then she has called them I don’t know how many times she has called them since. I am being told 21 but I do not think it has been that many unless they are calling when I am at work.

If someone walks by and looks at the house she is calling they are watching her trying to see her. If they pull up sit in the street or park on the side for something she is calling them. If they go flying by or around the house she is calling.

You have to know I sit on a corner lot with a stop on the side of my house and in front. I also live on one of the 3 ways to get in and out. It is off a busy street so a lot of people come and go.

Since I have moved in they will stop at the stop or just before it and text or make a phone call or check their gps or whatever. At least they are not driving and doing it they are stopping and waiting. They will fly down through here and around corners at 50 or 60 you think they are going to flip or roll. But this has all went on since I moved in, in 2014. She says it just started and it don’t matter when it started. The fact is there is nothing going on to call the police over. No one would call but her.

So I get home late Tuesday after they finally get the truck fixed eat and go to bed. About 11\1130 P.M. the dog starts freaking out some one is at my door. I figure she has called them again over something. Then they are calling me out there. A few weeks ago they woke me up called me out there and the cop insisted on me coming out and talking to him. I was already aggravated and tired and I did not want to go outside to talk to him. He kept on he needed to talk to me outside. I went out he was asking me what was going on that night or what. I said I didn’t know I was a sleep. He was asking about other stuff. I was just like I don’t know. You have to ask her. I was short and very annoyed he could tell. He ask me why I was mad or what. I said because I had to get up come out side in the cold and deal with him. That this has nothing to do with me. I don’t want in the middle of it. He said it did have to do with me it’s my house. I said she stays here too she called you not me. I don’t know what is going on I go to work come home eat go about my business, I don’t get into what she is doing. I just say yeah ok or whatever I don’t pay attention really. I don’t care i don’t want to be out here talking to you if I didn’t call you. She did take it up with her. No need to talk to me I have nothing to say. If I feel you need to come out here I will call myself and talk to you when you get here. I am not coming out here anymore if she calls. He said go ahead go in side.

So Tuesday night they are saying the police are here I need to come out there. Before I could say anything they say DCF is with them. Because I was about to tell them I wasn’t coming out. Until they said they were there too.

I go out there there is a social worker there wanting to talk to me. We go outside and she is telling they want to check on the safety of the kids the cops have been called x amount of times and all this. The cops said she seemed extremely upset and things when they first came out. They needed to make sure they were safe not scared there and all this. Ask all their noise questions. Ask where their dad was and all that.

I told her he the older 3 lived about 5 miles away was out of the picture. Had been for almost 4 years. He don’t call see them or pay child support. That little one’s dad seen here one time when she was 3 weeks old and he is in Tennessee somewhere. I told her I had just heard Earlier that morning Father of the year had a stroke and wasn’t in good health.

Then she asked if I had a boyfriend. I thought I just said no. She asked a bunch of other questions, if kids had any medical things, names ages birthdays. What their medical condition was. Had me sign papers to get their medical records and others for them. Then she wanted to talk to my oldest. I called her out there and went inside. They talked to her a bit and then sent her in. I went out she said she needed to talk to my oldest son.

I told her I needed to talk to her a minute about something she asked. She said okay what was wrong. I said you asked if I had a boyfriend. I said I do, but no one here knows at all about him we have been together for about a year. But that I was waiting to tell the kids. Then this covid crap started we just hadn’t told them. I said I didn’t date forever then did for a while. But that I tell the kids I am going with Bff. I said I do not bring men to my house or around my kids bring someone new home all the time. I told her I have known this one most our lives but I still wanted to see how things were going to go. I said I just didn’t want her to ask the kids about him or anything. Because they would be confused or what. She said no that was fine she completely understood.

She talk to the next two and I went out to talk to her see what was going on from there. She said she had to go back talk to her boss and figure out what needed to be done or what. I just looked at her the cops were standing there I said are you going to come back and take my kids or a chance of that? She said why would you say that? I said because you say you have to go talk to her figure out what to do. I said I told you this is what I was going to school for. I know you could walk away from here with them right now if you wanted to. I know you can come and do it tomorrow if she says to. If you can’t decide yourself tonight you must think there is a possibility that you are going to. I said my kids have been through a lot I already told you without their dads here and things. I said we are very close and they are never away from me. If you do that it is going to be detrimental to their mental health. If you walk in out of the blue and take them. I said if you do at all it is not going to be good on them but them not knowing ahead of time is going to be much worse. We talked a little more she went in talked to her.

