{March 28, 2019}   What I Signed Up For

Last night one of the drivers called and had a problem with the load he was picking up. It was a return he needed to pick up and drop somewhere. Part of the load was picked up by another driver because neither driver had room for it all. There was papers for each but none of it was going to match up for either one because the way the load was packed and it couldn’t be split up for it to match the paperwork. They just needed something to show where it was going and to be signed off on.

This guy was all bent out of shape because his papers didn’t match his load. What was he supposed to be picking up and he didn’t think it matched. The guy training me told him it wasn’t going to match it was just to be signed it wasn’t a big deal. He kept going on about it and that it said he had this but it wasn’t there. Then he had so many of this and he had more then he had less then he didn’t know. He asked how many bags were on each pallet and he told him you can’t count them because of the way they are packed. They go back and forth for another 5 minutes or more. Then the guy starts counting the bags that are on each pallet after telling us he couldn’t and you couldn’t. I busted up laughing I said hey look Buttercup learned to count. Finally he got him to understand that all he needed to do was pick the stuff up and drop it where he was told and have the paper he has signed and that is it. It don’t matter at this point what is on the pallets as long as it is something off that paper. He said okay and hung up.

I was just shaking my head and laughing. The guy training me turned around and said this, this is what you signed up for! You signed up for this right here. This is going to be the biggest part of what you do and laughed. I laughed I said that’s alright I think I can handle it. I could be doing a lot worse for a lot less. This is nothing.

I met a lot more of the guys, we had a lot more trucks come in than I remember coming in last week on Wednesday. Tuesday and Wednesdays are our busy nights. A bunch of the trucks are coming and going from the yard and meeting up and coming and going from our other yards and distributors.

I don’t know how I am ever going to remember all their names. I told Bff last night I am going to just call them all Buttercup. I know a few of them but not many, until I figure out who everyone is (probably 6 months a year from now) they all can be buttercup. I can’t give them all nick names because that would require remembering who they all are again and it takes a while to do that. I would say I know who about 8 of them are out of the 60 or so. I have always been horrible with names. I take that back maybe 12 of them so far I know. That is between the guys that work inside with me the owner the yard guys and the drivers. But there are 60 divers alone.

I met one last night when I went out to the office where the yard guys are. He said do you have thick skin, because you are going to need it to work here. I said I’m good I’m use to it. He said there are three languages spoken around here, trucker, something else and sarcasm. If you don’t have thick skin you won’t make it. I said oh sarcasm, I have a shirt that says sarcasm level expert. He said what who? I said I do. He said oh really now, game on, challenge accepted. I said okay. He said I got to go but I will be seeing you around or talking to you on the phone. We will see how it plays out. I just laughed.

Wait until I start calling him Buttercup, I may have to come up with something even better for him, because I couldn’t tell you his name when I walked away. I shook his hand told him nice to meet you. He said you say that now but you don’t know you just met me. The guy over the yard said oh no it’s alright she is being trained very well and she already knows more than some we have had here for years. More common sense than most.

The other night we sat down and went over a bunch of our trucks and where they leave from and their rout. Now that I have this all written out and can see it, it is all starting to click and make a little more sense to me. As far as how to load, weights, and dealing with all the other little whatever problems come up I think I can handle that all pretty well. It is just the knowing where the trucks are and going and the order. Also learning all of our stops and their names will help. Once I have that I should be okay. I think by the end of next week I should have most of it down pretty good. I think for the most part if I was thrown in there and had to handle it I could get by and do alright. I think I would learn a little more a little faster as well. But at least I should be able to handle it. I may have to make some calls and ask some questions but the guy training me is making calls and asking questions all the time because like they said your not going to know a lot of times and have to find the answer or figure one out if there is no one to ask. I can do that.

{December 21, 2018}   Fat Ass

I have no idea where fatass came from because it just isn’t a word I use. Fat anything is not something I say ever hardly. So I am still very confused. But this is what happen anyway.

One night last week Mr. To Broken called me he talked to me pretty normal for a bit. Then he started on the other night when me him and Bff were talking and I went off on him and tore him a new one as he put it. I have no idea what he is talking about because the three of us have not been on the phone at the same time ever I don’t think, unless me and her are together and he calls one of us but we haven’t done that in months.

