Court Round 2 Finally

I have been looking at the clerk’s site and child support enforcement to see when my court date is since they posted last week that they were sending a date in the mail. They have not updated them. That isn’t normal because the clerks site is updated daily and a few times a day most the time. Anytime something is done someone is updating it.

I contacted child support yesterday evening before I left to go to my other job when I could finally get through. They said that my court date is Feb the 26th at 8:30 am. I am dreading going, I have been since I seen it said they had set one and sent the letter. I hate the way I felt when I seen father of the Year last year. I don’t want to feel that way again. Bff says she will go with me but she said that last time too and didn’t. I am thinking about asking my friend I have been hanging out with if he would go with me. He knows it is coming up and that I am dreading going. I told him how it was last time.

I also asked them to check on the case with R.C because that was done back in October and they have done nothing with it since then. They said they are not sure why something wasn’t done they are waiting on a court date. She said she is going to send a paper over to the lawyer or courts and have the look into it. So hopefully they will get that going and we will go with in the next month or so as well.

Father of the year is over $3900 behind I don’t know who will give him that much money to get him out of it this time. As much as it would be nice to have the money I kind of would like to see him do some time for it this time. Maybe he will see that if he don’t pay it this will really happen. The threat wasn’t enough to make him keep paying. He figures oh well I will just borrow the money or what once it gets to that point. But maybe if he had to do time because he couldn’t get it then he would think hay maybe I should just pay it before it gets so out of hand and I can’t get the money. Probably not but wishful thinking. If he is borrowing this from his boss and his boss is taking it back weekly out of his pay check then it is taking weeks, well months to pay back. What is the difference if he just pays it to me every week and it not get so far behind and his kids have what they need. Would be much easier than not paying it, having to go to court, scramble for the money and risk going to jail or going and having to spend who knows how much time there and now risk losing your job and house and everything you have had given to you. Because we all know he didn’t get it on his own or work to get it. His boss gave him everything and now hopes he works enough to at least pay him every week.

I am going to bring that up to the judge as well why we are in court. I’m going to say to her, can I say something?When she says yes I am going to say I want to ask him some questions. He says he is working he just isn’t paying weekly like he is supposed to. He says he don’t have it to pay and don’t have the $3900 to give today. I would like to know where he is going to get the money from? Assuming he is going to have to borrow it or try to borrow it he is going to then have that to pay back weekly. How does he pay it back weekly once he gets to this point but then says that when he isn’t paying on it he can’t afford to pay me? What is the difference if it comes out and goes to someone else to borrow what he pays me when he gets to this point vs him just paying me weekly and not getting to this point and having to not only now need to pay me but also have to pay that back weekly or monthly?

I am going to also ask if we can’t get this back in court like after him missing two weeks or a months of payments not a year just about. I am going to point out the fact that he is working he admits to working and just not paying it, but that he pays it once they pull him in there and make him so he has the means, can and will just won’t. I hope it all goes well.

$2500 or 60 Days in County

Court went way better than expected, he wasn’t there when I got there he showed up right at time or late. With his fast-food in hand. When I got there they gave me a sheet of paper to fill out. I did it and turned it in. They gave him a book to fill out when he got there. He filled it out then sat there in the hall outside the court room and ate his food. He was wearing old jeans, FLIP FLOPS and a a dresser shirt all wrinkled and un-tucked. His hair is down to his shoulders and looked dirty. While his beard and everything was all nasty looking.

When he came in I happen to be looking that direction we looked right at each other and he looked away quick and looked at the floor and walked by me. He never said two words to me at all sat looking at the floor most the time. But when he walked around the corner and we looked at each other I seen him the adrenaline that went through me was horrible. It was that fight or flight reaction and mine was just fight, fight fight was all I could think. I felt like I was going to puke, I felt like I was going to have a panic attack, and I started shaking it was so bad. I shook the rest of the time I was there for the most part. I did not expect that feeling at all, but I guess it shouldn’t surprise me with all the hell he has put me through. Like before when he would come near me or touch me I would flinch.

