{August 4, 2015}   At a Lost For Words

The last few days have been unproductive because I have been in so much pain and not feeling good at all. Let me start by saying the last 6 months or more I have had a lot of pain in my lower abdomen, mostly if I bend over sit to long and get up or if one of the kids hug me to hard or lean on me. It will double me over at times when touched. I have next to no insurance and have a horrible time finding a doctor that takes it and if I do I have to wait for 3 or 4 hours to be seen even with an appointment so I just don’t go.

On Sunday evening I went to drop the rent check in the drop box at the office so they would have it when they opened Monday. I got half way there and got so sick and was in so much pain I didn’t even know if I was going to make it home. I felt like I was going to be sick and the pain was as bad or worse than lobar pain. I finally made it home, the sick feeling eased off but the pain was still there. I was able to lay down and sleep so that is what I did. I could have father of the year sit with the kids but had no one to drive me to the hospital I didn’t want to drag the kids in and out to take me pick me up.

Last night I still didn’t feel good and the pain would easy up then get bad again so I had him sit with the kids and took myself. Of course when I got in there they thought it was my appendix so they wanted to do a scan and all that. They gave me this huge cup of stuff to drink to make everything show up better then injected other stuff into my IV and did about 8 scans in the cat scan machine.

They came back and said it wasn’t my appendix at all it looked great. I was happy but not ready for what she told me next. She said they found a tumor in my uterus. She said you can get cyst and fibroids but this is’t like that it is a tumor. But only about 1% end up being cancer or turning into cancer. But you need to follow up for more testing to make sure. But then when I left they put on my paper work that it was a fibroid so I have no idea what is in my uterus.

Then she said your bladder’s outer walls are thickening. She wouldn’t go into much detail and kind of just said it was like that and went on. Where with the uterus she talked about how it wasn’t to much of a risk of cancer and things. Looking it up it don’t look like its good at all.

She did say I have a UTI but when they did my blood count and all that it all showed great and no bad infection. She said she didn’t think I have had it very long and din’t seem to think it was from that.

Now I don’t know what to think since the told me one thing and put something else on the paper about the uterus. I’m worried about all of it seeing as my family has a history of cancer. My grandpa had it all over his body and in his bones when he past. Then with my dad finding out it spreading so quick and him passing so fast. I have to find doctors to see me and hope they can get me in right away because of the way my medical coverage is. I am really just at a loss for words right now.

et cetera
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