I was like what are you talking about? You got mad and went off on me about everything up one side and down the other. I don’t know what I did to make you made but you just started going off. You called me a fat ass. I said I don’t know who you are talking about but it wasn’t me. I have not went off on you at all and if I did calling you a fat ass would be the least of the things you would be worried about that I said and I never say fat ass or use the word fat hardly ever. If I do it isn’t calling someone that. I am big about not calling people names and calling out their size and things even if I am pissed off at them. Calling names is a huge pet peeve of mine. He went on and on about how I did and he hung up but heard me say it before he hung up.

I told bff about it and she is like what is he talking about? I told her the same I have no clue she would have to know about it too because she was supposed to of been on the phone when it all happen and was said and we were laughing about it together. But he wasn’t mad at her just me for saying it and us laughing.

A few days later he called and I was with her and he was going on and on about this and saying all this. I said look I would not say anything behind your back I wouldn’t say to your face and if I had said it and you came to me and asked me I would say yeah I said it now what? But I am not going to say sorry for saying or doing something I did not do. Later he messaged bff and she ask him what was going on and what he was talking about and told him she had no idea what he was talking about either she wasn’t on the phone with us. He started about how we were both there and all this. She told him that isn’t even something she would say and if she said something should tell you she don’t care. You don’t need to be in the middle of it, it has nothing to do with you don’t worry about it he tells her. She like but you say I heard it and I didn’t. He said I am not talking about it with you. I know she said it I hear her in my sleep yelling at me and saying it all the time and can’t get over it. I said you say there are two or three people that have went off on you one of them was the one that said it not me and I didn’t say anything. You need to really think about who you were talking to. It was you and I am really mad at you blah blah. I said oh well I know I did not say it or go off on you so I don’t know what you want me to say or what your looking for. He got mad I wouldn’t say sorry stroke his ego I guess. Then later he was talking to bff she said maybe you dreamed it you said something about in your sleep.

Then he sends me this message he is sorry just been so stressed. Saying sorry but not really. Again trying get me to say i did it. I never even opened it. Like the next day he blocked me.

Like I told bff I don’t care that is fine with me. I told them both that night i was not going to be done that way i was not speaking to him no more. I am not going to be acquiesced of saying things I didn’t say and told I done all this and him telling people this that isn’t true. She said just tell him it’s okay and blah blah because he is the way he is and what he may do as much as he says this is bothering him. I said nope not doing it he is going to do whatever he is going to do rather I say okay or what because no matter what he still feels I said this and is mad about it. I don’t care what he does I really don’t think he is going to do anything anyway he would have to get up and leave the house and he isn’t going to do that.

{June 10, 2018}   A New Page

Not sure if new pages that are published show up when your looking at your list of followers and what they posted or not. So I figured why not let you all know. That I posted a page with a list of who is who and how they tie in. This way if your not sire who I am talking about or who someone is you can look and see. I know I have forgotten some will add them as I think of them and will add new ones as they come up. You can always ask and I can let you know and/or add them to them to the list.

{May 6, 2017}   Starting To Wonder

It is amazing the things you start to put together when you just take a day and do nothing at all but lay around? I went to bed around 11 last night it is almost 4 and I have done nothing at all but sit around here looking at my phone or computer or sleeping. The kids have been watching tv, sleeping or playing on the computer.

I started thinking about this mess with Father of the Year, my sister messaged ask if he came by gave me any of the money he owed me or anything. I told her no and what happen Thursday night. We were talking about it, she asked if I had a way to get a hold of him or if he still had me blocked and not giving me his number. I said I still had no way to get a hold of him. I am wondering now if she didn’t block me not him and that is what she thinks she is going to force me to do? It isn’t going to happen.

Then I was thinking about it and Wanda did not block me, I can still message her and she reads them but no one ever responds because I sent her a few at the be gaining. She did just what her ex’s new old lady did to her to me, she had him change his number and not give it to her, she blocked her from contacting him any other ways as well, when ever she wanted to see or talk to the kids or needed something from them about the kids she had to go through his old lady not him. The only difference is they had the kids she did not. Well I got news for her I will not be going through her to get a hold of him about my kids or anything else that I may need to get a hold of him for. I got news for him I will not be doing that either and if he wants to see or talk to my kids and for sure thinks he will ever take my kids I will have a good number for him and an address for him. When I need to get a hold of my kids or him about my kids I will be doing it through him not her. If either one of them have a problem with that then he can forget having my kids or seeing them and if something happens when they are with me he can forget knowing anything about it until he decides to contact me because I am not going to be contacting her or his family to track him down and get a message to him. The courts say he has to give me his number and address if he wants to take my kids just like I have to keep mine updated with him. They do not say I have to go through his whore it says I to let him know he is to let me know. That is how it will be or else he won’t be seeing them or having them.

