Why We Can’t Have Nice Things

Everyday I get into my car since running around with the kids over the weekend all I can think is, this is why we can’t have nice things.

There is tea spilled in my floor and lemon aid in my passenger seat. It smells like sour tea and my jacket needs washed. It isn’t as simple of cleaning the floor and the seat because the seat has a ton of things in it. Well I maybe exaggerating a little, but it seems like it. Seeing as my box of change is dumped in the floor from where something was spilled in it before. The best I could tell it was a bottle of water that was left in there and the lid came off. The bottom of the box got wet and the bottom fell out of it so it is now everywhere. On top of all the other things that they have left down there.

Don’t get me wrong they are great kids they really are, they could be doing so much worse at their ages. None of it was done on purpose. We went to the burger place to eat and they gave everyone to go cups. Mine was sat in the cup holder that had something in it so it didn’t sit like it should of. I thought the cut was one of the kids and they had picked it up when we got back in the car. I guess they didn’t and when we got where we were going I asked for my drink and figured out it was mine that they stuck there and it was now in the floor spilled everywhere.

Then we went inside and since we don’t have that many cup holders Mr. 13 sat his cup in the seat when he got out. Once we came back his seat was soaked. This I found he had split the bottom of his cup some how and it had leaked why we were in the two stores all over the seat. Since the car is so small there was no where else for him to ride, he needed something to sit on. You guessed it that is where my jacket came into play. He folded it up and sat on it. I forgot to  get it inside and toss it in the wash that night with my work things. I don’t get home early enough to do any when I get off. I grabbed a sweat shirt and just noticed it has something on it once I put it on at work. I guess it is stained it don’t normally wear it but around the house to bed or when it is cool. I cook and clean in it. Who knows what I got on it. It is almost 15 years old now that I think about it. I got this when we left for a hurricane when my oldest was less than a year old.

But I can’t help but think this is why we can’t have nice things when I get in the car. I keep having the thought of keeping my truck to run around in and to go to and from work in. Then use the car when me and the kids go places on the weekend and things. Instead of letting them mess it up too. But I got the truck because it is nice and would be a nice, decent, good lasting vehicle for us all. Isn’t that what we get things for or nice things for to use and enjoy? Isn’t that what happens to things when you use them and enjoy them, they get used, damaged, wore out or messed up? That is why we have to replace things after so long right?

What Hand Do You Drive With Random Thought #9

Do you ever have a random thought that your mind latches onto and will not let go? It’s the tiniest thing and meaningless but for whatever reason your mind decides it is as important as the the $100 bill in your pocket. It keeps coming back to it scared your going to lose it or something.

That is what my mind has done this past week. Last week while driving I reach to get something and was driving with my right hand. It felt very awkward and was hard to drive and do what I was trying to do with my left hand.

At that time I thought hum that is odd, I am right handed but drive with my left and it is hard to drive with my right. I wondered why that was and I came to the conclusion that it was just the natural way I had trained myself since I am right handed and use it to do things. If I wanted to do something like grab my drink I would use my right hand leaving the left on the wheel and have just gotten use to it that way. I wondered if it was just me or if others were  the same.

I then went on about the rest of my day not giving it another thought, so I thought. But now since then my brain hasn’t let it go. I think it a dozen times while I am driving. It don’t matter if I am going to the store two blocks up the road or 20 miles to work. It comes up and I think about it over and over again until i get were I am going. Sometimes even while I am where I am going for a bit until I get busy with something else.

How crazy is that? Why is my brain doing this to me over something so meaningless?

So here we go since it is there and I am telling you about it what say you all?

Are you right handed or left handed?

What hand do you drive with?

 

  1. Right handed drive with the right
  2. Right handed drive with the left
  3. Left handed drive with the left
  4. left handed drive with the right

I know we all should be driving with both hands on the wheel but lets be honest we know that we all don’t drive with both hands on the wheel all the time so give us your answer. I find myself driving with both hands more now that I have this new car but I think because it don’t have arm rest like my truck did. I think the arm rest is also part of the reason I drive left handed. But I can remember driving left handed way back when I first started driving thinking about it more even when I didn’t have things to reach for or do. I drove left handed. I remember my aunt talking about how I held the wheel and drove and how awkward it was to her. I held the little part inside the wheel not the wheel its self. I don’t know I drive more like that now in my smaller car as well. But I had a little truck when I first started driving. handled a lot like my car. That is probably why. Okay enough I am rambling now it is random not rambling thought.