He went and checked in and came back with his paperwork to fill out, he went down past me and sat down on the next bench a little bit away from me because the rest were full. A guy came and sat by me, I got up and went to the bathroom and came back, another guy had come up and he sat where I had been sitting. When I walked back up the only place to really sit was on the bench father of the year was on by him or on the other end of the bench almost right against Father of the Year again. I couldn’t make myself go over there and sit down. I looked at the two guys and there was a spot between them, I walked over and sat down between them. There was probably still about a half foot to foot between me and each of them. I couldn’t sit next to father of the year had there only been an inch between each of us. They didn’t want us standing around or on the other other side of the hall.

There were 5 cases in front of us they went by his last name or we would of been like the 2nd ones up. They called us into the court room and I was looking around to see where we were going to sit. Most the time they have a table on either side of the room one for each of the parties that are there. I am sure you all know how a court room is set up. We walked in they had one table across from the judge set up with two chairs. The chairs were so close we would of been touching each other. Again this thought went through my head and that fight went through me. I was thinking I am not going to sit there with him. I can not sit there with him like that. They are going to get mad, they can they can say what they want but I can’t do it. About that time they stopped us and the lady who called us in told me to go up by the judge and sit. In the little witness box I guess they call it. She then told him to go sit at the table across from us.

The judge asked us each to state our names then told us to raise our right hand. I raised mine and I heard her say something. I looked up and she was pointing at him and motioning for him to switch HANDS. He had his left hand raised. When she was motioning for him to switch it took him a few minutes to figure out what she was saying and change it. After that the lady from child support enforcement went over why we were there that he hadn’t been paying or what and that they wanted him to pay $2500 or do 60 days in jail. I wanted to smile and laugh but I didn’t I held it together. I was expecting them to say give her $500 or do a few days in jail so when they said 4x what I was expecting I was floored. But still was 50/50 on how to think it was going to go.

They asked why he hadn’t paid and he said he had gotten behind and was starting to get caught up and wanted to start paying. He wanted a chance to fix things and make it right.

The lady from child support enforcement said got behind you haven’t paid anything at all.

He said he wasn’t making as much as he use to and his wife was sick and had cancer and he was trying to take care of everything and work. The judge looked at him and said you have three kids and they can’t take care of their selves. Whatever is going on you still have to take care of them. You haven’t been paying anything or doing anything for them. What should we do about this or are you going to do to fix this?

He started with his he wanted the courts to give him a chance to get it caught up and work with him and give him sometime.

Other things were said through out the time we were in there I don’t even remember all of it because every time they would say something to him he come off with the something he wants to fix it and make it right.

Then they asked him if he was working he said yes. I was shocked but he also knows I have pictures and things of him working so that is probably why he said yes. Then they asked him how long he had been at his job. He told them about 3 years. That just made him look worse than because he is working and not paying he had said he wasn’t or hadn’t been but he didn’t he said he been there three years. The lady said and you didn’t feel that you should be paying child support all this time and taking care of your children?

He come off with he didn’t know what to do or how to pay it. She said you have a direct order to pay it to her. He said something else she turned around to me and said have you all ever had a conversation about child support and paying?

I said yes we have had a few, I said he told me I’m not paying you anything if you want me to pay or want the support go to child support enforcement and let them handle it. I said I told him that is fine you want it to go through them lets go down there and set it up. I said I told him tell me what day and time you can go I will do what I have to in order to make sure I am there. We can do everything and it will be done you won’t have to worry about it anymore. I said when he seen I was willing to do that it was he didn’t have a ride and he wasn’t doing it if I wanted it to do it myself.

She turned and said something to him they talked a minute. He went back to his can’t afford it was trying to get caught up and things again and not knowing where or how to pay and handle it or what to do about it.

The judge looked at him and said here it says that you got a letter Telling you to start paying child support enforcement making your payments there. Did you not get that letter? He said yes he got that letter. She said so you knew where to pay it.

He said well when I got that letter I didn’t know how much I was supposed to pay or when and how often. I was confused.

The judge said you had an order already in place that tells you how much to pay. You still have to pay that amount.

I said can I say something? She said just a minute and said some more to him. Then said go ahead.

I said he is sitting here saying he didn’t know what to pay, how to pay, that he was worried about not paying through the court or child support or it would be considered a gift and all these excuses about why he didn’t pay. I said he told me to go to child support enforcement and we had the conversation about going there and setting it up. So he knows they are there and what they do. If he had all these questions and he knows he can pay it through them, why didn’t he pick the phone up and ask them his questions or go down there and say I need to pay but I want it to go through you all how do I take care of setting that up or whatever other questions he had? He knows they are a resource to use.

