{May 24, 2019}   Mystery Blogger Award


I was given this last week around court time and with dealing with that and life the last week or so I haven’t had time to sit down and do it. Now I found myself with that free time so here it is. Hope you enjoy.


The creator of this award,  Okoto Oke Enigma, whose blog site is

I created the award because there are a lot of amazing blogs out there that haven’t been discovered, yet. And, most of these blogs deserve recognition. For that reason, I decided to create my own award; and nominate people who can also nominate others; and so on. This is one of the best ways to create a friendly community and build a link between bloggers in the blogosphere; as everyone gets nominated and they too can spread the fun by nominating more people for the award. Here are the Rules for the Award Nominees.

The mystery blogger award

I decided to call the award “Mystery Blogger Award.” Why? Because the meaning of my name, “Enigma” is “mystery.” So basically, it’s named after myself; the creator. Plus, I think it’s cool because there are so many blogs that are still a mystery to us; and when we get to know them, it’s divine! And we find friends where we least expect.

Mystery Blogger Award” is an award for amazing bloggers with ingenious posts. Their blog not only captivates; it inspires and motivates. They are one of the best out there, and they deserve every recognition they get. This award is also for bloggers who find fun and inspiration in blogging; and they do it with so much love and passion.
– Okoto Enigma”


Here are the Rules for the Award Nominees:

  • Put the award logo/image on your blog.
  • List the rules.
  • Thank whoever nominated you and provide a link to their blog.
  • Mention the creator of the award and provide a link as well.
  • Tell your readers 3 things about yourself.
  • You have to nominate 10-20 people.
  • Notify your nominees by commenting on their blog.
  • Ask your nominees any 5 questions of your choice; with one weird or funny question.
  • Share a link to your best posts.

I would like to thank Grandma Auburn Designs for giving this award to me.

Three things about me, that is hard……….

I deal with depression a lot, although right now I feel good mood wise, I still have no motivation or energy, I feel myself slowly slipping into a bad place.

I have now lost over 65 lbs and only about 8 lbs from where I want to be.

Over all I think I am happier in life now than I ever have been or have been in a really long time. I am probably better off than I have ever been even when I was married.

  • QUESTIONS: I was asked

1 Where is your favorite location in the world? Why?

I haven’t really been to many places I would have to say Tennessee, it is beautiful and so laid back. 

2 Do you have a daily routine, semi-set, or wing it?

Monday-Friday is a routine most the time. The weekend is a wing it kind of time. I have a few things that have to get done but I get to them when I feel like it. 

3 When you were a child, who told the best stories?

That is hard probably my grandparents. 

4 What 4 items are always on your desk?

The only desk I have is my desk at work, 4 things always on it if I am here are my drink, phone, computer, a pen.

5 What was the last show you binge-watched?

It has been so long I don’t even remember, how sad is that. I never watch tv anymore.

My 5 questions for you……..

  1. Are you on Twitter? How can we find you?
  2. What career/job do you do?
  3. How many kids do you have?
  4. What pets do you have?
  5. Are you on time, late, or early to things?

MY Nominees are…….

I am My own Island  One of the first bloggers who started following me and I started following.

Therapy Bits is another one I follow and who follows me that I enjoy reading.

A Guy Called Bloke and K9 Doodlepip! this is one I just started following but enjoy as much as the others. He is very interactive and post interesting things.

Fractured Faith Blog

These are ones I have just found not long ago and are in my list to get to know. I have taken a look around here and there and like what I have seen so far.

A Dad trying to cope with the loss of his Partner and becoming a single parent

A Pause for Nature


For Friends Without Borders

This Beautiful Life


{August 31, 2018}   Random Questions 1

If you didn’t have to sleep, what would you do with the extra time?

I would go back to school and spend more time with the kids.

What’s your favorite piece of clothing you own / owned?

Hum I love my jeans, all I ever wear.

What hobby would you get into if time and money weren’t an issue?

Flipping houses

What would your perfect room look like?

I have nice big bedroom with a king size bed, big walk in closets were you had room to get dressed. Big master bathroom with a tub big enough to soak in.

How often do you play sports?


What fictional place would you most like to go?

Starkshallow or Mayberry can I live there please?

What job would you be terrible at?

I am sure there are lots. I like to work but I have to be into it or i don’t do good.

When was the last time you climbed a tree?

As a kid probably

If you could turn any activity into an Olympic sport, what would you have a good
chance at winning medal for?

Not sleeping at night like other normal people.

What is the most annoying habit that other people have?

Other than breathing for some. Chewing with their mouth open.

What job do you think you’d be really good at?

Social work

What skill would you like to master?

Reading minds lol

What would be the most amazing adventure to go on?

Cross country road trip.

If you had unlimited funds to build a house that you would live in for the rest of your
life, what would the finished house be like?