She said she had to go out call her boss. It was after 2 am then. She was out there for a bit came back in. She said the boss said right now it was a civil matter she would be in touch not a lot they could do but the case is open case she would be back and she was going to talk to the people around me.

So now I am waiting to hear from her. I tried to get a hold of her the next day she has never called me back. I will try again Monday.



{January 1, 2021}   Hello 2021

I hope everyone had a safe and fun new years eve. I hope this year is a much better year for everyone.



All of Mondays fun just kept rolling, right into Tuesday. I wake up to an alert on my phone. I figure it is the one I get every morning and didn’t look. Something said to but I fell back to sleep. Then I wake up at 7 to my phone wringing. And to see the alert came to early to be the one I thought it was. It is Bff calling. I answer to see what she wants.

The guy she is seeing his boss lives across the street from my ex and they cut their yard sometimes. But I guess they aren’t friendly with them. Well they had to stop at the bosses house for something Monday evening. They told her that Father of The Year’s wife came over there and tried her poor me I need whatever you should give me money bullshit. Boss was already not in a good mood and told her where she could go. But when she was giving her “sob story”, she told them he had a stroke about a month before. He wasn’t able to work.

The boss said they have not been seeing the work truck there or them coming and going in it. He also said they had hardly seen him lately and when they do he is walking hunched over with his head down. From what they say pretty slow.

Him having this kind of health problems and could pass a way but no one has contacted my children to let them know. To see if they may want to see him before something happens. I think what is worse is him his self knows what kind of shape he is in and has not bothered to reach out. Tell them and try to change things between them all. Not that I want him back in the picture but you would think going through something like that would make you think about things. But I guess not when you are like him. Just like not telling them their grandma died. I told JW I bet if something happens to him or at whatever point it does, no one will in form my kids and let them know. I will find out from Bff when her man’s boss finds out. That is if they are still living there.

I have decided he has not told my kids I am not going to tell them either. He don’t feel it is important enough to and still don’t want anything to do with them. And he don’t care to know if they are alive and well and have what they need. Why should I tell them and have them upset and worried and they can’t even get updates on him. I do not think the older two will care to much if at all. But Mr.10 now will and will be upset, worry about him and want to go see him. It will trigger his anxiety I am sure. Why do I want to do that to him?

I can’t say I feel sorry for him. Karma you know what they say about her, she is and she has come full force. You know I said before I wish him dead for all that he did to me. Then I said no just crippled where he can’t do for himself would be better. Because she will not take care of him like he needs to be and all he can do is sit and think about all he has done And put me and these kids through. He knows if we were still together and things were good between us he would be taken care of right. He can just think about the bed he had and the one he made for himself.

That all maybe horrible to say but if you have followed me for a while or read old post you will see how bad he was and the things he did to me and my kids.



So Monday I worked my 8 hours and decided to go home. Since I still had about an hour and half until JW was off I decided to take the long way home. There are like 3 different ways I take home depending on my mood and how much time I have. Most nights I go straight up 95 because I leave about 30 minutes before he gets off. It only takes me like 20 minutes or so to get to his job.

Monday night I leave and decide to go the long way around just to waste time. It takes 45 minutes to an hour. I get a few miles from work stop at the light. It turns I go through the intersection. My truck has no power won’t change gear and is hardly rolling. I turned my flashers on and coasted until I could pull off the road. I was in the left lane couldn’t get over. I didn’t even know if I was going to get out of the road. I finally got over in the grass. My passenger side wheels were right on the yellow line. Everytime a car went by my truck would rock. I was scared they were going to hit me.

My truck was still running but sounded horrible and wouldn’t move. Then it shut off. I tried to start it all it would do was turn over. I got out checked the water, oil and transmission fluid. They were fine and I had half tank of gas. But it seemed as if it wasn’t getting gas to the motor. I killed the battery trying to get it started. I called my friend who said to check and see if the shut off for the fuel pump got tripped some how.

