Here and Healthy

I haven’t been on in awhile, with all that is going on with this virus and everything closing things have been crazy. 3 out of 4 kids ended up with the flu. Not sure how me and Mr.9 did not get it (knock on wood) but I am happy we haven’t. Everyone who had it is over it now and going stir crazy.

We are under some kind of stay home order, I don’t really know the details. I have to go to work and am the only one who drives and able to get us stuff so life is pretty much normal for me. We haven’t been going out on the weekends. Everything is closed as for entertainment. People are still going fishing, to the beach, boating and other outdoor things.

I go to work shop once a week and go see my boyfriend after work and before I go if I have time. We get lunch or dinner and go to the little store. Everything to eat is take out nothing is open to eat in. We get it take it to work or back to his place.

The kids are getting set up to start school on line come Monday. That should be loads of fun with a 1st grader. I think Mr. 9 should be okay. They have packets they could pick up and do but I already did this. If it don’t work i am just going to tell them we need to change things. They say schools are going to go back the 15th of next month. I don’t believe it. I think if they were they would of just sent some packets home not set this whole online thing up. Not for what 15 days or less. Why go through all that trouble for a few days? I don’t know depending how things work out they may just start homeschooling with the older two. Little Bitty can’t wait to start hers online tomorrow. She wants to keep doing hers at home. I just may if my job works out.

Robbed The Elementary School

A month or so ago I borrowed a little bit of money from the driver at my night job that I am friends with and talk to all the time. I told him I would have it back to him on the 12th of this month. Well he was out on the road that day. I told him I had it and he said he would be in the next day to give it to him then. I ended up not going to work the next day and he was still out as well. I messaged him and asked if he was going to be up in my area any that night or not and that was when he told me they had not made it back in. He said they would be in around 8:30 or 9 to the yard. I told him I wasn’t going to work but to let me know I could meet him. I just have to drive down there. He said they would be at the truck stop by me around 8 or so. I could meet him there. I told him that would be fine to give me a head up when he was headed that way not to wait until he was 5 minutes out and expect me to rush over there. He called said they were about 20 minutes out. I went over and met him. Jw was with me because I was at his house since I hadn’t went to work. So he met him when he came to the car to get the money.

Night before last I was at my night job and him and his partner came in to start their run for the week. He was having trouble with the computer in the truck and things it was telling him he didn’t have anymore drive time for another 10 hours or more. But he hadn’t been on the clock since Thursday. He was calling back and forth trying to get it fixed and things. He kept calling me I told him I can’t do anything they have to fix all that from their truck now I can’t adjust any logs like we use to. Before I could fix them and they couldn’t but they changed it a month or two ago and now they can but I can’t. He was asking me things and telling me stuff. He got pissed off because he wanted to know who used his truck and why they were using his number and what was going to be done about it and why wasn’t I looking it up and trying to get to the bottom of it.

I finally said look your right if they are using your information that is a problem because things like this happen and now you need to drive out and have no drive time. But there is nothing I can do about that right now. All we can do is fix the problem at hand that you have no drive time things need to be changed so that you have your drive time back. We will fix that right now because that is the biggest pressing issue right now. Then tomorrow or in a few days or when the other dispatcher gets back I will get with him and see if we can find out who was driving your truck with your information and why and take care of that and put a stop to it. But right now bitching about it and going back and forth is dong nothing but wasting your time and mine and getting nothing taken care of. All we can do is fix what we can take care of what we can get you on the road because you need to be gone or gone very soon.

Okay but this and that. I said no this or that, I truly can not do anything more than what I just told you and that is pretty much nothing but look up and see where you guys are all at at any given time. Because I have not been shown how to do all that you are asking me to do just as I told you a few minutes ago. So go fix what you need to fix and do what you need to do to get yourself on the road and I will get someone to look into this further. I have no other answer to give you no matter how many times you ask or how many ways you ask I still have the same answer. Well something about my answer. I said well if you don’t like my answer and don’t like getting the same one over and over again then stop calling and asking me the same thing or going in circles on the phone and asking the something. I have told you what I can do for you but I can’t do anything if you are going to refuse to get off the phone and do what you need to do to get out of this yard. He got mad and hung up. Fine just how they are some of them you can’t get off the phone until you piss them off and they hang up because they think you really can do what they are asking or just trying to make shit harder or what on them. Sometimes the other guys in there with me can do shit and just won’t . But they haven’t figured out yet that what ever I tell them I tell them because that is just how it is and I can’t tell them anything more or do anything more for them. They think I am just shitting them around or not wanting to do my job like the rest.

