{December 18, 2019}   Inches not Pounds

I think I am losing inches but not pounds right now. As a matter of fact I know I have gained some weight back. I am over 130 and was under. I think I may have gained around 6 to 10 pounds back. not at all worried about it really. I really am okay with where I am as long as I don’t gain anymore. I wouldn’t like to be no more than 130 my goal was 120. So I could stand to lose a little to stay at the 130. But not a big deal to me right now.

My pants still fit I’m not having to go up a size. Really they are lose still and feeling bigger. This and just looking at myself the other day when I was getting dressed out of the shower I look like my waste is smaller maybe not my waste for say but my torso over all looks smaller. I thought how do I look so much smaller but gained weight but then I thought about muscle weighing more than fat and how you can lose inches but not pounds. I know how it all works but it has been a while but that is what has to come into play here. some how some way. or maybe I just seeing things through rose colored glasses. But I feel better and have noticed my pants feel bigger and I can slide my jeans off and on without unzipping or buttoning them pretty easily.

As long as I don’t gain I will be alright with whatever is happening.

{December 29, 2018}   Everythings Gone

Thursday after the one owner came back and then left Bff called me crying. I couldn’t even tell at first what she was saying. Finally I could understand her, she was saying it’s all gone, it’s all gone. I had no idea what she was talking about she said everything. The car I was driving, my truck, his car he was driving, his truck, his shop, tools, everything is gone.

Background first…..She has a suv she is buying from where I am now working. Her husband my old boss from the transmission shop moved from where we were to a new one over the Summer. You probably remeber that is when He no longer needed me. Well since he got hooked up with the guy that owns the car lot that wanted me to work for nothing. The last month he has decided to move his shop to the bays at the car lot. And he has gotten cars off the lot and is driving them. One for him one for bff. The guy had a tow truck he let him use. He says gave him don’t believe. They are supposed to be partner’s now she gets her car free and clear she was told.

Well I guess her hubby pissed the car lot guy off. He says old boss ripped people he knew off said he did work and didn’t. Well one of old bosses guys quite right before Christmas and another since. Yesterday one was missing. A scanner was missing as well, has been for a few days I guess.

Well bff’s truck was up for repo because he hasn’t paid on it since last month. It was behind then and not caught up.

Well Wednesday night in the night the car lot guy had the cars they had from the lot picked up, the tow truck picked up and they took her fence apart and took her truck she is buying from where I work. I guess there are tools missing from the shop as well. The guy who left before Christmas took over the shop at the car lot went in told him to get off the property not to come back. Make an appointment to come get anything he had left there.

They are all saying he has and is ripping people off and that he has a pill problem. There are like 5 or more people off the top of my head that are telling her he has a problem. She says she hasn’t seen proof and things. I keep telling her people everywhere he goes dont just say this about him. You don’t just make all this money not pay your bills and have nothing at all now to show for it not even a car to drive. She is in denial she says she isn’t but she is and she is depressed. Anyone would be but she has to stop and get up do something because things are going to get worse. I was told that afternoon there was more to come. She was too from people very close to the source. She needs to do something and get her and her kids out of it now. I told her I am worried that her and the kids are going to get hurt. Like I told her look at all they did out there the other night and she had no clue they were there sat and watched tv why they did it or slept. They could be in her house or do anything before she knew they were there. Then what?

All she says is I know or I don’t know. I been over there a few times the propane tanks have been messed with and turned on outside. I keep telling her he needs to lock those up and put them away and that isn’t just happening by accident when they haven’t been using them not been home and things. I forgot about it until last night I am going to bring it up to her today when I talk to her.

Like I told her it was bad enough that he was doing them but at least he was functioning and paying bills and doing things right. He has hit an all new level at this point. He isn’t functioning, he isn’t paying bills, he is ripping people off or basically stealing from them when it comes down to it.

Like I told her he is no different than these that go into peoples houses and steal their stuff. Only difference is he has found a “better” way to do it. He gets them to come to him then collects money and leaves their car sit forever dont work on it or says he is buying new parts and puts old ones from whereever he can in it so he has more money in his pocket.

He is still telling her that everything is fine he didn’t do anything it’s everyone else. He isn’t worried. But then the night all this happen he was up half the night stressing about it.

I said what is he stressing about if he hasn’t done anything? She said I don’t know.

She went and talk to the kid she took in a year or two ago who calls them mom and dad and that was supposed to be getting part of the shop. He was the one that no one knew where he was. He turned his phone off and disappeared the day all this went down. Come to findout he had the scanner everyone was worried about. He had signed on it with her hubby and he was I guess worried about having to pay for it if something happen to it. So he went and took it home it had been left in the old shop.

But he told her he is doing all this too he is going to the other shop or somewhere else to work.

I told her she can not be mad at him. He is one that has been telling her things here and there over the last year since he went to the shop and started working. Him and the guy that left and decided to open his shop back up. I said he has his past he is overcoming still. He has his gf now and a brand new baby to look out for and take care of. He can’t keep being around this day in and day out and not slip up and fall back into it. I said he has to much to lose. He is trying to get his little boy back he can’t be around all this. If something goes down he is going too just because of his past and being there. He had a drug problem and just got off probation in October. He has been clean for around a year give or take. Because I know he had a slip up back right before he moved it with them so maybe its more like two years now. Im not sure but I know he has been doing good and passing his test so he needs to get himself away from it all. I do not think he had any idea how bad things were or how bad he was when he went to work for him. Now he seen and he says he is over it. Its wrong and he isn’t being a part of it.

