Single___Parent___Life











My friend called and was talking to me earlier she talked for a little while and that is odd, she never calls and talks very long in the day time. She called me two or three times the third time she talked for a while. Then she gets around to telling me how her son up north got arrested yesterday.

She tells me how her other son and his wife took off work and went to the court hearing I guess the way she talked. She said when he was brought in and seen them there he just hung his head and looked at the floor. Once it was over they got his car and they left. Well I guess the brother not in jail broke down in the parking lot after they got home or on the way. She tells me she broke down and was all hysterical when she found out.

This is not surprise, they knew it was coming and it isn’t like he is looking at a great amount of time maybe 6 months I think. Less than a year. He got caught drinking a driving, he didn’t pay all that he was supposed to pay and he didn’t do the classes and things he was supposed to do. He just ignored it all like it was going to go away I guess. She was up there for Christmas and New Years and he was supposed to pay it by now and didn’t. I am guessing he turned himself in because they issued a warrant. It isn’t like he don’t have the money for it and couldn’t do it. He works everyday and makes good money. Until not long ago he was living with his brother and his family and wasn’t paying them either, and he is behind on his car payment they were looking for it to take it and they lied said they didn’t know who he was or where he lived. I told her that shit don’t work because they can find out and they are not stupid that is why they keep coming back there. Even though he may not live there they know he is related to them and they know where he is. He has a drug problem I knew this for a while when she was telling me how he works all the time isn’t paying anything never has no money and the people he is running around with. I didn’t say anything he had one in the past they all have I figured she knew. Well I am sure she knew she was just in denial. She called me up about 8 months ago and told me he did and something that happen maybe that was when he got arrested for driving under the influence. I said I know, she said how did you know? I said because nothing adds up he works every day and never has any money and never pays anyone, he has had one in the past and he don’t have a girl or anything he is spending it on. It isn’t hard to figure out. She was like yeah your right and I should have known but I didn’t I didn’t think it was that but whatever she went on. Then why she was up there he took her to a friends house she found out he was there buying drugs why he had her with him. She freaked out because she was scared they were going to get caught. He made  deal with her and his dad he was going to pay his fines do the things he needed to do and get all this taken care of. He didn’t so he went to jail.

The brother and wife get home or where every they were going and the brother is all a mess and the mother is down here all a mess the wife decides that she is going to go a bail him out so those two will calm down and be happy. I also think she had other motives for doing it but this is what she told my friend and her son she was only doing it for him and her not the one in jail. I think she done it because she is getting her pills from him or he is getting them for her because she has a problem of her own that she is trying to hide. She is always calling my friend anytime she is in town asking for her pills or when she goes up there tells her to make sure she brings them. She complains about what the brother does but she is doing the same thing.

She tells me that once he was finally released her son calls all pissed off and says that he never even said thank you when he got out, nothing at all. He went home and him and his girlfriend went to eat and things. But they had no money at all left to get him out they put in all they had and was broke until payday. But as soon as he gets out they are going out for a night on the town. I said and your both surprised by this why? She said because that is his brother and his wife they got him out of jail used their bill money and this is the thanks they get. I said sure it is because it was expected that he would get him out, he knew he wasn’t going to stay there he knew he didn’t have to ask he knew that he would not leave him there and would do whatever he had to do get him out. She said yeah your right he knows his brother will do anything for him.

Just like when he was living there and not paying his brother complained and complained to my friend but he wouldn’t tell him you have to pay or you have to get out. He has a family to take care of while he has no one but himself and if he decides to pay child support. But his brother wouldn’t do it because he was so worried he would stop speaking to him and have nothing to do with him. He didn’t’ want to lose his brother.

She then told me that her husband told the other brother that got him out that he would help him and give him the money he spent to get him out back! I said what why would you do that so now not only is your son enabling him but you all are as well. You are helping your son enable him then your going to be all upset when something happens and when he don’t grow up and handle his stuff his-self and do what he needs to. Why would he when you all sweep it up and pick up the pieces for him and he has to do nothing but go to work collect his pay check and go out and have a good time. She says I know but this and that. I said look he is a big boy he decided to do this so now he needs to man up and handle the outcome like it or not. Why should you or your son take away from your family and bill money and do without to fix his screw ups and he sure don’t care that you are or he wouldn’t keep doing it.