In a little bit here he come walking in the back door. He come in there where we were all at and was talking to everyone. He was like I’m sorry but this is bullshit and I don’t see why you can’t do this or that and they look it up and tell me where I been my whole trip every stop I make and everything else but you can’t tell me where my truck was for 30 minutes on such and such date and who was in it. By this time I had gotten with one of the others there and had them tell me how to go in and look things up and see part of what was going on, that was what we were doing when he waked in. I said come here and look at this, you see that, that is your truck, this is Friday and your truck never moved a inch in this yard all day that day. Your telling me it did all this and there is no log and even for Saturday there is logs of it moving but that is less than 0.1 miles that is around the yard moving it out of the way or they were using it to move trailers around. I said all this you are telling me is not on there. So that is another problem in of itself that I now have to figure out how to take care of. So we still can’t fix anything more than what you can do in the truck until I do. But I am trying to figure it out and I am doing what I said. I just figured out how to do this and had someone show me when you got off the phone finally. This going around on the phone gets you no where.

Then he was all I’m sorry I’m not mad at you I am mad at the company blah blah and everything. I told you that on the phone it isn’t you I’m just mad about everything. I said well you need to figure out who to bitch at because if I tell you something I am telling you for a reason and you know if I don’t know or can’t find the answer I will tell you that not just tell you what you want to hear or some bullshit that is going to be a problem down the road because it wasn’t right. I know i know he say.

Well the other guys that were in there with us walked out back for something and it was just me and him in there then. He asked how the boyfriend was or something. I said good I had just seen him before I got there or something. He said was that him with you the other night? I said yes. He said dang he is young isn’t he? I said no he is older than me. He said he sure don’t look like it, he looks like you went down to the elementary school and was like here little boy want a cookie. I said your an ass your not right. He said he does he looks really young. i said nope he is 2 years older than me he has grown kids.

He said something about not really knowing each other and things. I said we have known each other for at least 35 years or so. He said what? I said yes we grew up together. He said then why would you do this and risk messing up such a long friendship? Something about a booty call. I said no no it is nothing like that at all. I said I would not have done something like that just a booty call. I said we have been talking for a bit before we even decided to try anything more and talked about it a lot before because we have been friends for so long. He said why him out of everyone you talk to or have talked to then?

I said I don’t know, I said you know they say it is the ones that you least expect or never would of thought of. I said it is like that. I said because we did grow up together staying at each others houses when we were little, ball games, birthday parties and outing. He was just always there and then he moved away in our teens to live with his dad. When he came back he had kids and things and we all hung out together now and then with friends but the same it was just like old times the last several years. The thought still never crossed my mind. I was with someone he was with someone we were just there. I said but then we started talking this last time because we hadn’t talked in a year or so, (one of those don’t talk all the time but pick up like nothing when we do kind of friends) hanging out as friends catching up and things just kind of happen and went that way. I hope that it last because I don’t want to mess up a friendship but I also do have feelings for him and I am happy with the way things are with/or between us.

He said that was cool he was happy for me, he knows how hard I work and do all I can for the kids. He is happy I found someone that makes me happy and that he hopes it works out. That he was sorry again for getting so bitchy on the phone it wasn’t me he was mad at and things. And that it still looks like I robbed the cradle.

I told Jw when I got to his house that night what he said about robbing the cradle he thought that was funny. Last night he shaved and was saying he missed a spot of didn’t like something he was going to have to do it again or touch it up. He said he could just shave it all off and something about how he would look or how he looks so much younger when he does. I said oh nice really make me look like I went to the school to find a man. He just laughed. I said and in turn what you all are saying is I look old. He was like no, no, I didn’t say that, that isn’t what I meant or how I meant it. You don’t look old. I laughed so hard at him. I said yeah I know I was just giving you a hard time. He was like that isn’t funny I wouldn’t call you old or say you look old. I said oh so you just think it then? He like I’m going to shut up because you are just twisting what I am saying all around. That is not what I am saying at all. I tell him he is just to easy to mess with. I said you know because kids are just so easy to get over on and mess with.

