{October 2, 2019}   Men…..Need I Say More

Why is it men feel the need to explain things or clarify things anytime but when you want them to?

I can’t count the number of times this has been said to me.

Why do guys always start off with…..I’m not stalking your page but….

dude if you seen something you like or want to know about just ask. 99% of the time we aren’t going to think anything of it. But when you start off with I’m not… but….you guilty as hell and lying through your teeth 😆 sounding like a 5 year old um I was doing what you told me in the living room but I noticed the cookies on the top shelf in the back of the pantry that’s in the kitchen. Can we have one🤣

For real why do you feel the need to tell me you haven’t been stalking my page if you really haven’t? Telling me you haven’t been seems as if you are feeling guilty. But anyway.

Then yesterday I left my day job and headed to the night job. I followed this little convertible with it’s top down over the bridge. There was a guy driving. When we came off the bridge we ended up right beside each other at the light. He was in the far left lane and I was in the right lane next to him. I never looked at him I was doing something not even thinking about it really and he starts revving it up. I see what he is doing and I decide not to l look and he just keeps on getting louder and louder every time. I never did look over and the light turned green. I went and got over right in front of him. He was so mad he turned off and went the other way. I passed him again a few blocks up the road back on the road we were on to start with and going on.

A car with a dealer licence plate don’t impress me. It has a dealer plate he is either test driving it or probably work there and had to take it to get something looked at or something to go do and slapped the plate on it and went. Even if it didn’t have a dealer tag the look at me, look at my car, look what kind of car I have or I am driving mentality does nothing for me. It takes a lot to impress me and what you have or can buy isn’t going to do it. If they have that mentality of look at me look what I have or can buy the odds are their personality isn’t going to be doing much impressing either.

These guys try way to hard. But I guess that it what they have come to expect that most or a lot of these women want. The whole I’m not stalking your page thing don’t bother me, I just find it really funny because I have had I don’t know how many of them say it to me mid sentience when we are carrying on a normal conversation. Why not just say what was this or that about or that picture was a nice picture?

Like the guy I work with at work asked me how my sons party went last night we talked for a bit. He knew about it from facebook. He didn’t have to stop and say I’m not stalking your page but I seen you had a party over the weekend for your kid. He just ask how the party was and where the park was.

{February 25, 2019}   Don’t Text Me Anymore

Before I got off work Saturday Sleeping Beauty messaged and asked if I could take him home. Of course I told him yes because I wanted to be able to really talk to him about what was going on and why I asked him to call me.

I got off a little late he told me to meet him at the lot he works at so I did. We went across the street to get gas and drinks. He started asking me about what was going on. I told him well you know how everyone bailed on me last week, I went to the concert by myself. This guy started talking to me and we been talking since. He said don’t you know that you don’t go to things like that to meet people? I should bend you over my knee and spank you.

I said I didn’t go to meet anyone I just went because I wanted to go and he started talking he seemed alright I talked to him. I said I wasn’t trying to get with him or anything just talking. We got our drinks and gas and headed to take him home.

We were going along and talking I told him the rest of what happen what I told him and everything. He to asked if he had been to my house I told him no. But that he knew where I worked and had been to my one job. That he had been to Applebee’s with us on Wednesday. We were talking.

He said if something happen or he bothered me he take care of it. He said I just have to find out who he is first where he is. I said I know who he is and right where he is. He said you do? I said yeah I told you we have been talking and he went with us. I picked him up and dropped him off. I showed him the picture that I had taken of him and I together the first night when we met and I dropped him off.

He said I know who he is! I just had this sinking feeling. He said well don’t know him but he has been around with friends when I was with them. I said oh no! Just felt this hopeless sinking feeling. He said what? Don’t worry about it, if he does anything or starts bothers you it will be taken care of. I still have people that will take care of it. They aren’t going to not take care of it if he is messing with you. He said your okay he isn’t going to bother you.