{February 6, 2017}   Going To Bed

I guess I am going to go to bed, I came here with a couple things to to tell you all tonight and now that I finished my first post I have no clue what they were. Maybe I will think of them tomorrow but who know’s. I am extra tired tonight and I am not sure why, but I have been going every since I left for school at 1030 this morning. Then dealing with my sick Little Bitty most the day today on top of it all.

She has been in a lovely mood to say the least, I had to talk her into going to school for a few hours just so I could go to my class. Before you give me the mother of the year award or tar and feather me for sending my kid to school sick to make other sick let me say, she is not contagious or I would not have sent her. She keeps getting something like swimmers ear and that is what is going on again. When I got up she wasn’t up or dressed yet, when we were telling her to get up and lets get to school we were going to be late she was having a fit she wanted to stay home and sleep all day. I finally just decided she wasn’t going to go I was going to have to call my teacher or go in and let him know I wouldn’t be there today and hope he didn’t get to mad. We got to school to drop Little Guy off and she gets her lunch and decides she wants to go to school. I told her I was going to stay home with her if she felt that bad. She said no she was okay if I was going to come pick her up right after my class she would go for a little bit. We got out almost 30 minutes early I went straight and picked her up. They were just laying down for nap time and she was thrilled that I really came. We spent the day together running around. We went down to the down town area and checked out a new thrift store walked around looked at some of the shops. We went past the tattoo shop I asked her if she wanted to get matching tattoos? She said yes she thought we should get tigers. I said okay sounds good, then I said you could get one that says mommy and I could get one that says Little Bitty. She said no I like tigers. I said okay we can get matching tigers. She said no I want a tiger you get Little Bitty. We were walking along I said well we are done looking guess it is time to go get them tattoos. She said oh um maybe tomorrow would be good for that. I said but you said today lets go, she kept saying no I think we should wait until tomorrow and going on and on. Then she said but it will blood and it will hurt. I told her it would not bleed that much if at all and that it didn’t hurt. She said well I’m scared so maybe tomorrow and every day I can say tomorrow. She smart kid I’ll just say tomorrow every day. She is so funny and cute.

I am off to sleepy land I hope, maybe I will think of the things I wanted to tell you all. If I do I will let you all now I figured it all out.

{January 17, 2017}   Not an X or Y but a Z

The other day when I was talking to my mom and she started about me changing my name it pissed me off. Why would I not change me name back to my maiden name? Just because my kids have that last name I do not see why I should keep that last name. She says it makes things easier, I don’t know what things she thinks it makes easier, nothing I have ever had to do does it matter if my last name is shit and theirs is blue. No one has ever questioned it. Me having a different last name than them means nothings, proves or disproves anything. What am I supposed to keep that last name to save some kind of face? Or so people won’t know I am divorced or because some may think I was never married? I just don’t get it. She says so that if someone ever had to get a hold of me because of the kids if something ever happened. Well most everywhere has my name and phone number so that shouldn’t be a problem. If they don’t then I don’t know how they would find me to start with and if they were able to my last name isn’t going to make a huge difference because where ever they got their information to get a hold of me from would have to have both our information and know that I was there mother. I just don’t get what the big deal is. Please tell me someone if I am missing something here where this would make a huge difference?

When she started about the kids and said all my kids have the same last name and then… I stopped her and told her no Little Bitty did not have the same last name as the rest of my kids. She said something about she didn’t know why I went and gave her his last name or something like that talking about RC. I stopped her again and said no she don’t have his last name either she has mine. She again started about I should have just kept my name the same and gave her that name too. I said why would I give her that name she isn’t an X nothing to do with them not related to them. She said well she isn’t a my last name either. I said yes she is and she kept on that no she wasn’t and all this. I was getting really pissed off and I just shut her down and said I got to go and got off the phone because it is none of her business number one, number 2 again what is the big deal? and three how can she say she is not an Y when I am a Y and she came from me? I said she is both Y and Z just as much one as the other because I am her mother and RC is her father. She still tried to argue with me she was not.