I hung up and tried to do that but it is behind the kick panel on the drivers side. I had to open the door on that side and then get tools and take it off. Had I done that my door would of been in the road and I would have as well. I talk to him again and decided it wasn’t that. Because I hadn’t had anyone in there since that morning to of hit it and I had not hit any bumps or anything hard enough to trip it I didn’t feel.

I was talking back and forth with JW and trying to find someone to come help me get it out of the road and check it more see if we could figure it out. I could not get a hold of anyone. So I call AAA and they say they will pick my truck up but not me. I am 25 miles away from home. I can’t get anyone to come help me who is going to come get me. I am in the street there are houses on one side and a pound on the other. It is blocks up a main road then across it and another main road. I hung up and called JW he said they would come get me but they wouldn’t be off for an hour. I figured it would take that long or longer for the tow truck. I hung up called and told them to send the truck.

I was in the truck it was dark the lights were off. I had the hood up and been there an hour. I was looking down talking on the phone and someone starts knocking on my window. I look down this guy is standing there. He started asking what was wrong and stuff. I was talking to the lady he got under the hood started looking. I tried to turn it over show him it was dead. He said is that a tow truck? Hang up cancel it I can fix it get you going. The guy with him told him hush let me finish.

I hung up he said I have the same truck same motor everything for 10 years. I have done all the work rebuilt it everything. Whatever it is I can fix it. He said your ground wire was really lose I could pull it off with my hand. I turned it over tightened it up. We will jump it you will be on your way. I was telling him no I killed it after I got stopped it wasn’t getting fuel. He was saying if it is not grounded it isn’t being charged nothing is going to work right. I said I know but you aren’t understanding. I said jump it we can’t tell anything if you can’t hear what it is doing. So they did. It turns over but don’t start. I said see it isn’t getting fuel and I have half a tank. He climbed up under the hood and started messing with something. He told me get in turn key on and off. He said your right there isn’t any pressure from the fuel pump. He said he couldn’t fix it there on the road like that. He said it is your pump and I can do it in 45 minutes for $200 and you get the part. I checked about getting the pump done in my other truck and they waned $700. He said he could do it the next day after work.

They other guy said if you want to tow it around the corner leave it in my yard you can. He said lock it up and bring the key back when we get home tomorrow. It will save you a bunch on your tow bill. We will fix it as soon as we get off.

I said look I have to go home and see if I can borrow the money because I do not have it. But I have to get it going so I don’t miss work. He said okay we will come to you. Get a hold of us tomorrow let us know.

They were still in front of my truck with cables hooked up when the tow truck got there. They moved and went to leave. I thought about being stuck once they took my truck. I ran over and stop them. I ask if they would take me up the street to the restaurant. I was going to get a drink and wait for JW to get there. It was dark and cool out and I would be off the road. They ask why. I told them because I had to wait for my ride. They said I could go with my truck.

I told him no they said because of covid they were not taking passenger. He said yeah I went over to get my things and wait for the guy to get the truck picked up.

I thought I am going to go get in this van with these two guys I just met. Sure we are only going to the end of the street a few blocks but what if they decide to go somewhere else or do something? I thought of my knife in the door of my truck. I got it and stuck it in my back pocket and covered it with my shirt and jacket. They were in a big work van with the cage and closed up no windows. I thought if I get separated from my purse it is going to do me no good or if I can’t get into it. This way I could just pull it out. Let me just say I did not really think I had anything at all to worry about or I would of never asked or thought about getting in the van with them. But you never know what may happen. I got out of the truck he came over said hunny he will take you with your truck. I said what? He said I talked to him he said they aren’t supposed to but he will. I said okay thank you. He said call him and let him know and made sure i had his number. I put my knife in my purse when no one was around. I figured in the tow truck there is more space between me and him and there was only one of him not two and he was driving too. I could get to it if I needed to. Before I figured if I road to the corner with them or 25 miles with him I didn’t know any of them so not any different really.

