Single___Parent___Life











{January 15, 2020}   Back to Back Court Dates

Today I was bored and nothing was going on so I decided to check child support site. I checked my case with RC and it said they issued a court date yesterday.

I looked on their site and it didn’t show. I went to the clerk of courts and it did not come up on there either. The one for father of the year still is not showing up either. I have not received a letter for it.

I went back to the child support case and clicked to chat with someone there. After a million tries I was finally able to. They were kind of rude but finally said court was at 12 in the north court house. We have to be there on 3/2.

I was a little confused because these cases are held in the South court house. But then I remembered that this case has to go infront of the judge to start with because of the DNA and all that. So I guess they handle it in the north court house. I am sure it will end up in the South once it is all done.

The north court house is much closer and easier to get to so I don’t mind. The South one is over 30 miles away and I have to be there at 8:30am. The drive sucks and takes forever with work and school traffic.

I am not worried about the one with RC. I am sure he will probably phone in since he is up there. But even if he wasn’t the thought of seeing him don’t bother me.

But I am dreadding the one with Father of the Year. I do not want to be around him or see him again. I hate that sick panic fight or flight feeling I had once he got there. I think my friend JW is going to go with me. We were talking about it today he said something about he hoped I didn’t feel that way this time or something. I said me too but I figure I will. I was going to ask my friend to go but I have not talk to him in a long time. I think he is mad at me. I said I will suck it up go and find a little spot between two people to sit. That’s what I done before.

He asked when it was I told him. He said he could go with me if I wanted him to. I told him he did not have too but it would be nice that I didn’t want him to get in trouble at work. He said he wouldn’t he wanted to go with me. I hope he can go. I really do not want to be there alone. I don’t know anyone else to ask to go with me. Bff said she would but she did last time then didn’t. She has to have kids to school and things as well I don’t know how she would go.

It’s really nice of him to offer to go with me seeing he has to miss work and pay to do it. I will pay him what he missed once I get the behind amount I’m owed. I know he don’t want it or expect it. But it means a lot to me and I want him to know.

I know it probably sounds stupid that I don’t want to go alone or that I want him to go with me. It’s court, but I can’t help the way I feel. I shouldn’t have to go do this and feel that way while trying to do it. I hardly ever well really never have anyone help me or with me as support. Sometimes we all need that emotional or moral support when we have been through things. Abuse is a huge thing to go through come out of and not have some issues from it. If this is the worst I need help with then I think I am doing really fucking good and proud of myself for working through the bulk of it. I was even considering asking my one boss from my day job to go with me. That is how bad I have been dreading it.



{March 21, 2017}   Ticket Troubles

On top of all the other paperwork and things that got over looked, sat aside or just forgotten about while being sick my ticket from the accident I had on the field trip didn’t get paid. I got a letter in the mail over the weekend saying my licesnse will be suspended April 5th if I do not pay it and turn in paperwork. I finally got a minute to call today because I had some questions about it all. After 15 minutes of holding I finally got to have a two minute conversation with the lady.

My paper says I need to get paperwork showing the ticket is paid and take it to the dmv. I can’t drive to god knows where in this other county to pay this ticket right now and get that paper. I know there is a place here in my county to pay it but how then do I get the paper, I also wanted to know if I could still take the school and get the points off my license or if it was to late.

She said that I can pay the ticket tell them I want to go to school they will give me more time to do the class. She said once I pay the ticket with in 48 hours they contact the DMV and let them know it was paid. She said this put three points on my licese and that they will stay for 3 years. Lot better than I thought, I thought it was more points and that they stayed for 5 or 6 years. I think they use to stay a lot longer than three years. If I take the class and get them off then I think that the ones from the first accident will come off this year or next I have to look into it and see. I am not sure how many that put on them either just that I got some. I ask the lady she said I have to call the DMV to find out how many points I have on there right now and when they will come off. I figure that will be another 30 minute phone call or more with only talking to someone for two. I have to look schools up see how much that is going to cost in addition to the ticket and the late fee they gave me. I hope I can take it all on line and not have to worry about it to much and that it isn’t going to cost an arm and leg to take. I also have to call the insurance company and see if I take the class and get the points off my licence if my rates will go down or not. I just hate all the holding and waiting to talk to someone for two minutes or less. It drives me crazy. I am going to look on the app or on line and see if it says but I don’t think it is going to I will probably have to call. I guess I should go and do that but it is so hard when all I want to do is take a nap. Maybe I will be back later who knows, for now I am off to adult and get things done.



{June 28, 2016}   Missing Paperwork

Today I call the judge to get a court date and the JA tells me we do not have all our paperwork turned it. We need a marital settlement agreement. She says we did not turn one in, I tried telling her that the paperwork says that if we used this other form we did not need that and she insisted we need it anyway because without it the judge don’t know what we agreed to. If they would look at the rest of the papers they would know because it is all in there and if they would take 5 minutes to do their job and know what papers are needed with what papers they would know the other paper takes the place of what she is asking for. But instead of doing their job they force you to fill out and file extra papers. Of course it is not one of the ones that you can fill out online, I have to print it out fill it out. I also have to do a new child support guidelines worksheet because now he is supposed to have this job. It is the only thing I was really worried about holding the case up since we weren’t able to fill it out all the way.