She says she isn’t mad at him, that I am right she knows. But then turns around later and says you know everyone wants to nit pick and look at everything. If one person gets mad puts you on blast everyone jumps on board. All the shops have problems with people not paying and complaining and not happy.

I said that is what he says, I said yes the others will have a problem customer and they screw things up once in a while. But not 3 out of every 5 and not all the time and not like he has. I said there are to many and to much happens up there him fighting with people. I said I know a lot of guys that work in a lot of these shops or have and they do not have near as many issues as he has had. She don’t say anything. I said and okay it is just problem customer’s he did nothing wrong they all just want something for free or whatever. That takes care of that there is no problem he isn’t ripping people off they are all lying. We have explained that.

Explain this to me, why does he have no money ever? Why is all the bills behind and going off all the time? Why is rent a month or two behind all the time? Your truck?

He makes anywhere from $5000 a month or more. You could pay your rent up for a year and have some left in one month. You make more than enough to pay all your bills and your car payments and still have some left. But nothing is paid. Nothing is paid at the shop not even the parts stores where he has to get the parts most the time. And according to you all he makes over $5000 in a month most months. So where is the money? Why is nothing paid? I don’t know it makes no since to me either all she says. He don’t tell me anything. I said of course not.

I seen him taking shit when I first started working for him and told her. Just like he would hide from all these people who came to the shop all the time. Always some reason. One day he couldn’t get out of the office to hide because the guy was right there outside the door. He got on his hands and knees and hid under his desk until he left. What the hell was that about? You don’t do that just because someone “talks to much” and you can’t get away from them like he said. Now I wonder what would of happen that day had he seen him. What I could of been sitting in the middle of and had no clue about anything. I thought the pills he was taking at first were his. I had not been around in so long I had no reason to think any different. Then I started noticing things seeing things and people started talking. Everything started adding up.

{July 30, 2018}   Weight Loss Update

I have not checked my weight in a few weeks maybe more. Since I posted and saod I had gain some back. I can’t check weekly to offten because I will get aggregated if I am not losing or see that O gained that pound or two. I use to check everyday or two before and one day would show no difference then the next I had lost 2lbs. Right now I haven’t been trying to lose I just have so it is a nice serprise when I step on the scale and see how much I have lost.

Even with all I have lost and going from my size 14 to 8 I hadn’t really seen it. I still have this belly that I wish would go away and my legs still look big in my thighs. I am not worried about how they look or my body. I am 100% fine with my body and how it looks, it is just that these areas are the areas for me that I notice and see the weight loss in more than anywhere for some reason. Everyone keeps saying my face looks smaller and they can see it over all that I have lost. For me I just don’t, I guess it is just because I see myself everyday maybe?

But anyway I went in the bathroom the other day and got underessed to take a shower. I got undressed and used the bathroom. I looked down and was like wow. My legs look so much smaller through my thighs and things. My belly a little but I still do not really see it there, like I do in my legs now. Now I feel better and like I have accomplished something. That I am getting somewhere.

I think I am back to maintaining not losing or gaining. I can live with that for a bit. Because I am down to the last 30lbs. I seem to lose a good amount all at once after I come out of a maintaining stage. So I will probably lose it pretty quickly once I start again. I am sure if I wanted to I can work at it and drop it but I really do not feel like it.

{July 24, 2017}   24 Lbs and Counting

Since I started my job I have lost 24 lbs, 15 of that was with in the first few weeks and the rest the last 3 or so. I have a thing to count my steps and I do 2000 or more in one 5 to 6 hour shift or less. I also sweat a lot, I drink and drink but standing over the grill cooking and being back in the hot kitchen area where the a/c was/is broken or it’s just to hot I sweat so bad that I never have to go to the restroom why I am at work even though I probably drink more while I am there than I do the rest of the day.

After I noticed I lost the first 15 lbs I started watching how much I eat as well. I have never been a breakfast eater so I don’t have to worry about that. Lunch is hit or miss if I eat it or not, I still don’t eat lunch all the time but more now than I did. I will eat a small chicken sandwich or a snack wrap if I eat lunch. At dinner time I will eat whatever we are having. But I get less than I normally would and I don’t go back for more. Last week I cut all soda out and tried to cut coffee but it didn’t work. I want to cut soda tea and coffee but I don’t know if I can cut the tea or not. This week I am going to try cutting the coffee because I drink way to much of it and I know it will or is making me gain.

I hope I keep losing it fast, I only have 44 lbs to go to hit my goal of where I want to be. I hope that I can cut this other stuff out of my diet and can drop it fast. That is one reason I have been trying to have a little something for lunch, cut the soda’s out trying to cut the coffee out and all that. I figure that if I start eating lunch more than not that will help me from hitting a Plato, then if cut out all soda, then a week or two later coffee and then tea it will help shake things up a little.

If I can lose these last 44 lbs I will be back to where I was when I finished high school and had kids. I will also be a healthy weight again.

et cetera
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