Back To School, Maybe

I am thinking about going back to school next year. I received mail obe day last week from the school talking about going back and different options there are. They had grade forgiveness and something else I thought I maybe able to get in and get my grant and things back. If I could do that I would just take two classes at a time. It will take a little longer but I think I could handle it and pass them with decent grades not just slide by with C’s and be happy with that. When I started and was able to put tine into them and before accident I was getting A’s and B’s.

A lot of it has to do with my accident because it now takes me more time to do the work than it did before. I have to read things over and over and really think about what it is saying and put it all together and make it make since. It takes me longer to do the work and projects as well.

Where as before when I didn’t have to take all the extra time to read it a dozen times and then to go over it and think about it forever and a day to make it make since I didn’t need as much time to get things done.

But now I can work on it in the day at work and at night as well. I can work on it in the evening on the weekends after the kids go to bed. I am going to have to miss a little work to take a few classes at the schools but I can’t help that I can’t take them on line. But I think both jobs will be alright with that of it is minimal. I think most will be in the mornings so just the day job. If I can work it good enough then I can get out of class and not be late or just be a few minutes late if I can get into an early morning 8 am class that is less than 2 hours.

I will worry about that latter first I have to see if I can make it to the meeting and if I can get back in without costing me over $2000 out of pocket to do it.

Shelter In Place

I drop the little kids off at school and ran oldest to the store before I headed out. I was going to run to the store to pick up lunch and stop to get my coffee of course. I wasn’t in a rush I had an hour and half before I had to be at work.

As I left I seen a sheriff car pass me and go toward the school. I thought it was a little odd because we are in city limits and it would be local police that would go. But I figured no big deal there could be any number of reasons it was going and went on. Not thinking anymore of it at that point.

I went picked up my coffee and headed to the store for lunch. I got my wrap made and picked up a half gallon of tea. I got to work a little early was thinking about eating a little of my lunch and getting my day started. I pulled in the guys were here getting ready to leave. I thought they would of been gone but they weren’t. One was on the bus the other was in the office. I opened up put things away and got ready for the day. I went to sit down and check the phone when I pulled my phone out of my pocket and notice I missed a text.

I read it and it said that the kids school had been put on a shelter in place but it was over and they were going on with normal day. They said there had been a threat made online against the school.That is great they checked things out but who is to say that nothing is going to happen later in the day or as the kids are getting out of school?

The one came out of the bathroom and said he was leaving. I said so am I, I have to go get my kids. He said what your leaving too? I said yes but just for a little bit. I will probably be about 10 minutes late. I told him what I got on my phone. He said he would call Pops and tell him to come in. I told him if he wanted but we should be okay. He said he was going to call him. We walked out and I locked up we all left.

He asked if I they were going to give them to me or I was going to be able to get them? I said I don’t know what they are going to do or say but I will be getting them. I got all the way home and to the school and noticed I walked out and left my purse at the office and of all days my drivers license. I remembered I had a picture of it on my phone. I hoped they would let me pick them up with that. They let me get a pass to eat with them and everything with it. I figured they were already going to give me a hard time about checking them out and then tell me because of it all I had to have it not a picture. But I got there and just told them I needed to check out this one and that one and they called them to the office pulled their paper and had me sign it. They never asked me for my license at all. I was not sure how I felt about that but when I told her and she was getting their papers she called them by last name and knew who they were. I think they know me as well since we have been there every day for the last two years.

I don’t know what to think. My first reaction was to go get them then I thought no everything will be fine. But then I thought about how scared my little one was and how much the drill upset her last year and I didn’t want her sitting there knowing they thought something was going to happen or was. I thought I know most nothing is going to happen but what if I don’t bring them home and it does happen? I would rather be safe than sorry.

The kids were all excited to see me and ran up to give me a hug. They were asking why I was picking them up. I asked them what they did so far today and they said school work and telling me what they done. I said did you have a drill or something like that. They said they sheltered in place but it was just a practice like all the other times. I told them no that it wasn’t just a drill that they had a threat something might happen at the school and I decided to bring them home for the day.