Yesterday me and the kids went to Bff’s house for dinner. I asked him if he wanted to come and he was going to look at the truck. I dropped the kids off at her house and then went to pick him up. We stopped at the store to get gas again and all of a sudden I got a text from Sailor boy. He asked how my teeth were feeling. I didn’t reply he asked if or how that stuff that he gave me was working and then sent ??? when I didn’t answer any of that. Sleeping Beauty said just tell him they are doing good or what and go on. So I did, I said it was working and they were better. later last night we were at Bff’s house and he messaged me again.

He said awesome

hoard for you to scream omg it’s so good with sore teeth.

I never answered then he said my cooking

what were you thinking. I still didn’t answer.

Sleeping beauty said you have to say something before it goes further he saying that kind of stuff. I said that is normal stuff for him. He said you need to tell him to just leave you alone. I said yeah but what do I say? I mean I know I need to tell him but I feel I needed to give him a reason or what. I don’t know. With no reason he is going to want to know why or keep on. I am a need a reason for whatever it is when it comes down to it. So I feel I should give someone a reason for whatever I say or do or tell them.

Sleeping Beauty took my phone and sent him a message. He said I am sorry but I with someone.

He just replied really now okay later.

Things got crossed I guess. Sleeping Beauty said now and later don’t text me no more. I’m sorry are you mad.

Why would I be mad I don’t do drama bye.

lose my number.

I haven’t heard from him since. I don’t know what he is thinking or if he is going to just go away. I told him I wasn’t seeing anyone. Everyone seems to think that he is going to show up Wednesday and it isn’t going to be good.

If he comes Wednesday and says anything to me I am going to tell him look you lied to me about your background. I looked you up and I can’t have you around me and my children. Just take it from there.

{February 23, 2019}   Get a Hold of Sleeping Beauty

So we will call this guy I met Sailor he has a sailboat so. Well anyway Bff asked boss from the tranny shop if he knew him. He said he seen him before or something. She told him he knew him from the car lot he worked at back when. She said something else he said wait he did all the computers for them and took car of all that for them. He said yeah he remembered him but didn’t know a lot about him they had a problem with a car and him he took it or something.

He asked why? She told him I met him last weekend and then what I found out about him. He said it was bad. He asked right away if she had been around him if he had been to their house or mine. He told her we needed to get a hold of Sleeping Beauty right away. Was my first thought but then called my other friend because I wanted to see if I could get a gun from him. He told her of we go out Wednesday night we need to take him with us.

I said why do we need to get a hold of him? Why did he go straight to him? She said because this guy isn’t staging or fronting he done this stuff he knows what he is talking about and he has all these charges. He knew he uncle, dad, sister and old boss. Old boss seems to be the only one that remembers him. But her uncle looked him up said with his charges and all the computer and hacking he knows he is very dangeres. I said I know I have already told you this. I already know all this been saying it you don’t believe me. I have lived with the DV and taken classes trained in dealing with it.

But I wanted to know why he felt we or I needed to get a hold of Sleeping Beauty? When he was so against us talking and always making comments if he thinks we are or have been. She said he told her he could handle him and know how to take care of him and if he needed to he had people he could get a hold of to get it taken care of and he would.

When I got off work I rode with her to the store and tried to get a hold of him. I had not heard from him since last Friday night. When he said he wasn’t going home then never got a hold of me about going Saturday.

I messaged ask if he was up then ask if he could call me. He didn’t answer then I tried to call him he never answered. I messaged again and said can you call me asap things are not alright.

Finally this morning he messaged me back and ask if I was okay.

At this minute i am fine. But i need to talk to you about something that maybe/turn into a problem.

He ask what I ask if I could call him it was a lot to put on text.

He ask what it was about said please tell him what it was about. So I finally told him someone I may need help getting to leave me alone. He wanted to know who. I just told him a guy i talk to for a few days.

He ask what he was doing and things. I just told him call me when he got a free minute it was to much to explain. He said okay. He asked if I was working. I told him yeah I am here until 7 to call or stop by. He said okay. If I don’t hear from him by the time I get off I am calling him. He said he isn’t working he is working on his friends moms car. I am going to ask him if I can stop by and talk to him.