Tell us in the comments are you 1, 2, 3 or 4 my weird mind wants to know. Maybe it will drop it and let this thought go once it finds out.

The Storm That Took my Bumper

So Friday I left work two hours early to go to the ssi office, as soon as I went to leave it started pouring. The bridge right by work was backed way up that means an accident most the time. I decided to take the back road to the other side of town to take the other bridge over since it comes out a few miles from where I needed to go.

I got about a quarter of the way down the back road and the street was flooded I thought it was low enough I could get though, other cars were making it. I hit something halfway through. It stopped me at first then I was able to go. I figured it was a tree branch or something, with the rain and the windows fogging up I had a hard time seeing. I could see the cars behind me going around something but still couldn’t tell what it was. But figured it must be a tree or trash or they would of stopped and kept going as well.
I got to the other bridge and ended up sitting there for I don’t know how long because it was all backed up as well don’t know if it was just the weather or what was going on. The rain did end up being worse than I had expected it to be,, so it may have just been that.

I was lucky enough to get to the ssi office just minutes before they locked the door and closed. I left there and decided to go ahead and head to my night job and pick something to eat up on the way because the weather was so bad. I knew it was going to take awhile to get there. I went a few places trying to decide what I wanted to eat but I never got out because it was raining so hard. I ended up going through the drive through and going to work. I grabbed all my stuff and made a run for the door and went in once i got there.

In a little while I went outside to use my phone since it don’t work inside and it had stopped raining for a minute. I walked out and turned to walk over to the car. I will go out and lean against the hood or sit on the edge. The car looked a mess, The front was gone. The first few seconds I was like what the hell happen to my car? What did the guys do to my car? How did they do this? Why? at the same time I went it’s over on the back road. I lost it when I hit whatever it was. I was to far away to go look for it and figured I had already tore it up hitting it and that someone else probably had hit it by now it. It had been hours. I did what I had to do and went back inside.

When I got off I tried calling my sister and asked if she wanted to go with me to look for it. She was busy and her hubby wasn’t there from work yet. I went over to find it in the dark on this little two lane road with next to no street lights.

I thought I knew where it was but wasn’t 100% sure since it was raining and everything. Sure enough I got down in that area and there it was leaning against a street light. I turned around and pulled over so that I didn’t have to get out on the side of the road. I got out and grabbed it and put it in the backseat. I found a plastic piece I wasn’t sure if it was off my car or not so I grabbed it too. In a little bit my sister called and asked if I found it and got it okay. I told her I was on the bridge already headed home.

I messaged my good friend and asked if he was going to be at the shop the next day. He said him or his brother would be there. I said oh good I need someone to out my bumper back on for me. I went over the next morning and his brother was able to put it back on. It is on better than it was to start with probably. I am so glad he was able to put it back on because so much was exposed and I was scared to drive it that something would happen to something and it looked horrible.

I thought everything was alright until I started down to take the dog this morning. Now I feel this thumping under my feet when I start to take off from a stop or slow down and speed up. My friend says it is the cv axle probably. That is going to be another $150 or more. I swear I feel like I am on some kind of bad reality show that I haven’t been informed of. Oh well such is life I guess.

Other SUV’s vs. Mine

It has been hell trying to find another vehical, I have looked in 4 states trying to find something I want or would be happy with. The smaller and newer suv’s I just don’t like. I couldn’t figure out why.

The next one down from mine are nice I have had 2 in the past. But the new motors are horrible. They have problems, expensive to fix if they can be. Bff has had 2 and my friend with the car lot has one he put a ton of money into and still can’t get it fixed.

I figured out with the new suv’s most are smaller, hatchbacks and have one back seat. If it has a 3rd it is right against the back hatch. Even if you do not have the 3rd seat there is next to no cargo room if you don’t put the back seat down. You can’t with kids in the car.