If you do a DNA test on her or anyone for that matter it is going to say they have dna from this person and this person. The mother and the father. In that case the mother is from one family and the father is from another family there for she has two families dna in her. That would make them a Y and Z. Not any part of X dna would show up o she would not be part of the X family. So why would you give them X name and how can you say that she isn’t a Y or Z. She says she isn’t a Y because that is my families name not her fathers that technically she would be a Z but since he is not in the picture and she don’t know that side of the family then I should have just given her X name and kept X name and she would just be an X. I agree he is not in the picture and she don’t know that side of the family so then why give her that name if he isn’t going to know that side. But then at the same time she is also a Y so why not give her that name since that is also what she is and sine she will know some of that side of her family?

Really while writing this and thinking about it more I think it is again her own issues and things she did in life and she again thinks everyone should do things how she did them and they aren’t so she is mad. Maybe I will write more about that tomorrow or another time, I have to think about this a little bit.

I truly love to hear your feedback on this one and if I am missing the bigger picture here some how on why it is so important that I should not have went back to my maiden name? And am I wrong that she is a Y and Z and could have either last name sine she is? Or should she be a Z since that is her dads name? And not have my last name since that is my family? Can’t wait to see the responses I get on this because I really want to know if I am wrong here.

{January 17, 2017}   She Liked It

I was logging off to go to bed and thought of something I was going to post about earlier and didn’t. I had not told my family or anyone but a few friends that I cut my hair all off. Father of the year came over the other night to drop off money and seen it. That was it, I hadn’t heard from anyone else I don’t know if he said anything to anyone else or not. I figured if he did I would have heard something from my mom or my sister.

Today I got a phone call it was him wanting me to come outside for a minute. I went to see what he wanted and why he was here. It was him and my mom she brought $20 over and gave me. I don’t know why I told her I had all that I needed here and that I had a little bit of money left. I don’t want to borrow anymore from anyone unless I have to for something. But she did, I figured oh well that is fine but come Friday she can look at him for it back because I don’t have it to give her back and I am not taking it out of whatever he decides to give me. I have a water bill this week that has to be paid, rent that will be due soon and gas to buy.

When I walked out and over to the truck the first thing my mom said was turn around let her see my hair. So I turned around and showed her the side and back of it. She said oh I like it, it looks really good. I was shocked because she never has anything good to say about anything. She always finds something negative to say about everything or why she wouldn’t have done this or that. When I have talked about cutting it short in the past she always says it is going to make you look fatter. It will make your face look fatter. I could tell by the way she said turn around and let her see the back Father of the Year must have told her that I cut it all off. I can only imagine that conversation. I was surprised he said he liked it when he was here but that was all he said and ask when I did it or something. I just said Tuesday I was bored and wanted something different. He said oh.

I still think that him or my sister has said something to her about what I said Christmas about not putting up with no crap and telling her like it is or leaving or they have said something to her about me saying all she ever has to say is something negative about everything. Because she has been to nice lately or just not saying anything at all. Seems very odd to me and I know it isn’t going to last. I just find it interesting.

Oh and I know it isn’t going to last and she is trying because the other day, she said she lost her school ID. I told her to go get a new one so she could use her book voucher and get in to take her test. She said something about the cost and not having it because it and her bankcard and some others are missing. I said it didn’t cost anything and that if it did they would put it on her account and take it out of her aid money she is getting. She said no they wouldn’t or something like that and how much it was. I said well when I changed my name and got a new one they never asked for any money or even said it would go on my account. They just gave me a new one.

She started yeah I don’t know why you did that anyway that was stupid and thats not my kids last names and something else she started to say. I said yes it’s Little Bitty’s last name. She started about that I just shut it down and got off the phone. It don’t last long and it kills her when she is being nice I know and you can just tell by the way she says things and acts.

{November 29, 2014}   Dogs or Frogs?

The other day I posted about our dog having puppies. If you missed it or want to see the kids new buddy, you can read about it here First Day of School & New Puppies.

Anyway to start with father of the year said all 3 were girls the night she had them. I didn’t mess with them much other than moving them from the shower where she had them to the case to keep them safe from the baby and in a known spot for mamma to feel ok with. The other night a friend comes over and he was looking at them and we were talking about them. He picked one up and was petting it and I said something about them all being girls again. He looked at me and said um no this is a boy. I was like what no she had 3 girls. He turned him around and showed me. I hadn’t looked at them at all. We hadn’t had them out and messed with them more than moving them to fix their blankets and things. I was surprised. So now we have 2 girls and a boy and someone that wants a girl and the kids had already picked the one they wanted to keep.