So like I said in my other post Bff and J’s hubby think this guy I met Saturday is just great and such a nice guy. I am just looking for something to be wrong with him or an excuse. I keep telling them no there is something about him. Like I said I can’t decide if he is just full of shit or what. They are all give him a chance this and that. I said let me get to know him I don’t know him to decide or give him anything. I’m not expecting anything. I am going in no expectations of any kind. I just can’t get a good read on him. Most people you just know or they are easy to figure out. But he is just i can’t figure out what it is about him.

Today I thought I had and even bff said yeah she thought I was kind of right. I told her he is just to all over me, into me or whatever you want to say. Just oh your this and that your eyes, just all the stuff he has said.

But I told her if he isn’t just full of shit then he is akaward in ways because of how he grew up. He is use to only having people around because of the money. No or few real friends. We aren’t waiting or asking him to pay we are talking to him like he is an everyday person or what. So I understand some of the things that have been said or what.

I was starting to relax a little. But there was just something that made me feel really uneasy when he stopped at work today. I thought just because i was at work I don’t mix work and personal. I still wasn’t expecting anything just felt like i figured things out a little bit.

Tonight I was sitting at my other job writing and things. Something just said look him up. I started not to but I did. I knew he had some traffic stuff but that was it really. I don’t know what I expected to find really nothing other than that but I had to look.

Holly shit I was not expecting to find what I found. At the top was traffic stuff. But then it went on and a divorce came up, then another I think 2 or 3 plus the annulment he said he had.

Then domestic violence, stalking; cyber stalking, and sexual this and that. A charge of something over 65, dv with kids, dv with out kids, violation of injunction, arrest for out of county stuff, a baker act and a committed to long term care baker act.

I just sat there with this sick feeling in my stomic and the thought of what do I do? How do I handle this? I called bff and was like this is what I just found!!!! She was like omg he was with us we were hanging out with him. What are you going to do?

My first was call him confront him ask him about it. Tell him i know now he is full of shit and stay away from me. I did call he never answered. I messaged he hasn’t messaged back. I have not heard from him since about 6 something.

But I don’t know now if I should just wait just stop talking to him. Tell him i am seeing someone i have been talking to we decided to get together give it a try or what.

I just want to be done no problems but i don’t think it will be that easy the way he talks about me and things.

I called my old friend I haven’t talk to in months to see if I could borrow a gun but he didn’t have one. He said he looked kind of creepy. I said gee thanks, but he said maybe he was young, maybe he had some girl putting him through hell or he was going through some shit. Maybe he is alright now doing better or changed. I said no over over repeat vilation this that. He said dam girl you better back away slowly. He got some problems. I said I know, all i was doing was standing in a field and tried to be nice talk to someone who talked to me. He said i know why i don’t even try to find someone or want to be with anyone. I said i don’t either now. He said something about his boat. I said no I didn’t go out there at all I’m not stupid. He said probably some kind of torture chamber or something. I said yeah no shit. He says his daughter lives out there on it with him. I said to him and bff before that I wonder who is really out there? What is going on.

Now he knows where I work, both jobs and that I am at this one alone and in the back. He has been all through there. They have someone they know come in they bring them in my office they sit and talk. I told him come back sit we walked out the back door he sat there and smoked. Then he left.

Bff thinks I should say something to my bosses at my day job so they know what is going on in case something happens. I am so embarrassed and feel so stupid. But I thought they are federal cop they are probably the best ones to ask for adive. They know me won’t blow me off. Think I am crazy I hope. They dont know me outside of work so who knows what they will think if i tell them this. I told Pops Tuesday about meeting him. I told him I didn’t know what to think about him. I couldn’t decide if he was full of shit or alright. He said all you can do is talk to him get to know him. Nothing wrong with that.

I have to decide what to do. Talk to my boss or not and how to deal with him. I told bff I told him I was stood up by her and other friends and I said something I think about a guy was supposed to come too. He said something about how could he stand me up he be with me any chance he had or something. I should say look I have been talking to this guy for over a year we decided to get together and see where it goes. He had emergancy out if town he just got back. Hope he just goes away. She thinks he is going to start showing up where we hang out. I told her if he does and comes over to us I am going to tell him sorry I told you already I can’t talk to you I am with someone. Then if he won’t go away or tries to start a problem i will call the police get them to make him leave.

et cetera
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