Mr. 8 said oh thank you mommy you are so good for worrying about us and trying to keep us safe. I am glad they weren’t worried or scared. But at the same time I think they should know in case something happened they would know what to do.

The Daily Four

Over on a Guy Called Bloke’s blog he has started a post he calls the Question Fun Directory or the Daily Four. I have decided to answer today’s questions. So here goes.

What was the worst thing you did as a child?

Growing up, what was your ideal dream job and did you bring that to a reality at all?

What were the things you both liked and hated about your schooling?

Where there is a will, there is a way! Do you agree?

 

What was the worst thing you did as a child?

It was my birthday I think maybe 6 or 7th. I don’t know I was young so I am surprised I remember it. But my mom and dad was there and they threw a party for me. We were at our house and there was a bunch of kids there. There were two boys around my age and a little older. They were my moms good friends kids and she use to babysit them for her. They had spent the night or weekend with us why their mom was working or away. So they had some things there other than just being there for the party.

Well one had his skateboard with him and we were out in the street in front of the house playing with it. I was laying on it pushing around with my hands and things. He decided he wanted it back. I wasn’t done playing and he kind of dumped me off in the street.

We end up standing in the middle of the street with the skateboard upside down. He had one set of wheels and I was holding it by the other set. We were pulling it back and forth fighting over who got it and trying to get it away from each other. I got it away from him and held it up and hit him on the head with it.

I think I still remember this to this day at 38 years old because it was a birthday party for me, I don’t remember having to many parties with friends. My birthday is the day after Christmas. I also do not remember my mom and dad being together and doing anything or my dad living with us ever even though they didn’t get divorced until a few years later. And my dad spanked me for hitting hi in the head and sent me to my room. It was my birthday party so everyone was having fun I was in my room with a spanking. It is the only time I ever remember my dad spanking me and that was probably worse to me than the spanking it’s self, or missing part of the party or anything else. Because My dad just never spanked me or got onto me for things. I was close to my dad and I wasn’t a kid who got in trouble often and he just talk to me or say something about what I did and we would go on.

Growing up, what was your ideal dream job and did you bring that to a reality at all?

I have wanted to be a counselor and work with teens or teen parents, addiction things like that. While I haven’t yet I have started schooling for it and hope to get started back next year and finish.

What were the things you both liked and hated about your schooling?

I didn’t like school very much at all. I felt that we shouldn’t have to take math, science, history and all that in high school. I felt we should be taking classes geared toward the careers that we wanted to go into. I still feel that by jr high/ high school we should be teaching our kids or have them in classes working on the path they are wanting to go into. I think at this point the other classes are a waste. I feel the same with with college we shouldn’t have to take math, science and all that then either to get a degree. But anyway that is why I hated school.

The only thing I really liked about school was it got me away from my house and a chance to see my friends. I wasn’t aloud to do a lot when I was younger and didn’t like having people over to my house because I didn’t want them around my mom and things the way she was.

Where there is a will, there is a way! Do you agree?

I 100% agree with this so many people make excuses because they don’t want to put in the work to get to where they want to be or have what they want. If it isn’t quick and easy they give up.

Confession # 4

I bribe my child, yep you read that right, I bribe my child to get up, get dress, and get to school on time without throwing a crying fit every morning. If you read my blog you know I am not one to deal with kids misbehaving, giving them their way or anything like that.

But I can not deal with the the winning and crying and fighting in the mornings. She hates getting up early and going to school. She just isn’t a morning person. I try to have them have her in bed by 8 and that helps some but not a lot. By the time I get home at night it is so late that it don’t mater at that point.

At school they can buy ice cream for fifty cent or a dollar. They always want money to buy ice cream. So I have made a deal with her, if she gets up and dose not cry, fight or make us late then I will give her money for ice cream on Friday. She wants it more than just Friday. Friday does seem like forever for a kid that little. I told her today maybe I would give her money on Wednesday and Friday if she was good. If she gets up good Monday-Wednesday I will give her it Wednesday then I will give her some one the way to school. Then Again Friday if she is good. If she has a bad day in between there then she has to wait until Friday. If she has more than one bad day she don’t get it.