Not a lot of rooms but lots of room. First floor would be kitchen, livingroom, dining room all open into eachother. There would also be a bathroom and guest bedroom along with a library. A big wrap around porch.

The 2nd floor would have 4 to 6 good size bedrooms with a bathroom inbetween each two so they would share. I would have a laoundry room on 2nd floor with two to three washer and dries. There would be a loft area on either side of the hall way. One for older kids their things one for younger kids. And a wrap around porch.

All of the 3rd floor would be all my room and bathroom. With of course a porch

What’s your favorite drink?

Sweet tea

What state or country do you never want to go back to?

What songs have you completely memorized?

To many but i bet they aren’t 100% right.

What game or movie universe would you most like to live in?

Not sure

What do you consider to be your best find?

My house

Are you usually early or late?


What pets did you have while you were growing up?

Birds,fish, dogs, hamster, ferrets,cat

{July 15, 2018}   Call My Dad So I Can Talk

Last night laying in bed with little bitty daddies came up. She said deadbeat didn’t like me so he left. Meaning me not her. I told her no he left for other reasons. That was not her dad. So then she wanted to know who he was and everything.

I told her his name and pulled up pictures of him on my phone and showed her. All things I have done before. But she was littler then. She asked about him more we talked. She then asked if we coukd call him today? She wants to talk to him and get to know him. She wants to tell him she is about to lose her first tooth and about her dogs and school. I told her I did not have a number for him. She said it was okay she would dream of it when she went to sleep and tell me what it was when she got up. I told her okay and that maybe we could send him a message one day too if she really wanted to get a hold of him. She said okay. So far today she had not said anything to me about him. I forgot to ask oldest if she did her or not. I will have to in the morning.

I can’t catch a break with the daddies this week. But if she ask more I will contact him for her. Pray for the best for her.

{January 14, 2018}   Devastated

I had a nice long talk with the guy I have been talking to Thursday and we talked again for a little bit last night.

Thursday he was devastated when he called me. We talked a minute then he said he had to tell me something or wanted to something like that. He said he lost his job today. He ask me not to say anything because I was only 2nd person who knew. I told him it wasn’t my business to be telling anyone he didn’t have to worry about that.

We talked for a bit he ask me what I was doing. I told him getting dressed going to the beach in a little bit. I guess he didn’t understand me. I ask him if he wanted to go he said maybe then in little bit he said yeah. We went on talking he was down about losing his job he couldn’t believe it he done all he could and had never lost a job before things. I said but look all I have heard since we started talking is you hate your job. You live there you have no life. You wanted to find another you never have a break or vacation days. I said how did you think you were going to find another job when your at this one before places open and do not go home until they close? I said yes it sucks to be fired, yes it was dirty the way they did it, but you can get unemployment, you will have a break not go from one job into another with none. I said now you have time to look for, apply and interview at other places so you can get something better. I know but I can’t do the things I need to do. I have the kids to do for and do things for, i can’t help the something he said, I wasn’t sure what he meant. I said you will make sure the kids have what they need you know that, I know that just the little i know you. I said they don’t need a everything or do everything. I said your going to be their more for them, your going to be more than just a stressed out body that’s just there. I said your going to be happier and be more present and that is going to be a lot to them. That is enough just being with you doing things like the park or whatever.

He said whatever again I ask him what he was talking about. He said like you if we were together and you needed help I can’t and I should be able to and want to. I said its fine He said no its not if you need something I want to help you. I said I have made it happen this long, I can keep making it happen. I am not looking for someone for what I can get or what they can do for me. He said yeah but i would want to help you or whoever i was with. I what you must think of me because I lost my job. I said I do not think any different of you now than I did before. It happens it’s life. I said it is not like you are losing your job every week, month or even few days. Because I know some like that. I said and your worried about it and already taking steps to get a new one so its not a big deal.

We ended up hanging up he had to go. I said I text or call you when I get ready to go. He ask where? I said the beach, I am going to do a few things here and then I will be ready. He was like your going tonight? I said yes I told you. He said I didn’t know you meant tonight I thought you meant tomorrow. I said no it is going be cold. He said you can’t go down there at night by yourself. Its not safe, I use to bounce out there you need stay away from down there by yourself at night. I said I be okay, I been down there a lot. He said no its not your not safe. I said something I could tell he was getting mad and upset. He finally said ugh alright ic your going go stay where its lit up and good lights. I just said I be okay and we hung up.

Later I text ask if he was mad? I said I just been wanting to go, most the time I find someone to go no one wants to go. I just want to get out clear my head or what. He said no not mad at you, just be safe I know how it is done there. I would go but I am dealing with all that has happen today and I don’t want to go out with you in the mood I am in now. If we go out I want to be in a better mood and things. I shouldn’t of dump on you basically what he said. I told him he was fine I wasn’t worried about that but I understood.