The judge and child support lady just looked at him waiting for him to answer he mumbled I don’t know or something and just sat there looking at the table.

They went back and forth with things again and he was talking about wanting a chance to fix things and pay it and not making enough. The judge said something about going to jail he said he needed to be there for his wife and things her being sick.

I said I have a question. The judge said yes.

I said he keeps saying he isn’t making enough, he isn’t making as much as he use to and things. I said I am a single mom with 4 kids. I said I have no help from family, friends, a boyfriend nothing like that. I said I have to make sure that anything and everything doctors, school, or whatever else comes up with them they get there and I am there to handle it all. I said and I am working 60+ hours a week struggling to get by and hardly get to see my kids.

I said be is a single male who does not see or do anything with or for his kids so he don’t have to worry about anything like that or daycare.

He says he is not making as much as he use to and not making enough to take care of his responsibilities why don’t he go out and get a 2nd or 3rd job so that he can? Like I do on top of taking care of 4 kids on my own. She looked at me smiled and said your right and looked at him to see what he had to say. Of course he didn’t say anything.

I said and while he says he is not making as much why he stop paying. I said he has never paid consistently and has been behind. I said before he cut all contact with the kids the only way I could get him to give me anything most times was to say my lights are going to go off, I don’t have it or my water or I am short on rent. I said I was working and going to school he knew I needed what he was supposed to pay and wouldn’t. I said I would tell him if you do not give me the money and I lose my home I am going to have to take the kids and leave the state. I can’t afford to live here and do it all. I am going to have to go somewhere I have family and help with the kids why I work. I said at that time he did not want that and would give me what little bit to keep things on or pay rent. I said so why he acts like he was paying and something happen he never really has since the order was put in place.

The lady from child support said your honor there is a declaration here showing there is more back pay owed. What we are asking for is just what he is behind since we got involved in November.

The judge said we will come back and take care of that, right now lets take care of this and figure out how we are going to handle this and resolve it.

She looked at him and said something about how to get this taken care of. He said he would like to set up payment arrangements and work on getting it paid off.

The judge said you could of been making payments all along and haven’t this needs taken care of now your kids need this money. So this is how we are going to handle it. It is 9 whatever right now. You have until 12:45 to figure it out. I want you back here at 12:45 and I want you to either have $2500 or be prepared to do 60 days in county. If you do not show back up at 12:45 I will send them to come and get you, so regardless you better be here. She turned looked at me and said you do not have to be back at 12:45, you can call me then and we will let you know if he showed back up and what he decides to do. You all free to go have a nice day. I said thank you and turned told the child support lady thank you.

We walked out of the court room they let him go and stopped me. The ladies said here go in here and get a card and make sure you call in this after noon and see what happen now and smiled.

I went out he was gone. I was kind of glad but also had wanted to see how he got there and who was with him, no one had come in with him. I pulled out went down the street beside the building there he stood beside the back smoking. No cars I knew around no one else around. I just kept going. I got to the end of the street and figured out I wasn’t anywhere near where I thought I was going. I was way out of the way so I had to turn around and go back by. He was still standing there waiting.

I went to the child support office to fill out a paper they said needed done before I went to work so I didn’t have to take off work go down there again. Then went to work.

I was only an hour late for week luckily. I waited until about 1:30 and called the number on the card they gave me. The lady read a bunch of things off just going over what was done that day in court. Then she said and the order for the $2500 purge was paid. I said so he came back and he paid it? She said yes. She said I should have it some time next week. I am guessing mommy and daddy paid it but not sure. I really don’t care. He also has to pay weekly now not monthly or whenever in the month he feels like it. Each week he don’t pay I can contact them to let them know and they will contact him over it. I will not have to deal with him.

They also told everyone before they started all we are here about is money and getting the person who owes to pay. We don’t care if you see your kid or not. If your not go to the other end of the courthouse and file a motion to go in front of a judge for that.

I am going to wait a couple weeks go back to child support and ask them what I can do to get the rest of the back pay he owes me? Will they go after a lump sum like they just did or will they add it to his weekly payment? Because they can take up to like 48% of his pay to give me.