My Mr. 8 almost 9 I hardly ever have a problem with him at all. Every once in a while. Mostly if we have a really late night or he isn’t feeling good. Then he don’t give me to much of a hard time. He will just tell me he don’t want to go or what but if i tell him he has to he gets up and goes. If he really fights then I know he really isn’t feeling good and probably shouldn’t be going. He likes to go.

So there is my confession for the day. I love my kids and do not believe in bribing to get them to listen but sometimes you just have to pick your battle and admit defeat.

Kind Of Good News

So today at work one of the owners came in and was talking to me and Pops. He said his son is going to start working here with us. Pops is wanting more time off he is having a hard time standing for long periods of time anymore. Plus he just don’t feel like coming in sometimes. He is 75 after all and just took this on as part time to have a little extra money to go out and help the guys out. But we have days that we are slammed and he is here all day instead of an hour or two or half the day. Then some of the work he has to stand the whole time and he just can’t anymore and it takes him longer to do he work because he has to take breaks.

But we are not to a point that we needs someone all day everyday or even to say we can hire someone a few hours everyday. We stay steady most the time but then have days where we have no one or a couple things. Right now I think the shop side breaks even or just under breaking even.

Me and Pops were talking about it the other day and we really can’t hire someone and tell them you might get 5 to 10 hours a week and we don’t have set hours to give you we just want to call you when we need you. No one needing a job can really live on that and it really isn’t worth it to drive over here for. I said I would not mind learning some of it to help give him a break.

The boss said today his son was going to start coming in after school and working a few hours to help take the stress off Pops. He is also trained to go out on the bus with the guys to help there if there isn’t school or a weekend and they have something.

So he will come after school if we have things to be done and get it all ready for the people to pick up the next day. Pops can come in during the day if I have things that needs done for the day or he can’t get it all done or something. But this should give him a much needed break. It works out great for what we were talking about since he isn’t needing the money to live on and all that it is just gas money or what for him and he still lives at home. He just a kid.

It really don’t change much for our customers other than maybe instead of being able to get it back the same day they will have to wait until the next business day. Now I have a rule if they get it in before 1 or 2pm they can have it back after 3 that day. This way I will just start telling people unless they set it up ahead of time with me it is next day. Because we have some people that come 20+ miles to get their things done and would like to wait for it or get it back as soon as we can get it done. We can still do that if they let me know before hand they are coming I can set it up that Pops will be here to do their stuff.

We are always changing but not changing at the same time with that part of things. But people don’t mind because most are shocked they can get it back after three the next day much less the same. They expect to wait a few days to get it back anyway. So I just go by what is going on that day. Like if Pops is busy even if it is only 11 or 12 I will start telling them the next day because we are busy and have work to get out by three already we had to start bumping things until tomorrow. I have only had one or two people complain and they were just that type of person they have something to say about everything you can tell. But being the only place in the county that does the work we do people have to understand that sometimes we get busy. We do everything we can to get it back as quick as we can but that is not always possible and we are getting back quicker still than what we are told we have to get it back. When I started I was told I could tell them anywhere from 2 to 3 days up to a week to get things back depending what it was but at the least tell them 2 days for everything. Once I got in here and seen how busy we are and how long it takes to do things I was able to get it to after 3 if in by x time that day or after 3 the next day if after that time. Most the time really the after 3 the next day could be picked up in the morning after we open a lot of times. He will get them done in the evening before we close. But this way he can have time to get to them if we are busy and he isn’t having to stand there until he can hardly move to finish them after the days work is done. He comes in around 11:30 but then if he has doctors or something not until after lunch. Plus if I am running late or have to come in late for something there isn’t people sitting here waiting to get their things back first thing in the morning. We have some flexibility if we need it or something unforeseen happens and we have to take off to take care of it. We can get someone to come in and cover or time to get here. We don’t have a lot of people coming in to drop off in the morning if we miss someone they understand things happen. But I hate to give someone a set time to come back and not have something ready or not be here and I don’t want a rush of people when I am trying to open. because I find I tell them after 3 and they will come at 12 or 1 or 2 and say I need to get my stuff or I know you said but I just wanted to see if it was ready. So if I tell them 12 they will be here waiting on me or trying to get in why I am trying to open or return calls and things in the morning and a lot of our drop offs are in the morning. This way I don’t have a lobby full of people.

The owners don’t care they told me do things however you feel works best for you or the shop or however they need to be done. We just own it your the boss take care of things. It works nicely.