Then she tells me that her bank is over drafted by $1000 and that they had to sell some stuff the other day to put gas in the car and buy a loaf of bread. How she only has a few things in the fridge and she is running out of that and ways to cook it. I said my point and now your going to do without more so that you can give them $400 and some dollars to because they got him out of jail and he isn’t bothering to pay them back when he just had a check Yesterday and he will get another one next Friday? He lives with his girlfriend and her mom who have money so they are not going to be doing without and they aren’t because they are already out for a night on the town as soon as he got out. But you can’t go buy basics that you need for your house to eat. I said it isn’t like he lost his job or got sick and missed work he is sitting there with kids that need to eat and he can’t buy them food and the things they need and needs a little help. He did things and he is still doing things that are against the law and got in trouble. He knew what would or could happen he chose to still do them then he needs to stand up be a man and take care of them not expect all of you too.

She says yeah but it’s so hard and you say this stuff. I said and I am not just saying this and don’t know or haven’t been there, I said I left my dad in jail when my oldest was just a few weeks old because he got arrested for drinking and driving. I couldn’t get him out and I was not taking money I needed for diapers and things to get him out he sat there for about two months before he got out. She said really you did that with your dad. I said yes because I did not have it the only one who could get him out was my mom and he had made her mad just before he went in so she refused to help or do anything. I couldn’t use what I had because I had no way to get anymore and I needed it for bills and the baby. No not my kid but just about the same, she knows how close me and my dad are and that we always helped each other out when we could and found a way if we couldn’t. I could have called my grandpa but he was sick and going through treatment so I wasn’t going to bother him and upset him and get him to go out and deal with the hassle of trying to get him out from the other side of the state or where ever he was at that time. I know my dad wouldn’t not have wanted me to bother him either.

Like I told her my dad told me and my brother he would get us out one time and one time only so we better make sure that was the one time we wanted him to get us out. After that sit your butt down get comfy because your going to be sitting if you don’t find someone else to get you out. There is not putting money in your account and things like that either. You are there you have free room and board, three meals a day, shower, tv and all that you need. You have no need for money. May not be the best of the best or that great to eat but hey you got yourself there you do what you have to do so that you get out and don’t end up back there again. Your not on vacation.

I don’t feel bad for her not having anything right now either because her husband works and makes good money. He works 16 hour days 6 to 7 days a week. He is supposed to have a week off but works half that week or more most the time as well. They should not be behind on their bills, have nothing in the house and have their bank $1000 in the negative.  They took that trip knowing they were behind on rent and things already. Then he came back and didn’t work for a week or more because he was “sick” I do not know anyone who gets as sick as they do as often as they do when she never leaves the house and he hardly goes to work. He has missed so much work they told him he had better come in with a doctors note and that if he missed anymore he would probably lose his job. With in a day or two of going back he missed a day because he couldn’t SLEEP. I said are you kidding me he already was told not to miss anymore and that is what he called and told them. Then was mad they wrote him up. I told her she is lucky that is all they done because they could have gotten rid of him very easily. I don’t know anyone that misses work as much as he misses. RC told me when I first met them and before we became friends that he had a problem with coming to work. Then another friend of mine, my good friend told me the same thing, he don’t come to work half the time and things. When father of the year got him that job at the shop when he was driving tow trucks he missed a ton of work there and then got mad they found spots for everyone so they could keep their jobs but him. Then he got this job and he is hardly ever there. He will work two or three good days maybe a week and then missing days. She is the same way with work and school she missed so much in her classes she failed for not going and had to pay for classes 3 times now because she didn’t go and failed. She started school way before I did and I don’t think she is close to being done. When she tells you she is going to go somewhere don’t count on it. The other week she told me she would be at my house Thursday morning on Wednesday. My friends boyfriend messaged me ask what I was doing the next day. I told him supposed to be doing something with her why? He needed a ride so I told him that was fine I would pick him up after I dropped the kids off. I had done picked him up ran him a few places stopped at my house for a little bit after I picked them up and hung out and had never heard from her. It was almost 12 when I heard from her and that was for her to say she wasn’t coming. I was not surprised at all that is why I told them I would take them where they needed to go. If she has showed up I could have meet her here at the house it would have only took a minute or two to get home.