This week is a supper busy week, now I have to fill these out and get a time we both can go back to the court house or somewhere and get it notarized and turned it. If I can get it in tomorrow or the next day then I can get a court date for next Wednesday July the 6. He already said he is not going to come to court if he don’t have to and he will probably be working by then anyhow. He don’t want to have to ask for time off as soon as he starts. My sister said she would watch the kids for me so I can go. I don’t really want to go, I don’t like court rooms. I don’t know why or what it is, I can only think of three times I was ever in one. That was once when my mom was going to court over my sister with my step dad, once for jury duty and the one time I went trying to get this divorce settled. It isn’t like anything is going to happen, the judge is either going to grant it or deny it and tell me what I have to do to get it put through. But I would rather go take a test than go to court. Isn’t that crazy. I guess maybe because I want this done more than anything right now, I have had to do it all myself and get it put through and the last time the judge wasn’t very nice. He was but he wasn’t, he wasn’t happy I did it myself, that I didn’t ask for more and was looking for any reason to not grant it. I guess he is use to seeing these women in there who try and take these guys to the cleaners and I truly don’t care to do that. I just want my divorce, to be free from him and done with when it comes to us from now on. If he pays whatever they say he needs to pay or what that is truly fine with me. So I take him to the cleaners get all this on paper he has to do this, that and the other, it is not worth anything more than the paper it is written on if he don’t pay it or can’t pay it. Then I am back in court fighting to get him to pay it or doing without it just like I would be if I never was given it to start with. I rather not bother with it because i know he can’t pay it. I also have nothing to wear to court really. I guess I will wear my green shirt and see if I can fit into my black slacks or have to wear my black jeans. I just hope we can get this in tomorrow. But I am not sure how I will because I have therapy with one kid, and dentist with two while he takes my sister and her baby to the heart doctor. Tomorrow is the only day the lady is at the court house to do it so I guess we will see what happens.



{February 1, 2014}   Legal Again

After the other day little incident (Go Directly To Jail) that could have turned horribly bad I decided money or not I had to get things fixed today. I told Father of the year he needed to take off take big boy to school and then drive me to the places I needed to go. We went to get the insurance first so I could do my tag and license at the sametime. They wanted a $100 more I didn’t have because of my license. I told him I would go get my license and then come back and he says you can’t because of your tag and not having insurance kind of smug. I said if I turn my tag in I can get my license back without it. Then he tried to tell me well I don’t know about that I don’t think thats going to work. I said no it will because I don’t have to have insurance to drive I just need a license. If I don’t have a tag I don’t need the insurance so therefore I can still get a license. He still acted all rude and said I really don’t know your asking the wrong person. I said no I’m not asking you anything I am telling you I have done it before. I didn’t need a tag so I turned it in and I could keep my license because I didn’t have a tag in my name anymore. Lots of people have a license who don’t have a car and insurance. He says oh well then you can see. I said I will go do it and be back in a little bit. I had to wait for a hour and a half at the tag place to turn it in and get my license fixed. Then I am standing there with my old license, birth certificate, SS card, marriage license and mail from the SS office showing my address. They wouldn’t give me and new license. Said I needed two things with my address to prove it was me. I said with my old one in hand and all this other crap really and I am staying with someone I am homeless so I don’t know how long I will be there  they still refused to. They just took the suspension off and let me keep the old one that is falling apart split in two and peeling all over.

I went got the insurance and then had to go back to the tag office to get my tag back. Thank God the lady gave me a pass that let me go right back to her without waiting in line again for hours. I felt bad there was two guys at her window when I went back and she asked them to sit down and waited on me and got my stuff. I was in and out in just a few minutes. It was just about time to get my big boy at school so we grabbed lunch and got him. Then I said something to father of the year about going to the court house to fix the divorce. He said I got to get to work blah blah. I said ok then when are you taking off next week to do it? He got nasty. Like I told him I want it done so I can move on with my life and I want to move out of this state. I don’t want to move until it is done because I don’t want to start over and I don’t want to have to live there 6 months or a year before I can even file and then jump through their hoops to get it done. I have jumped through them all here it is just getting it back in front of the judge. He said well I have to be there at 4 no later. I said it is going to be 330 by the time we get there and then have to do what we have to do to get it done.  I am not leaving until I have answers and know what I have to do.

He drove down there and we talked to them. The lady there looked through it all and said that we had everything she wasn’t sure why they wanted mediation or other paper work. Then she was able to get into the judges notes and seen that it said we were not in agreement so that we needed to file contested or work it out basically. I said we are she looked at father of the year and said you’re agreeing he just stands there and looks at her stupidly finally answers and says yes. She just looked at him. She said to file new child support and income sheets. I told her we needed to do new ones anyway because income had changed. She gave us everything but with 3 of the kids with us and having to fill out two packs of the same paperwork and then a 3rd of different stuff I told her we would bring it home and do it I would bring it back. One I think is something new as well so I want to look it over.

The way she talked if I turned my papers in Monday I could have a court date by Friday or before. That would be great. I would feel even better if I knew that was all taken care of and not hanging over my head anymore. I was free to do what I wanted to. Wish me luck and pray because I am going to need it. I told a friend if he stops it this time I may attack him before I even think right in the courtroom or court house. She turn on the 12 news and there we would be. I told her she may want to go with me to hold me off of him just incase. It was all I could do not to just yell at him and scream when we got out of the courtroom last time I wanted to hit him so bad. I couldn’t believe what he did after all the time I put in to getting it done and getting the court date to start with.



et cetera
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