{July 30, 2014}   Slowly Falling Into Place

It seems like everything is slowly falling into place for me and the kids to finally have our own place soon. I posed a few weeks So Very Blessed about how I had sold my truck, getting a washer and drier and things. First quick update on that. The washer was a very simple fix. Someone had dropped the lid to hard or slammed it. It in turn broke the switch. Well didn’t break it. It just came apart so it wasn’t letting it work right. My grandpa was going to by pass it and just forget it but got to thinking that if once of the kids tried to use it that they may get hurt because it wouldn’t shut off when you open the lid. So he screwed it back together and fixed it right. Father of the year and a friend went down and picked it up so I didn’t have to rent a trailer to get it home.

The guy got the truck working for his wife and they are very happy with it. It is nice not having it sitting here walking around it in the way all the time.

Since then more has been happening, the other guy at father of the years job quite in the middle of his weekend on so he has been working a lot of hours the last few weeks. So that is helpful once the checks catch up and start coming in. We will finally be all caught up with bills this Friday I think. We have to pay car insurance and the water bill plus a small loan he took out this week. But I will have about half the loan to pay back. I had a friend who needed to borrow a little bit of money I knew I was already going to have to get the loan so I let them borrow that. They are going to give it back Friday as well.

They also still need a wrecker driver at work. They told father of the year that he could move up to wrecker once he had been there a little bit. This next week or so will be a year that he has been there and they have yet to move him up. I told him go back in and ask them again why they won’t move him up. So he went in and talk to them and they told him as soon as they find someone to take his place and he gets them a crash course they will move him up and train him. They said is pay won’t really go up much they get a percentage of each call. They said the number of calls he gets will go up plus the cost of each call he goes on goes up by a lot. Instead of being like $35 calls they will be $100’s of each call. Plus they say they get tips more often and a lot better tips. They get millage as well and sometimes they have to go across the state and back. He should be making a good amount more.

I have found a babysitter for the kids that is willing to work with me on hours and price. She knows I am homeschooling the kids so all 4 will be here. The kids love her and she loves the kids so I am sure they will have a lot of fun. She has known my kids since I was pregnant with them. I have known her for about 12 years. I don’t know why I didn’t think of her before I see her all the time just never really thought about asking her. We ran into her last week when we were going to therapy and something said hey ask her so I did and she said yes. With him getting moved up I should have a little more to pay her too. He tells me well when I move up we rotate days off so I will probably only have like one weekend a month off I will get the kids then and the other weeks get them whatever two day’s I’m off. I told him no that wasn’t right I shouldn’t have to keep planing my life, my job, my time and activates around when he is off and is or isn’t going to have the kids. That visitation needed to stay the same and he would need to figure out what he was going to do if he had to work the weekends that he had them. Just like I am going to have to find daycare for the time that I have them if I have to work. Why should I pay extra daycare and plan my life around him and make it easy on him? He said ok but he would like ot have them when he is off as well. I told him that was fine he could have them other times of the week if he wanted and we didn’t have plans. But he had to take them our set days and times as well and he had to do their school work with them the days he had them.

Maybe I am wrong but we are not together I don’t feel I should have to change when he has the kids every week to make it easier on him. I hope to have a pretty set days and times I work so I can plan things with them to do, so we can get school work and things done, and so I can plan things I want to do when I have time and they are with him. I don’t want to every time I want to plan something go oh wait let me check with my ex and see if he is off so I can. Not happening.

If he moves up and is making more than he should have no reason not to move out and get his own place. I told him he should start looking and needs to start saving and he got mad. But oh well the truth hurts. He knew this was not a permanent thing. It wasn’t supposed to have lasted this long. I have started looking for places for him. I have even found him a roommate. I told him the other day I found him a roommate he said ok. I told him who it was he said that would probably work. I just want to get him out of here as soon as I can.

He is also supposed to be seeing about taking his week vacation sometime the next week or so. He is going to see if he can take it after he gets his replacement trained before he starts tow side. That way we can get to the court house and get the stuff with the divorce taken care of. I will be so happy to have it done and over with. We have things we need to get done around the house.

I have been feeling a lot better than I have been the last 2 or 3 months. Knowing that things are turning around and that hopefully he will be moving on very soon. Like I said here in Put On A Good Show, it will slowly kill you having to live this way. Yeah I get up every morning and plaster on my best fake smile and put one foot in front of the other but what is inside is not able to keep putting on the show. Hell I don’t even put on a fake smile to tell the truth everyone tells me all the time I need to smile. My friend said the other day I would say you look good when you smile but I don’t think I have ever seen you smile. But it is nothing new I can remember from way back people telling me I need to smile more. I had one teacher I use to walk by every day on the way to school she always say something about smiling.

I got to stop because I know now I am just rambling. I know there are a few other things going on the few days weeks but I really can’t remember what. But it’s all good and it is all coming this way for a change. Maybe I should go play the lotto I fell lucky.

{December 13, 2013}   Not A Lot Going On

It has been forever since I was able to write and it sucks. I tried to set things up on my phone so that I could but it isn’t working to well. I think I was able to fix it now that I have gotten on my computer. I have been so busy the last month or so. With moving, little bitty and the other kids. I don’t know where to start.