In my truck I have enough room behind my 3rd row I could put a 4th seat back there, so lots of cargo room. I have it without folding seats or taking them out or losing seating. If I need more I can take one or two seats out or fold them and have a ton of cargo room. I have had a washer and drier in my truck and still had room I could put other stuff.

In the new ones I lose 2 to 3 seating space and still don’t have cargo room without folding the seat down again how do you do that if you have kids. I would be happy if I just had room for me all 4 kids and one extra person if they wanted to go.

I decided I would rather have a 4 door F150 or F250 with bench seat in the front and back. Then I would have seating for one extra person and cargo room. Best of all I wouldn’t have to always be putting seats up and down.

But finding a truck with 4 full doors that is in good shape inside and out and decent miles is impossible with the money I am working with. Even another truck like mine with a different motor is hard to find at a decent price and they are 2005 or older since they stop making them.

Everything is trashed or has 200,000 miles or more. Or they are both.

Ford Ranger vs. Ford Taurus

I haven’t been around I have been busy and car shopping. I have looked a lot on line and there is nothing!!! Me and the girls went Saturday all over and there is nothing.

I stopped in to see my friend at the car lot next to where I did bail bonds. He didn’t have anything. We talked for awhile. He said all these states north of us that flooded lost use of a lot of cars and are coming down here to get them and take them up there. Mostly trucks and that is what I am looking for. A little Ranger.

A few others told me the same and that a lot are being snatched up and exported out of the country. They said the ones they can get they would pay more than what they could sell them for.

Mr. Auto finally met me today to show me the car he picked up. It is a Ford Taurus of all things. It is the ses I think it said. I know Ford cars are known to have nothing but issues. I test drove it with the kids. The little ones were not sure what to think. They never been in a car really. But they like it. Oldest said she liked it better than the Ranger we seen Saturday. It is nicer, its newer and of course has more room, it is just a base line truck vs. a newer loaded car. We know that all don’t always mean anything but kids just see “nice”.

Mr. 8 says well it is nice, it needs 2 tires, it has air, the windows work, the breaks work, it goes, it’s nice I guess. He didn’t see the Ranger he didn’t go with us. He said if it didn’t need tires we should probably get it if he is selling it cheap. I told him he was putting two tires on it before I bought it. He said okay I guess we should get it and get a truck later.

Oldest wants to get it and says it has more room than the truck it is nicer. But she don’t get we are not worried about room because it is not going to be the car/truck that they are all in most the time. We are going to have a family vehicle.

My friend J’s hubby said it seems the best of what I have seen and found so far if I have to pick out of something that I have seen and get it right now. He said get it keep it until school gets ready to start back and unload it because so many people are going to be looking for cars for their kids and thing to go back to school. Get it for $1500 sell it for double. But I talked to more people the last few days and they all say stay away from it far away from it don’t touch it. I feel the same way, from the time I seen it but was thinking hum maybe, but it just don’t sit right with me I think I am going to leave it alone.

Sunday when I stopped and talk to my grandpa, my aunt told me about an auction that two people she knew went to and both bought really nice cars for $400 and like $1500 I think. They were nice newer good shape lower mileage cars.

Of course this got me to thinking and I decided to look it up and see what this was all about. I found it. It is north of me up where my dad lived but it isn’t far from me. They have their list of everything they are going to be selling and the next one is this Saturday. They don’t really have anything that I am looking for as of yet. But two things caught my eye. Two police Crown Vic’s. One is a 2009 with like 128,800 miles while the other is a 2007 with 140,000 miles on it. The light bulb went on, these are cars that are popular in my area. If I could get them for $400 like she said her friend got hers for or even if I paid $1000 each for them, I could turn around and sell them for no less than $4000 each probably. Make a profit of $6000 to $7000 and have the money I started with back to go get my little truck and take the profit and get my family truck. Then take what I have of my tax money left after paying everyone back and go to the next one and try to find a few more to sell. They have travel trailers, lawn mowers, 0 turns, trucks, cars, property even. If I could get a few and flip them That would help me get on top and money in the bank quick. Right now I want the two police cars and hope that no one shows up and bids against me. I will tag one and drive it. I will just drive it until it sells. I am going to keep my truck so that I can go back to it until I get something to replace it or get my little truck I am looking for. This would work so well for me.