It’s Here, Our Court Date Is Here

It is tomorrow and to be honest my stomach has been in knots and upset since las tnight. I went to my friends after work last night and she hight lighted my hair. To night we are going to cover the gray. I had a large coffee and it didn’t help my stomach at all. My mind is just a fog, I can be thinking of something turn around to write it down and have no clue what I was going to write. Thought of something I wanted to look up on here flipped to the page and its been an hour and I still can’t remeber what it was.

I sat here at work wrote down six legal pages of notes to take with me.

I am dreading tomorrow I hate dealing with this stuff. I’m aggregated I am missing more work and money. I am going alone. I don’t like dealing with him alone. If she is with him I look for her to try and start shit.

The best thing that could happen is they slap him in handcuffs and take him to jail until he pays something. If they do it better not be no piddly little amount. If they made him give me a couple grand it be worth it. I could pay the bitch back get her out of my house.

I am scattered on here I tired stressed and hungry. All I have wanted to do is eat for a week or more. I have just over 45 minutes of work left. I really should be staying here an extra 2 hours the next two nights but I just can’t, I am going to have to next week. Between the truck and now court and everything I need a break.  I told them we are going out tomorrow I don’t want to hear they have no money just get there.

A Long Slow Day

I have had two people come into work today and that is it. I have had two maybe three phone calls. I have made my calls and lined up the other appointment’s we needed for tomorrow. All that took about 15 minutes or less out of the 5 hours I have been here today.

I have spent most the day on here catching up on reading blogs because boy I was way farther behind than I thought on reading. I have written a few post and have a few more I am working on. Right now I am writing this and holding on the phone for child support enforcement to answer. They keep showing that they are sending papers to Father of the Years employer and of course and he is saying he isn’t working there and they show he isn’t earning wages at all right now. Funny he isn’t how is he paying rent and why is he driving a company truck and wearing their shirts? I knew this is what it would come down to, he already said he would do this no big surprise to me. I just hope that when he walks into court they decide to throw him in jail and let him figure out how to get out of that one. Let mommy and daddy or his not boss come off some money and bail him out. Because whatever they have to pay to get him out comes to me. At this point I don’t care who pays it. They all want to take up for him and hide him, lie for him protect him and don’t care about the kids involved then let them pay it.

I am holding with them mostly to find out what is going on with mine and RC’s case because it don’t show any actions have been taken on it. I mailed them paper work back the other day so something should happen soon. I also want to know if they plan to go after Father of the Year or just straight to RC since our divorce papers show that he isn’t the father. That is why I called but I also want to know what is going to happen in court when we go next month since everyone is lying and saying he isn’t working.

Oh joy they should be answering any minute now, they said my wait time is less than 20 minutes and I have been waiting 17.5 so far. I just hope they are helpful and I get some answers. It is always a hit and miss when talking to them rather you will get someone helpful or not. I don’t have time to go down there and take time off work to ask simple questions that I have. Before they wouldn’t tell you anything they tell you to come in they can’t give out information over the phone. Last time they talked to me and gave me information so maybe I will get lucky again. If they don’t want to give me information I am going to ask for a supervisor and tell them just that, I can’t afford to take off work and come down there to ask a couple simple questions and get information or find out why my case is at a stand still and get you all to get on the ball. Someone needs to give me some information and answer my questions.

I still have to go to my other job tonight when I finally get off here. I have to try to get there a few minutes early and talk to the owner. I am going to ask him if I can take off Thursday night. It is Little Bitty’s birthday and I told her we would go to the fair.

I got into it with the Bitch this morning about it. She asked me if I was getting off early for her birthday. I told her I only plan to go to the one job not both. She said why or something. I said because I promised her I would take her and it is her birthday. She says oh so you don’t plan to stay there either? (only 25 minutes and they have answered) You already something, in other words to lazy to do it or not willing to do it. I said no I don’t I plan to keep it and be there for a while.  Then she starts how they aren’t going to like it that I haven’t been there long and I am taking off to take my kid to the fair and blah blah. I don’t think they are really going to care because they are about family  and they know that I am the only one that is there for my kids and that when it comes down to it there are somethings that they come first and I do or have to do. That is why I took this job because it gives me some space to be able to take off and be there for them. It isn’t often and I let them know ahead of time not the last minute. Right now they have the other guy there to cover me. If it is a problem then I would rather find out now than later. Because if it is a problem then maybe I do need to find another job.