Guess I will start with moving it was the last thing I posted about I think. We had a place lined up but couldn’t get in until a few days after we had to be out of our place. Instead of spending money on a truck and a storage room and then a truck again in a few days I just got the largest truck and packed everything in it and went and stayed at my friends. The kids were at my moms except my two little ones. I figured it would be cheaper to keep the truck a few days than getting it twice and paying for a building for a month when I only needed it a few days. Well they strung us along for almost a week and lied about running the credit report and things. Then told me that we couldn’t get in because of stuff she said wasn’t a problem to start with. I had to put everything in storage and find somewhere for the animals. We are now at my moms again. That in itself is a post of it’s own I’m not even going to go there.

The kids got into the stars of tomorrow program at our local playhouse they are excited about that. They do their first program this coming week. I have screwed up big time with everything going on. I haven’t put in for our tickets. I have to go there first thing tomorrow and pray they let me get out tickets or I am in a lot of trouble. Pray that they understand and I have time to get them still.

I feel like I have lived at the doctors office the last month or so. The two little ones got pretty sick and had to go. The baby had to go back because she wasn’t getting better. Then she had to go again for a well check. My little boy started telling me his belly hurt and crying in his sleep and telling me it hurt when I wake him up so we had to go for that. She gave him some stuff to take for two weeks we have to go back Monday for that. Big girl brought home head lice for the first time ever and gave it to me and the boys. She has had it 3 times in the last few months. I am so mad about that because the school don’t care and don’t try to see if anyone else in the class has it. I had to take her to the doctor for that. She better be rid of it at this point. It don’t seem like the doctor trips are going to end. Baby goes back in Jan for another well check and the big kids go back in Feb for allergy testing.

My little bitty is getting so big and she is so smart I don’t know where the time has gone. She just turned 8 months on the 4th. She is pulling herself up and walking across the front of the couch holding on to it. She has been running everywhere in her walking. She will fallow me to the kitchen and if she is hungry she will sit there and tell me um um um yum yum yum. If I don’t get her something she gets upset. I can get her something and tell her come on and she runs after to the other room for me to feed her. She is to funny. She still only has her two front teeth on the bottom but is wanting more and more off the table. She is about done eating baby food. She had the whole thanksgiving meal off the table. She loved it. If we are eating she refuses to eat the baby food and wants what we are eating. Sometimes she will even if we aren’t eating. She is up to 14 lbs 2 ft 2 in as of the other day. She can still wear 0-3 months clothes. But they say she is growing on a curve her own curve but on one so they are not worried. They keep saying she is just going to be petite. the doctor was surprised she rolled over and waved to her as she went out of the room and told her bye. She said she is very smart and very advanced on her motor skills.

We had to give the ferrets a way. Part of the joys of being where we are. They were told they could keep them but then had to get rid of them. A friend I grew up with took them so they are at a good home and they can see them now and then. They may get them back if we get a place because they may move out of state the first of the year. I told them that if they got rid of them to let me know I wanted them back if I was moved and had room.

Proud of the both my big kids they are doing so good in school. They both have A/B honor roll. My big girl is one A from having all A’s and principles honor roll. Not sue if she will get it or A/B this time around. Feel kind of bad but she had science project to work on and turn in in the middle of moving. She only got a 70 on it but she got a 90 on her presentation. Not sure how that will average out in the end. I told her to ask for some extra credit to bring the grade up but she has had so much homework the last few weeks that we haven’t. But I am not to worried about it because I know she will have it pulled up and back to an A or B by the middle of next 9 weeks.

That’s about it nothing great other than their program I can’t wait to see. I am more than glad their last day until after New Years is next Friday. We can all rest and relax after the last few months of stress and change.


{May 27, 2013}   Haven’t Forgotten

I haven’t forgotten you all I miss being on here and having a place to get things out. But with out internet it is hard for me to get on here. I can from my phone but I went from one that I was limited to what I could do to one I can do just about anything on, to one that is a huge POS. It wont go online most the time shuts down ramdomly (mostly when Im in middle of something) and eats half of the stuff I try to post places or post it 10 times. I have been writing my post so I can post them when i can get online hope soon.

Its hard to get anywhere to use the net with two little ones now and last wednesday was the older twos last day of school.

I am trying really hard to get in the swing pf things with the new baby and a 2 year old who still wants to be the baby. The baby alone is hard and being the only one doing 100% of everything for her is very hard. she is with me 24/7 I have had no help or break for even 5 mins with out her since I had her. Dont get me wrong I love her to death but im wore out. Her father has his head so far up his girlfriends ass its sad. he is in such a bad situation if he wanted to take her see her help out some I would have to say no. She wouldnt be safe there. I think he knows it and part of the reason he has only seen her once in 7 1/2 weeks. but he needs to be a man and get himself out of the situation he is in and be a dad to his kids. Ok i have tp leave that alone because that could be a book there is so much crazy there.

On top of dealing with him and his crazy the new baby and the situation I am in right now Friday my son drops a bomb in my lap. That makes getting out of the situation I am in a must and need to ASAP. I have no clue how when I am not even getting call backs about jobs. I dont even know what to say to my son. Nothing is going to fix things just have to get out and help him through.

if your seeing this then yay my phone didnt lose connction eat it or shut down. I will try to ad little quick updates more offten until i can really post like I want. thanks to all who are all still here and reading.

et cetera
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