I Do Not Want To Adult Anymore

It is 11:45 am and I am still laying in bed. I have said for 2 hours now we have to get up. But yet here we still lay. My whole body hurts from head to toe. Not just the normal I feel 10 years older than I should move on with your day hurt. This is I feel like some one has spent the night stomping on me my bones hurt kind of hurt. I truely don’t know why. I just want to toss everyone out of my bed stretch out and sleep. But I want someone to massage the back of me from head to toe first for about an hour. Then do the front of me for about half and hour.

My little ones need to be in bed in about 9 hours so the can be rested for the first day of school. How they are going to do that when they aren’t even up yet. We need to get showers and eat once we get up. Then go to the store for last minute things and food for the week. This is what I am really avoiding right now and putting off. Going to the store. I have to do it first and it is packed with everyone else running around doing their last minute shopping. I was in for a few yesterday and could not get out fast enough.

Then I still have not figured out what to do with the older kids. My oldest wants to go I just don’t see it happening over there. I can’t see either of them going there. I see her getting picked on because she don’t know anyone. She don’t stand up for herself and don’t tell anyone not that it would help over here or at her age.

Mr. 13 with his disabilities I know they would pick on. I seen how they treated the kids when I was there. I can only imagain what it is like now. The way things are in schools now. We are talking a few 1000 kids or more. My 9th grade class was 500. We had 9-12 normal high school. Now they have 7-8 grade so even more kids. The younger ones like Mr. 13 mixed in with the high school kids. Don’t work for me. He won’t care but oldest will. She is going to be so mad I can’t blame her. But she don’t understand. She was already bullied when she was younger and it was bad had horrible effects on her. I’m worried with all that has went on the last few years and things she has said that if it happens it will end horribly because she won’t say anything or tell.

I honestly wish they could just take their GED test and be done with school they are such a mess around here.

I see moms posting online about their kids being picked on what to do school won’t help. Seen yesterday a teacher fired for talking about the demons that were in the bathroom and being a student’s spirit father and another’s husband and lying on his paperwork to be hired. If the school had checked his paperwork then they should of caught the lie before they hired him. Knew something was wrong. This is the school I was going to try and get the kids into instead of where they are supposed to go because it’s is supposed to be better.

I hate to think what it will be like for my little two coming up by that point.

It is now after 12 I really need to get them up and get our day started. Or we won’t be ending it until tomorrow and that will make for a dreadful first day of school morning.

Can We Skip JR High and High School

The school my older two kids are supposed to go to is horrible!! I went there and it wasn’t great then, and they have made changes and it is worse. The put the high school and Jr. High together. They already had rapes and things there after I left. They had a some really bad fights when I was there.

My first week of 9th grade they almost killed one of the older kids. By our 12th grade year they did kill a guy I went to school with since we were kids. The one who done it was aloud to come back to class.

The year after I finished they had rapes and other things they covered up. I seen how kids like my son was treated. I have been trying to get them scholarships but they have been saying pending for weeks. Now I finally get to half way talk to someone and they said they wanted paperwork. No where did it say paper work or they needed anything from me when you log in and check the status of your application. It just said pending so why would I think i needed to do anything. I went and looked around and it says I need this list of paperwork to turn in. I had went there before looking for something and it didn’t say anything either.

I finally got everything they wanted turned in yesterday. I just found all this out a day or two ago. Now I am waiting to see if they say it was to late or they get it. The thing is school starts Monday.

I just went and done all the paperwork for my little two today before work. I was happy I didn’t have to do anything but the paperwork and they didn’t ask for my two proof of this and that and shot records and physicals. I guess they have it all from last year I don’t know I really don’t care at this point. I am just glad they didn’t ask and I don’t have to find time and money to take care of more stuff.

But I have no idea what to do with the older two kids. I feel like I have dropped the ball. One wants to go to school the other don’t want to but he don’t want to do what he should be at home. Why can’t we skip jr high and high school and just go right to college? It would be much easier. Better yet why don’t these fucking people get their shit together and make the schools safer and better for our kids. I don’t know what to think or do. I guess i have failed my kids, and ruined their life.

 

2019 Goals

Not sure if my pages will show up in the reader or not so I am going to leave the link here.

2019 Goals