She knows that I am supposed to get that money either this week or in a few and I look for her to ask me to loan her some money. Well her husband to ask me to loan them some. I am not doing it, because they could have money but they are deciding to give it away over keeping it and doing what they need to do with it. I am not helping them enable the other one to do his drugs and whatever else he is doing. I have my kids to take care of and I will have money put back for future bills and things but that is besides the point I also owe the kids money and it is my oldest birthday Monday. I plan to do a party for her and things as well. I am going to keep out what I need for right now and a little extra so we can get things if we need them but the rest is going to be put toward paying the rent up as much as I can. Then I will get money each month to put back what I used to pay it up then I can use that to pay a little more up and to get other things we want or need at that time. Right now with the spot they are in with the bank being over drafted by so much I can’t count on them giving it back to me when they say they will because who knows what will happen. The bank gets theirs first because it goes right in the bank. Then if other bills or things they need to pay they aren’t going to be paying me when they figure I have all this money in the bank, I will be put on the back burner. I am just going to tell her I payed everything to rent but what I needed to pay bills and things. They can get mad but I am not supporting others habits and helping them is doing just that.



{January 21, 2017}   Got to Love Father of The Year :/

I can not wait to get my money and find a job. I am so over Father of the Year owing me money and shit. They call today and want to know what I need money for. Said they paid the car insurance and water that was over the $200 he was going to give me. Then I got into it with my mom over money because she has given me about $50 the last couple months. Well as far as I knew ex was supposed to be paying her back we talked about it he said he was going to. She informed me that she owes me money and that she is just taking it off what she owes me and it isnt’ fair to him to make him pay it back. Well yeah it is because he isn’t paying like he is supposed to and he isn’t taking the kids like he is supposed to and he isn’t paying as much as he should be to start with. Why should it come out of my pocket when everything else already has until I have no money to make sure things were paid before? And I never asked her for the money and and did not need it. We could have done without it.

She starts about why am I mad and she has done without this and that and they been eating noodles and canned whatever and this and that and how she has had to buy all the food there and buy him food and pay for gas for him to get to and from work and everything else. That is not my problem you look at him and say your a grown ass man go figure out how to feed yourself and get gas for work. He don’t because he knows she will hand it to him. If she wants to give it to him and do without then that is on her. I have also gotten them food the last month or so if they didn’t buy food and things and got just whatever to eat that is not my fault either. She telling me he can’t give me anymore money until the middle of next month and things. He still owes me over $500 plus money every week. He told me he was going to give me gas money the rent money and things like that by the first. She saying he has to have that for this and that and needs to pay her back some of what he owes her and buy food. Well not my problem some of their bills are going to have to get behind or he needs to go borrow some money to pay theirs or what he owes me one. That is all on him not me. She got all mad because I said something about he was supposed to pay her that back and things. Said I don’t care she is doing without and all this. She finally said she was going to go I said whatever I didn’t have anything to say to her anyway.

She calls me back in a little bit and ask me if I can hold on to this money for rent if he gives me the money for rent now. I told her yes, what else am I going to say oh no I’m going to spend it? If I get it now or I get it next week I need it for rent it can’t be spent on anything else. Then I thought the other part of my lights needed paid today and it was more than what he was even supposed to give me for rent. So he wen to pay that and she is saying well I don’t know what you are going to do about the rent now that is the money for the rent and he can’t give you no more until the middle of next month. I’m just like ok whatever, again what am I going to say and I have nothing to say to her. She is the one sitting there someone else is paying all the bills and rent but your worried about being paid back and getting your money back over your grand kids that is fine because having that money in her pocket just so she has her money back is more important than her grand kids having a place to live and things. Because isn’t going to spend it on anything she isn’t not eating or eating what she is because of money. She is because of her fucking OCD shit and her I have everything wrong with me and can’t eat hardly anything at all. I just said I got to go and hung up. I had things to do and had been trying for over and hour to get going so I could do them but she kept calling back why I was trying to get things together and ready and get a shower.

I had enough I need things here and I need the money for rent and things I got my shower got ready loaded my guns up and took them up to the pawn shop and pawned them. I know that I will have my money by this time next month we are supposed to have it the 17 it will probably come before that. I have to pay $50 to get them back on what I borrowed not a big deal. My phone has hardly worked for the last two days as well. I was going to see how much one would cost me since I was due for an upgrade. When I got to the pawn shop the phone store was right next to them. They must of opened in the last year or so because I haven’t pawned anything in a year or more. I don’t think I have pawned anything sine I lived her other than my truck that one time at a different shop.