The one guy said I would of never stopped but I seen it was an excursion I told him stop turn around we have to go back. He was saying no, no,no. I said go back we have to stop. So he finally turned around. He said I love these trucks. I said me too it is my 2nd one. He said he got his 10 years ago for $10k and it only had 30 some thousand miles on it he is 2nd owner I think he said. 10 years ago with no more miles than that on it they gave him that truck. Just gave it away. He said if it was anything else I would of never stopped. They left and I walked back over to the tow truck. They guy was taking forever. Then he went to pull it up there and i called JW to tell him I was going to ride home with the truck. So he didn’t have to worry about coming all the way down there to pick me up.

I walk back to the front of the truck my truck is still not loaded. The guy has been here while now. He finally says he broke the wench on his truck he has to send another truck. He picks his stuff up and leaves. I am sitting back in the truck waiting and called the part store to see if they had the part and how much it was. They guy ask how my night was?

I said I am sitting on the side of the road because my fuel pump went out. I been here over an hour. The tow truck just left because he broke the truck trying to load mine. He was like damn not a good night.

All of a sudden I see red and blue lights behind me. They looked further away. Then I thought they were right behind me. Before I thought I said oh no it’s the cop’s. He said where? I said right behind me. He said you’re legal right it’s fine.

I said my birthday was Saturday and I forgot to get my tag. I gave him the info he needed got off the phone and out of the truck. The cop was walking up. I told him I was stuck I called AAA what happened when they got there that he just pulled away was sending someone else. Showed him on my phone text AAA sent me. He said call them back ask if I was okay and left. I called them back and sat on hold for what seemed like forever. The other truck came up before they ever came back to the phone. He hooked it up set it all up and we were on our way in no time. I figured out later the other guy tried to pull it up there with out putting it in gear so the wheels would roll. That is why his wench broke. I told you I can’t make this shit up. Who has luck like that?

I ask this guy if he would give me a ride and told him the other driver said he was going to tell him to. That he was going to. He said yes he would. He wasn’t supposed to but he wasn’t going to leave me stuck there on the side of the road. I had him take me to JW house. I stayed there that night. I was going to rent a car and they had none where I normally go. I checked the other place they wanted almost $90. I wouldn’t of even made 90 for the few hours I would of been at work. I had to leave early to get the truck fixed. I ended up calling in. The guys came about 5 the one took me to get the part why the other started on the truck. It took him about 2.5 hours but he got it done. He also replace the battery terminal for me too. I told him I had an oil leak asked if he seen it why he was under there? He said no got under it and looked. In just a second got up and said my motor mounts are wore out it is sitting on the oil pan. He said it is cracked. He said it would take most the day to do it. You have to lift the motor fix the pan replace the mounts put it back together. They said I would need to bring it to their dads shop so they could put it on the lift and could do it easier. I told him that was fine I had no problem doing that. He said let him know when I was ready. We would set something up.

JW said when I broke down his friend had a guy that would fix it. Said he done the breaks and something else for him. Small stuff and that he worked at one of the tow companies before. I said I don’t know about that. I don’t like just anyone messing with my truck. He may be able to do breaks but fuel pump is a lot more involved and can be dangerous if he does something wrong.

He said you are going to let this guy you don’t know do it? I said I know but talking to him watching him messing with it on the side of the road. He knows what he is talking about. What he is doing. He has the same truck done this stuff already to his. He knows what to expect what he needs and all that. I just felt it was ok and there was a reason he came by and stopped when he seen me.

I am waiting for the new year to start so I am not getting short checks. And I can get overtime. I am going to have do the mounts, and a few other things to it for me.



{December 28, 2020}   I Told My Sister

I don’t know if it was Christmas eve or a day or two before, but me and my sister were talking on the phone while shopping. We were calling back and forth having each other look for thing’s we couldn’t find and trying to see what to get each other’s kids.

I don’t know how it came up but I ended up telling her about JW. I just told her I hadn’t told the kids and things yet. I told her we (well I was) were waiting to see how things went if it was going to be something or not. Then this covid crap happen and everything. That I was going to have to tell them soon.