Well I talked to child support and they said to bring the pictures I have of Father of The Year working and all that. They also said they had sent payroll forms to 10 different employers that said he isn’t working for them and that they just sent a new one out the 7th of March. I asked if it was his current employer and he said he can’t tell me that. I am the one that sent them the information and told them where he was working and everything but they can’t tell me if they sent him a form and what he said. Got to love these people. I guess to protect their privacy but as far as I am concerned they have none if they are not paying for their kids and doing what they need to be and the employer is covering for them. They said they have not received the papers I mailed back yet but that they give 7 to 10 business days to get it then however long they take to get it into the computer. He said once they get it the next step is to call everyone in for the DNA test. I asked if they are going to call father of the year in or not he said that he hasn’t been ruled out because of the way the judge did the paperwork. He said that they will have to call everyone to court and show that he isn’t. But that right now they are going after RC so hopefully they won’t have to go after Father of The Year. Because the lady told me if they were going to go after him they would go after him not RC until he was proven not to be. So I am hoping that he is out of it now since they are going after RC and they don’t later try to drag him back into it. But I would say if they are going to call RC for DNA test it will show that he is the father they shouldn’t have to call the other one in at all. It’s just one more thing to deal with. I already have to miss work for court, the dna test and court with him. I don’t need to be missing work to go to court or what over something that I already addressed when I should of and now have to go back and fix the judges mistakes.

Well the good news is between being back on here and dealing with child support it is now 4pm and I only have about 50 minutes before I can leave and head to my other job.

Re: Child Support Lawyers, Oh My

A few weeks ago I told you about getting a notice in the mail saying me and my 8 year old had to go to court over child support. They had him listed as the one who owed and needed to come to court.

I spent around 2 hours on the phone trying to get it straight and never got a for sure answer it was taken care of. Just that it was right in their computers they would send the info on.

1. I did not want some bs showing up on him over it all because someone didn’t do their job right.

2. I did not want to go to court and him not show up because he didn’t get a notice with his name on it knowing full well it was mean for him.

I don’t know if he is going to show up or not. I truly wish I had never messed with it. I was just in a mood. I go back and forth on it. Some days it’s like yeah make him pay. Look how my kids are or going through or what. Then I snap back to reality with it is a waste of time. He isn’t going to pay it is just going to be more miss work and money to fight with him to get nothing. I am going to this date see how it all goes then decide from there what to do. I am going to ask if he can just sign up his rights and be done. If not decide where to go from there.

May 15, 2019

Is the day we will be going to court over child support. Well me and Father of The Year. I still have not heard anything about RC and Little Bitty.

I found a paper that said I had an online account now with them. I decided to log on to see if it said what was going on with my case and it sure did.

Everything shows it was just put up this month it shows they sent a letter to irs to take his tax return and it shows we have a court date for May 15. It did show that January something they sent a letter to suspend his license. Then when I clicked on that it says the letter was sent to him on December 21 I think and he had 20 days to pay/respond. It is past the 20 days. I check clerk of court and unless I looked something up wrong they haven’t done it. But it don’t show if he answered or anything either.

It says the motion for contempt was filed and the court date was issued on the 14 of this month. But I think the lawyer can file it and then set the date.

I open mail from yesterday and it was a letter from a lawyer telling me they are with the enforcement office and we have a court date for May 15.

But the paper only has mine and little man’s name on it and has us listed at his address. I am calling them Monday to check on all that. I am going to find out what I need to show to prove he is working as well.

I have text also from his boss to show we talked about what he owed too and him paying. I have pictures and can get more if I have to.

I am going to watch for them to say when his license is suspended and I am sending it to his boss or taking it to him. See how long he has company truck to ride around in then.

Homeless

I was sitting here before work and got a phone call. It was from PeterPans boss. I figured he wanted to meet up to give me the money he got from him. It is not the first but we do not have anymore Friday’s before then. Monday is the first they will be working and things.