After I was done there I walked over told her I needed to see what phones I could get with the upgrade I was up for. She looked it up and said I wasn’t due and upgrade. I told her the other one said I was just a month or less ago. She said no it wasn’t showing I was due for one. Then she asked if I swapped phones? I had when Father of the Year gave me that one and it didn’t work I had to switch back to my broken one. She said even though I did not buy one and use my upgrade that when I swap to a different phone it does away with my upgrade and I have to wait 120 days to get another one. If that had not happen I could have gotten one for I thought it was $20 but it was $30. With no upgrade the cheapest I could get one for was $64. I told her I couldn’t do that and left. I went to one closer to my house where I first started dealing with this company forever ago to see what kind of used ones the guy had there I could maybe buy or to see if he could help me some how because he is the owner of the store. If there was anyway to get my credit back or anything he would know and be more willing to help me because I have been going there for so long and he knows me. I just went to the other one because it was right there and I had other things to do. I got there he checked it and said no and that they were trying to fix it so that if something like what happen to me happen they could give you the upgrade that if you were due one it didn’t go away unless you bought a phone but until then there wasn’t a way around it. I forget what he said about a used one. He told me to go to the Best Buy in the mall and buy a phone not from there or one of the other stores. He showed me where the new ones he had for around $80 I could get with my upgrade for $30 but since I didn’t have my upgrade I had to pay the $80. He said but I know they have it for the $25 or $30 and they have these others for the lower price here as well but we have to sell them at these prices unless you have an upgrade then charge for switching it and he said before you know it I have to charge you $100 or more for the same phone you can get over there for $30.
So that is what I done I went over to the mall and found the same one like he said that I was looking to buy for the $30 for that price instead of the $80 he was going to charge me. Then I asked the guy if they charged to switch it over and he said no I just had to know my pin number to the account. I had that so he set it up and swapped it all over for free for me. I would have had to bring it home get someone to let me borrow their phone to call and switch it over if I had bought it from the other guy or paid him the $15 fee to change it over. That saved me the trouble and money there too.

In the meantime when I was headed to talk to the guy at the store I normally use I called father of the year and said something to him about my phone and him not getting the other one turned in and things. I have asked him to just go to the library take 20 minutes and do what they told him to do to get a shipping label to send it back. He has yet to do it in what two or three weeks. Because at this point it took me like 3 tries to even make that phone call I can’t send a text and almost can’t see the screen at all. He just oh I been busy blah blah. I told him I need the phone not only in case something happens but for the internet too. I have to do my school stuff and get it turned in on time. I will get to it I sent you all the information you didn’t do it. I can show right on my phone I do not have one text with any information to fill in and print this out. Then he puts it on speaker and my mom starts. Why didn’t I get the internet hooked up with the other company and i need to pay the other place how they are cheaper and whoever told me what lied they offer this at this price and all that. How he don’t have money to give me and can’t get me a phone. I wasn’t calling to ask him for a phone I was calling because I was pissed off that he does nothing else but he can’t even turn the shit in and get a label so I can send this one back it isn’t going to cost him a dime to do it and he knew this one was really messed up and going to go out anytime and how much I needed it. Still didn’t offer to even do that.

Then I said I had to mail the box back for the one I have and everything. She started about why I hadn’t done that and why I hadn’t called the other company and turned in the paper to get the other service hooked up and how I am and that I could have come there and printed the thing for the phone. I had no gas I told her and that I can’t print something I have no information for. Well I don’t know I didn’t know he was supposed to be printing it blah blah. I said the problem is yet again he does nothing at all he could careless and now I am having to figure it out and fix it. She is telling me to go to the other company and they give free phones. BUt you have to pay your month service and activation fee. It up to about $100 or close to it. She is telling me it isn’t. I said again I was just there a few weeks ago and talk to them about it. I also took a friend to get a phone and it is how it works. Just like the internet service yeah she might be paying one price but guess what I have talk to about 5 different people at the place and they said it is not in my area or that it was a promotional and not for my area. I have been to the store about the phone twice and then took my friend to get hers it’s close to $100 even with a free phone. I think she paid $89 or something. Again my mom don’t know because she got a phone from my sister and had it added to her plan where she pays $20 a month. Then bitching about not getting the other service hooked up for internet. I told her I didn’t because it was a waste of time and money since I could do it from my phone with the internet to my laptop. I only need it for a month or month and half. Then someone was said about me driving after we been on the phone for 30 minutes or more. Your fighting while driving and on the phone blah bullshit? I said yeah I am talking to you all while I am driving have been since before I called I have places to go and things to do I don’t have time to sit and hang on the phone with you all and do nothing while I do. She got all pissed off and said well I got to go call me when your not driving and threw something in there about the rent and not getting internet service and hung up. Why would I go through the trouble of finding everything and printing everything out mailing it in it takes about two weeks to get it sent back and forth then a week or so for them to send the stuff. On top of that I have to then set a time for someone to come out and put a phone jack in because I don’t have one. It will take 3 to 4 weeks to set it up and I only want it for a month anyway. By the time they set it up I will not need it and I will save money like I said doing it this way.