I had to do somethings here with the kids and fed the kids. Some how me and him ended up back on the phone together. I don’t know how or why but we did. We talked for a little bit and my little one kept coming in wanting this or that and complaining about the other kids and everything else. I finally told them I was leaving I would be back in a little while. I didn’t end up at the beach at that point. I told him I was out for a little bit if he wanted to meet up and just talk that was fine. He said he wasn’t going out tonight but if I wanted to come over he meet me out front we could talk or what. I said okay that be fine. I didn’t have anywhere to go and don’t know where we would of sat and talked anyway. Then he said no just forget it or something so I ended up going over behind the plaza and trailer park across town and sat in this little are a by a lake thing they have dug out there.

I sat there for a couple of hours just talking to him and listening to him. He told me he liked talking to me and it made him feel better when he talked me to me and things. He said that our friend that we met each other through was telling him he should ask me out and things. He said you seem like a really awesome girl and she says that you are and that we would be good together. He said he told her he didn’t know if I was interested he didn’t think I liked him and things. She told him he should just try and see what happen or how things went. He said some more ask me a few things.

I started to say a few things he stopped me, or wasn’t listening really. I finally said can I say something or I have something to say okay. Can I be honest with you? You can take it how every you want to take it and do whatever you want to do with it. I said you can say whatever you want to say good or bad it won’t bother me and I will understand. I’m just going to put it all out there. I don’t remember what he said but I could tell he wasn’t sure about what I was going to say and a little worried maybe.

I said look you keep saying this that and the other and you don’t know or that I said this before, referring to not what I was looking for and not sure if I am interested. I said I like you, you seem like a really decent guy. I would be interested in getting together getting to know each other and see what we think and where things go from there. I said I can’t say a lot because I don’t know anymore than what I hear on the other end of the phone and the messages I get. I need more than that. I want to meet you get to know you. He stopped me and said really? Like he was shocked. He started to say other stuff and I stopped him. I said no I am not done, I said something else he started talking again. I said hush and listen you not allowed to talk right now that is the problem you don’t listen you just think everyone this or that and no one this or that. I said you need to get over that. I said you have to get over the no good enough and making excuses for things when no one has even said anything wrong or negative just because you think they are going to. I said now let me finish.

I said I am looking to take things slow, I am not looking to rush into anything. I want someone to date do things with and get to know get to be friends as we go. I said I am not looking for someone who is just here for here and now or until something better comes alone, I am not looking for someone that is just in it for what I can do for them or what they can get, I am looking for something that is going to be long term. I said I am not looking for sex not with you or anyone right now if I am talking to someone I am not going to be with someone else until. I said if I am talking to someone then I am willing to wait until I am ready to be with that person just as I expect that if someone is talking to me they are willing to wait not talking to or being with someone else. I said it isn’t you it is with anyone I meet that is not something I am looking for or to get into right away. I told him that I knew he had kids just like he knew I had kids and that it didn’t bother me that was fine. But that I did not want him meeting my kids nor did I want to meet his kids anytime soon. That I wanted to wait until we had decided where things were that it was going somewhere and that a relationship was what we wanted and had been together a little while. I told him that knowing that he had kids I understood they came first and that he was doing his best to be there for them and take care of them and the I wanted someone to understand where I was coming from and that my kids came first and that I am the only one that does it all for them I don’t have help and things like that it is just me and them. That it isn’t easy and sometimes plans get changed or things happen or I get busy and do not always have a lot of time. That I wanted someone that understood that and wasn’t going to get mad or hold that against me well I am always busy or what. I said just like I wouldn’t you or someone else. I said I want someone that is going to be there to talk to and do things with but don’t have to be here all the time and still knows that everything is alright or that I am not messing around with someone else. I said I just want someone that is going to be honest and upfront I am tired of games and being lied to and used.

He said no he understood about not bringing the kids into it for a while. I said they all get brought into it then they get use to each other and the other person and then if something happens they just end up hurt in the end. That isn’t fair or right to them and I don’t want to lose kids again. I told him I did that before and brought them in to soon and everyone ended up hurt and I did too. That they were little and don’t remember it to much and that I wasn’t messing up and making that mistake again with them. He didn’t have a problem with that, he agreed.

He was kind of surprised I think by all I had to say. But he was okay with it all and agreed with most of it. He said he didn’t want to just date and play around he wanted to find someone that was looking for more than just going out or being “friends”.

We talked a while longer and he was starting to fall a sleep from being up so early and it getting so late. I told him I would talk to him tomorrow to go to bed I needed to get home to the kids anyway. He said somethings that didn’t even make since. I said okay goodnight and hung up.

He is really hard to understand on the phone I don’t know what it is. I think he talks kind of low because he don’t want everyone else around in the house to hear him and a lot of times his kids are there and sleeping. Then he isn’t close to the phone or what. I have to keep telling him I can’t hear him, he is mumbled or what. I know he gets aggravated but I don’t want to not know what he is saying either of act like I do and I have no idea.

et cetera
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