I am supposed to go look at a little Ranger tomorrow but I don’t think I am going to want it, it is older and has kind of high miles. I but I am going to go talk to the guy and look at it, see how good it has been taken care of and things. I don’t have my money yet so I will just tell him I don’t have my money I am looking and that I will let him know. I have to tell Mr. Auto to go ahead and list his and try to sell it I am going to have to pass because I just don’t think it is a good idea like they are saying.

Are You Really Functioning If……Random Thought 7

Sitting here at work thinking about and for some reason a flood of three conversations that were had here at work came rushing into my thoughts out of no where. One me and Pops had maybe the same day or just a day or two before the other two. They were had on the same day. Me and Pops was talking about different people being on drugs and things like that. His daughter has a problem too. We were talking about how they think they have everyone fooled and no one knows they work and do this or that and that they are functioning addicts.

The other was a conversation that me and Bff had one day I was here at work, I was talking to her on the phone. The guys were here and they heard me tell her that who and what we were talking about I didn’t even want to talk about because it just made me to mad and that I didn’t want to see that person or talk to her if I did it wouldn’t be good.

Later we were here and the one ask me about it and if everything was alright or what. I told him yes it was just this girl that we knew and how she was doing her kid and can’t or don’t take care of him dumps him and things like that. He asked me who she was he said it sounded like someone he knew of going through the same thing with a baby. I told him he said no her name is whatever but she is having same kind of problem or what.

For some reason these three conversations all came flooding back to me just now sitting here. I thought yeah because they are functioning addicts. Then I had the though are they really functioning addicts if all they have going for them is they have a job? How functioning does one have to be to be considered functioning or low or far gone does one have to be before they are just considered addicts?

I mean if you have a job but that is all you have, other than that your sleeping on couches and staying here and there or where ever. Are you really functioning?

The other I don’t know what you would consider her, she isn’t even functioning if you ask me. She can’t keep a job, always fighting with her family and getting kicked out, this guy in and out and running around with this one and that one. The only thing she has is she tries to play mom and fails horribly at that.

Then you have the other who works but I don’t know how much or how good she is at keeping a job. But she is on and off with her boyfriend all the time and dragging people in and out of her parents house all the time. She takes care of them and things so she is functioning more than the other two probably, maybe. I don’t know her good enough to make any kind of call really I have only met her once or twice I think. Just what I was told during conversations here and there.

So what is the difference in functioning addict and an addict?

I Messaged Him

Edited to fix what I said to him. Because for some reason it posted the wrong thing.

When I got off work I decided to go ahead and message him. I didn’t want to while I was at work because I wanted to be able to respond if he did. I didn’t yesterday because I was pulling in work it was swamped and it was all I could do to function much less think and respond to him.

I pretty much just said what I wrote in my other post………You know what why you want to pop off about 20?s i was just asking because I care not trying to start shit. You know what I had been doing the last few days since we got together? Trying to figure out how to get me new vehicles so that I could give you mine and trying to figure out a way for you to start saving money to get your license back. Figure out if i could help you find a different job how I could help you get to it and somewhere you could move to closer so that you weren’t so far away. So I want to thank you and tell you how glad I am you decided you just want to be friends before I spent time making it all happen. Maybe sometimes you should ask questions instead of being so with drawn and popping off about someone wanting to talk or ask questions. I wanted you to ride with me because i wanted to talk to you about all.

I just worded it a little different. I don’t know where he is staying the last few nights or what he is doing. I know if he is home he may not get it until who knows when because of service. If he is staying anywhere else he should of gotten it right away. He said he was going to be staying over here next to me this weekend working for a guy we know. Fixing the house he is moving out of. I don’t know if he still is or if he is there tonight. But he would of gotten it there too.

I don’t really think he will respond to it because there isn’t a lot he can say. Other than not to message him leave him alone or whatever. But it will be something he will think about that will stick with him. Maybe make him think about what he is doing what he is missing out on or what.

Like Bff said what was that comment about his kids? I said yeah I know. I said because he wants it but he is letting everyone get in his ear and in his head and he is self medicating.

I hope this don’t end badly with him what he is doing. I don’t want to see anything happen to him over all this. But if he keeps on I am scared what may happen.

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