Boy was I wrong and shocked. He said he was calling me to let me know he wasn’t able to bring me money because there was none to bring. Says PeterPan has hardly worked this month and what he did take out he came back and got to pay his lights. Told him to tell me to take him to court if I wanted money.

I broke down on the phone right there. Told him thanks for nothing that he promised me that now I was going to be homeless with 4 kids. That I told him my hours had been cut I was counting on this. I told him my bank was over drew to pay my lights and car insurance and that i needed some of that money to pay rent that I had nothing at all now. The people I rent from will not work with me. They do not care. Houses all around me are going for way more they can put me out get $100s more a month. I can not wait for them to file an eviction on me or I will never be able to get something.

He said he is starting to see how he is he didn’t know what to tell me. He said I need to go to court and file against him.

This is to a T what I said would happen. He would take it out but as soon as he said I am short I need it he would give it back. No no it wouldn’t be that way. First payment was $50 short and excuses and now here we are 2nd payment anx I am not even getting that. I do have to say I am a little surprised because I figured he would at least wait until 4 to 6 months in before he did it not to look like an ass. But nope here we are payment number 2 and this is what he has done. Crazy as hell.

I am not sure what we are going to do everything is due this week and I do not have it. I told my mother when I got home and she done nothing but tell me how we need get by until she gets her settlement work something out but not here go get something. Yeah not here because then she can say it is her place everyone do what she says. I told her I was not living with her forever. Then it was how i cant do it on my own never have how much she has paid. If she paid so much i would not be stuck like i am now i have money. Things would not be behind. That I have to do what I have to do even if it means all living together. So kids will have a place.

She done nothing but start shit talk to me like shit since i told her. I am done with her this is not what I need right now. She keeps on what am I going to do blah blah. I told her just foundout nothing is open til monday nothing i can do until then.

I was supposed to go to work this evening for few hours. I have done nothing but cry since I found out. I didn’t go. I been trying to figure out what to do.

My cousins want me to come to GA and NC. I told Bff, I have sat at her house and cried most the day. But I told her I think I am going to call the one in NC tell her what is going on and ask her if I can stay with her if I come there. See if she will help me get places that will help me and the kids and stay until they get things set up. Her and my friend say rents are cheaper and that they have help that will help single parents so they can get back on their feet and do it on their own. She said she gets help with rent lights and water. That she is doing good still next year there is a program that helps you buy a house. She will be able to do that. Even if I didn’t get all the help she gets rents and things are cheaper there. But she has one kid gets a lot of help so I should get some with 4. If I can go there where things are cheaper and get a little help, in 6 months to a year I shouldn’t need help.

Told Bff I am telling my mother me and the kids are going to stay with her. That in December the park said they would have a trailer that I could rent. That until then we will be at bff’s. Because if I tell her I am leaving going there she will pull everything she can to keep me here. She will go to PeterPan to get him to file papers against me to keep me here. Or like she threatens to call DCF she will and then I can’t go until they decide to close the cas and that is 30 days at the least and could be more if they want to play games. She will start i cant go on a trip like that in my truck, i cant go with no money, we can’t make that trip alone, we can’t go up there stay with them what they are or how they are and call every few minutes if we do leave. I told her she has to go by next weekend. That i did too. Im let her go and let her think we are going over there. Then just take off and go. I still am not telling her where we are when she finally finds out. I am going to tell her I am at my friend who moved a few years ago J’s house with her and her husband. They are helping us. I am going to tell Father of the year the same. Because I do not have time to file and go to court right now.

Bff says I need to go get papers singed by him saying I can leave so he can’t pull anything. I don’t even care. If I do I am going to get papers for full custody have them signed. Then file them in court. Then leave and file a paper to do my hearing by phone. When judge ask I am going to tell him, he refuses to pay and I am now homeless. I had no where to go but a tent in the woods like tons of other homeless families down there. I have family here who took us in. So I am supposed to let the court know where i move and if i go out of state so i am. I need you to tell him it is okay so he can not try and make me come back. He signed giving me full custody so there is no reason for him not to. Then I am going to say and why we are at it can you do something about all the child support he owes me? Let him nail him from there.

Either way papers or no papers I am going to let them think I am at J’s house. He will not mess with me there anyway and if he tries to start they will say she didnt get the help she thought she said she was coming back there dont know where she is.

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