I said oh well I guess father of the year is going to get a boy so the people who wants one can have a girl. I wasn’t making the kids give them their dog. Well the people went and got another puppy they didn’t want to wait the 6 to 8 weeks for this one to be ready. We had talked about him keeping two so that one wouldn’t be alone all the time when he is working if he was going to keep one. When he found out that the others weren’t going to take her he said he would keep them both. So now he has a girl and a boy. The kids had been asking him and asking him what he was going to name the one he was keeping he said he didn’t know. Then we figured out the one was a boy they kept asking and wanting to name him. He kept saying no no no and that he didn’t know what he was going to be like yet and wouldn’t let the kids name him.

The other day when he was off I went out with a friend to take care of some stuff and just get a break and get out of the house. I get home and the kids say daddy named the dogs guess what he named them. I really had no clue wasn’t sure what he would have named them. They said he named them Roxy and Trevor. I thought they were joking but they weren’t.

I said they can’t be Roxy and Trevor we already have Roxy and Trevor they are my frogs the kids got me for mothers day I wrote about there. My oldest says oh it’s ok it’s better name for the dogs and it isn’t like we call the frogs or play with them like we do the dogs anyway. I looked at father of the year and said your really going to name them that. He was like yeah I like it I think its a good pair name for them. I just walked off it isn’t worth getting in a fight over. I just find it funny that he can’t even name his dogs with out having to have it tie back to me some how. Pretty pathetic really but I guess I shouldn’t be surprised he has kind of always been that way. He is never interested in something or likes something unless he finds out I am then he acts like he has liked it all his life or something.

He use to bitch about Fords all the time and how he didn’t like Fords. I got a little Ford Ranger right after we got together. I didn’t really have chose in the matter I was on a very tight budget and needed something to get to and from work in really bad. I had bought a car from his friend it died right a way and no one could fix it. I gave it back and stopped making payments on it. A friends girlfriend had the truck for sale and it was only up for the weekend and after that she was keeping it if it didn’t sell. She needed the money for something and if it didn’t sell by Monday she had to do something else to get it and wouldn’t need to sell the truck. I knew it ran and trusted where it came from so I jumped on the great deal I could get. I don’t know why but I loved it and loved the way it ran. I liked it was fairly simple and easy to fix. The fact that it didn’t cost a lot to fix it and easy to find parts. Over all it was just a good truck.

Since then I have had a Explorer and two Expatiations one I am driving now one I sold a few months ago. I want to move up to a Excursion when I can. When I got my first I was talking about stuff I wanted to get for it and things I wanted to do to it. My friend and her sister was talking about wanting to fix their Expiation and explorer as well.  We were joking we were going to start our own Ford girls Ford club and stuff. All of a sudden he wanted a Expatiation too and wanted to do this and that to it. I said something to him about not liking Ford and how he hated Fords. He came off with some bs about how all cars and trucks were pretty much crap but we got to have something to drive. I said well then why not another truck like you had and claimed you loved so much before we got to gather that you keep talking about you wish you could get back or find another like it. It was a Nissan or something like that. I don’t remember but it wasn’t a Ford I know that much. He didn’t say anything and just looked at me like he didn’t know what to say and he knew what I was getting at.

I hate it and its weird really that he is that way. Really now that we are not together and haven’t been for so long and aren’t ever going to get back together. I always felt like I couldn’t have my own friends, interest, hobbies and things like that because he always do that. It seemed more like to get at me I can make you be with me all the time or always be around just not ever take you out or do things with you kind of thing. He could say he did because he was there or liked the same stuff. But really it wasn’t that kind of things that we were having problems with. All comes right back to control I think at the time I just thought it was his lac of being able to make and keep his own friends and not wanting to be alone. I really don’t think that is it at all any more. I think it is all just part of his twisted little games.

I think if he ever finds a girlfriend she would love to know where his dogs got their names from. I’m sure he will have loads of fun explaining why he decided to name them after his ex’s frogs. I’ll be sure to make sure she knows how he got the name for them too. It isn’t even like he can say he liked the show and watched it even. Again it was something I liked and use to watch. He seen maybe one show out of each season that’s it. He probably couldn’t even tell you who’s who on the show much less Roxy and Trevor.

et cetera
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