I went got my phone done all the other stuff I had to do and came home. I called him back and told him I had the rent money to not worry about it not that he was anyway. I told him I got a new phone as well. WHAT how did you do that he said. I said I went and pawn my guns since I know I can get them back by the middle of next month. Oh well I guess. I told him it is a crappy phone he still needs to get this turned in because I have lost my upgrade for him telling me this other one worked and trading it over and now that I spent money on this one I can’t buy another one when I get my money. He needs to turn the other one in still and get the new one. I can trade to it and then put this one up in case something happens and it breaks or something and I need one and can’t get it. He says ok but we shall see. Then again of course my mom has to jump in and put her two cents in. Then he is on the phone he said he had to go he was busy or something he could’t talk. I asked what he was doing I wanted to ask him about him seeing the kids or what this weekend. He said eating, I could tell he wasn’t at home I asked here he was he said Sonny’s. I said oh that must be nice to go out to eat when you have no money and leave us sit scrapping to get the things we need and the hundreds of dollars you owe the kids. He didn’t say anything just he had to go he would call back later. I haven’t heard from him and it’s been about 6 hours or more. They have no money can’t afford food but they can afford about $15 a person for one meal instead of taking that $30 and putting food in the house. Why the kids ask can’t we just go to Mac Donald’s for dinner or can’t I just buy lunch at school today I really want to have this or that they are having and I have to tell him no pack your lunch. Knowing I need money to pay the rent that is about half of what I need to pay my rent come the first. But he don’t have it. Sorry son of a bitch that he is. I wish he would just go up north to be with his brothers or go on up farther to be with his friend he talks to and likes so much. If he did I do not think we would hear from him hardly ever and it would be so nice.

Earlier when we were talking about a phone and not having the internet I said I would have to go to the library and that I needed him to come over here with the kids so I could. She started about all this stuff at her house that needed cleaned he messed up and is supposed to help her clean up and they should be done about 1 tomorrow how he always comes over here. I got news for her he is hardly ever over here. I think twice in the last couple months he has been here for a few hours that is it. OTher than that he runs in drops money off or whatever says he has all this to do and has to go. I wanted to say your house is never going to be clean enough for  you because you need help and refuse to get it that is why the kids can’t come over there. Because when you get this whatever mess cleaned up and get done throwing everything away you will have something else that has contaminated your house and it won’t be clean enough for them again. It is nothing wrong with her house but the shit she has in her head and from reading google. Shit that no one else in this world would ever worry about, clean their house top to bottom front to back and throw shit away over. No one at all would, but her. I wanted to say that is fine I am not worried about it but I didn’t. She would wanted to know what I meant by that, I am not saying anything at all but he has not took the kids once sine the divorce, his child support like I said is based on how many over nights he is supposed to have them. He has never come here got them and took them any where or anything else. He runs in here sees them for a few hours or so here and there that is all. That is not what the divorce papers said. And it does not say I have to let him come here just like I told him. But I am keeping track of it all so that when I want to move I can and he can’t do anything about it. He can’t say I want her to stay here because I want to be able to see my kids. I can’t have my kids on the weekend and during the week if she moves away. Because when I go look here judge he has not had them one time or taken them anywhere not one time since the divorce what visits is he talking about? The judges is going to say the same thing and most likely let me go if he tries to fight me on it. He said he wasn’t but who knows. I am not going to worry about it even if he signs the papers when I file them I am turning in all the documentation I have with the paper work showing he has not had them or done anything so if he shows up in court and says anything the judge can say I already see right here you are not seeing the kids or having anything to do with them with them here.

It just aggervates me how he just could careless but then keeps coming around. Then how she gets in the middle of everything. I am going to tell him again and her that she needs to stay out of it all.



et cetera
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