She didn’t seem to sure at first, I told her that January would be a year for us. How he has been there for me and helped me. He got someone to tow me off 95 when I broke down. He got me the Christmas tree last year when I was going to have to go late after work. How he helps anyway he can. How good he is with the kids and wants to do things with them and be that guy in their life. Or that father figure. How he is excited for them to know talks about all he wants to do with them. But he understands why I haven’t told them and he is okay with it.

She wasn’t saying much but I could tell she was thinking. She said but what about this or that I told her. She asked if he had kids. I told her yes they are grown. She said how old is he? I told her only 42 she said oh okay. We talked a little more she seem to think it was good. The way she talked.

Today I called her why we were out to take and drop off the kids gifts and pick up mail. She said come in about an hour they were getting ready to eat. So we stopped by. He got out was helping me get their stuff out and give her. We stood there and talked for about an hour. I told her that I was not renewing my lease and that I was not taking her mother with me. I just told her no one knew yet but I wasn’t going to be staying around here. I wasn’t taking her with me. I told her we were looking at moving up by his kids. I told her rents here are crazy and I can’t afford to live here.

She understood she has been renting the same place longer than I have mine by about 3 years. She is worried they are going to rise her rent or tell her she has to move. She is only paying $825 i think she said. She is in a two bedroom condo. The ones around her are going for $1200. When I told her I could get a decent 3 bedroom house for that in January and now they are getting that for a 2 bedroom condo. That decent 3 bedroom houses are going for $1500 to $1600. She was shocked.

Later I called to see how the kids liked their gifts. And I thought of it ask her what the kids said about JW? They didn’t come out with this covid stuff and her baby and things. We had mask on and stood away from each other. But I said to her they will be asking granny who the guy was with me. She said no she told them and told them it was a secret for now. It should be okay they kept the secret about a new baby until my sister told. I didn’t either so I know she won’t say anything either.

We got there she seen my necklace I went over showed her. She looked then when I got closer she said oh wow that’s, that’s nice where did you get that or who got you that? I told her he got it for me for my birthday. She wasn’t sure what to say. She just looked at him surprised said really? I said yeah. He just smiled. She isn’t use to me having nice things like that unless it was stuff my dad gave me or a few things I got on ebay at a good price. Father of the year never bought me nice things like that. For no longer than we have been together for him to get me something like that. The fact that he could get me something like that and just do it not think anything of it. She had ask me the other night when we were talking if he had a job. I had just told her but she didn’t hear me. I told her yes he works 6 days a week over 60 hours a week. She said oh.

After she met him and we all talked today I think she liked him. I think she wasn’t sure what to think when we were talking the other night. She was young when me and Father of the year got together. She honestly never did like him would not stay if I wasn’t there even if the kids or others were there. I don’t think she ever met RC. She knows how things ended up with that. She don’t know why but when he isn’t around for 8 years what is anyone going to think of someone, you know.

I told him the other night I told her. He said told her what? I told him about him about us. He said really? What did she say? I told him not much really. He said she is going to say something won’t she? I said no she isn’t like that. He said oh okay. He seemed glad I had told her.

I showed her pictures of the cat’s was telling her about them. She asked who’s they were his? I told her no the one was mine. She just laughed. Asked where he was? I told her at his house. That I was kind of living between the two places. He told her I had stayed with him when I wasn’t here they thought I was at Bff’s house. He said yeah 6 or 8 months. I said 2. He was joking around. She seemed to like him. That is good.



{December 28, 2020}   Seen JW Today

I went over to JW’s house like I do every Sunday so we could do what we needed to do. He was just getting dressed when I got there. He said he was about to walk up to the little store to get coffee. He finished getting dressed said he had been up for a few hours. It was 11 something when I got there. I would of went earlier but normally he likes to sleep in and is still laying down when I get there at 11. He said the cats ran all over him and woke him up. He fell a sleep on the couch.

We got his stuff together and loaded up. I told him we would toss the stuff in to wash then go get coffee. I was sitting there on the couch and went to get up. He said oh yeah I almost forgot. He picked something up off the table. It was in a black bag. He said he was sorry he didn’t get to wrap it. He was so wore out when he got home the night before I couldn’t blame him. I opened the bag and pulled out what was inside. I sat back down on the couch. I was surprised. I open the box and there was a gold necklace with little diamonds all the way around it. I was very shocked. I took it out and was trying to put it on but couldn’t get it on. He sat beside me and help me put it on.

I wrote Look What I Got back in February. A month or so after we got together. He gave me the heart necklace back then. It was similar it had one side with CZ on it and it was silver in color. You can see a picture in the post. Well I got lectured by Little Bitty about wearing it in the shower. She said I was going to ruin it and mess it up. Well I guess After 11 months of wearing it 24\7 took its toll on it. It started turning and tarnished. I tried to clean it when I was staying with him and I think it made it worse. A week or two a go I took the charm off and put it on my keychain. I didn’t want to mess it up more.

I didn’t even know he noticed, he never said anything about me not wearing it. Today he said he was trying to decide what to get and he was thinking about earrings but didn’t know what I would wear or if I would. He hasn’t seen me wear any. I don’t wear them much. I lost one of the ones the kids gave me I use to wear.

I guess his friend said something about a necklace. He told him I had the one he gave me before but I hadn’t wore it in awhile. The chain kept getting messed up he thought it broke. He said he was going to walk to the shop by work but they were closed. So his friend went to the other one. He told him what to get. He couldn’t go with him because they both couldn’t leave work at the same time. He sent him some pictures he told him what one to get. It is so nice the picture really isn’t a good one. I can’t get a good one with the lighting. I will get a better one tomorrow. But I couldn’t wait to tell you all what he got me.

I will try to post a better picture tomorrow.

After we done laundry we went to the mall. My mom and the kids gave me money for my Birthday. They wanted me to find something. For myself I wanted. I do not normally shop at the mall there aren’t many stores a lot have closed and others are over priced. But I like to shop Sears and JCPenney’s. They have good sales some times. When I was in Penney’s right before Christmas they had some really good deals. I got my mom a $75 purse for $12. It was on sale half price then marked clearance.

I found a really nice sweater for work. It freezes in there almost year round. I wear my jacket but it isn’t comfortable. It is bulky. I had been looking at some at wal mart but they were thin, they had holes coming in them and had hoods on them. They were $15 to $20. I got this one for $25 it was on sale and I used their coupon I found on their site brought to half price. It was $50 to start with it is much nicer than what I had been looking at in the other store.

Again lighting is horrible it is messed up I forgot to buy a new one today.

I had a little bit of money left I wanted to go to this store by the house to see if I could find a outfit, purse shirt or something. It is in a plaza with other stores. As we were going past one he said he wanted to run in this one store why I went to the other he would come find me when he was done. I stopped and let him get out and went on to the other store. He came and found me in a little bit. We walked down to Tractor Supply.

We were walking around in there and he said my Christmas gift was in the truck. He was looking there to see if they had them there or not. He looked around and said no.

By now I am confused because like I said yesterday he wasn’t making since about needing to order but now got them at the other store. I asked him how did he find them if he had looked all over and had to order them? If they were at that store why he didn’t just get them? He said he got different ones or something like that. Oh I said to him he said he was ordering them yesterday why would he buy them now? He said they were different and he was going to order them tomorrow he wanted to look why we were out today.

We got outside he said my gift was in the back of the truck I had to come back there so he could show me What he got. I went to look he got me gnomes. One lights up say’s welcome then one that stands alone. They are cute.

He said he found some at Lowe’s but they had to be ordered. He said one was reading a book one was hunting or had a gun like he was. He said you like guns and to read a gnomes I thought it would be perfect. But they had been to a bunch of places and couldn’t find them they were order only. He was going to order them tomorrow but he had spent more than planned on the necklace so he was hoping to find them somewhere else. Then he found those today. I do like them. He could of just gave me the necklace for my birthday and Christmas he didn’t have to do that. The necklace is very nice and I know cost a little bit. I sure was not thinking that he was looking for gnomes. I can’t believe he remembered something like that and would think to get something like that.

After he gave me the necklace we were talking and I told him he didn’t have to do that or spend that much or something like that. He said you don’t know me very well. I wanted to do it and was able to. I love you.



et cetera
%d bloggers like this: