{September 8, 2018}   Guess Who Never Called

Thats right you guessed it Father Of The Year never called to meet and see the kids. I gave him a time and day. He just had to call confirm it and what park. Did he no didn’t even bother to try. We know he has a phone because boss was trying to message and call him on it. So can’t use that as an excuse. If he didn’t when boss told him he could of used his. He would of let him.

{September 7, 2018}   I’m Not Dropping Them At The Park

I have been thinking about father of the years boss saying he wants to see the kids. Him saying that he wants me to drop them at the park so he can talk to them about his new wife and accepting her and him not being around, paying and all that will come up too I am sure.

The more I think about it the more this seems like a really bad idea. And me going with them and hanging out isn’t a good idea either. Because the two of them can push buttons and try to start shit with me to get me in trouble. If I am alone and its just them and the kids I am pretty much sol if they start.

I may have said it before I don’t know but they can say what they want about me to people, they can do what they want to me, but they will not get my kids and lie to them about the last year and a half. They will not take my kids and try to convince them or push them or make them feel bad and guilt them into or force them into accepting her or agreeing to come over there when they don’t want to.

If him or them start lying to my kids about what went on or why he wasn’t around or telling them they have to accept her, they have to go over there or anything like that it will get bad. Because I will set things straight right there and I will tell them they do not have to do anything they do not want to. Just like he did not have to see, pay or do anything for them the last year and a half because he did not want to. That he is only paying now because his boss in making him not because he wants to now and that if he was 100% honest with them the only reason he wants to see them now is because he thinks it will get me to drop the child support with his boss. It is not going to happen.

I can see the two of them trying to start crap with me to get me in trouble and I am to the point I don’t care. If they start and it comes down to a fight then so be it. Because I am not scared or intemadaited by either of them. I have new for her, if it goes so far as I get a hold of her they will be hard pressed getting me off of her and she will be hurt. Because they are dragging my kids through more bs just because of their own selfish reasons.

I was talking to Bff and father of the years old boss about it the other day. I told them not only is it wrong but my kids want nothing to do with her. If they are made to go over there then all hell will break lose because when he starts abusing them like he did when he was around and she starts in on them. My older two will snap on her. My son who is autistic is close to 6′ and 175lbs. He is pushed and feels attacked and backed into a corner he will fight. He has never hit anyone but he blows up and if I had not stepped in the other day when him my mom where fighting I am afraid it would of come to blows then. I am working on finding somewhere to start taking him to therapy again to help work on things. He is hitting those teen years and hormones are starting to kick into overdrive. They are not going to get him over there and start on him until they push him and something happens then they try to say or do who knows what. He is not going to end up with charges or some baker act or something like that over something like this that is out of his control and because of some adult messing with him and pushing him starting with him. I will not let that happen.

She is that way and would do it in a minute it just to try and get at me and to keep them from coming over there. Because she don’t want them there.

I am going to try and find someone to go with me if I have to take them to meet him or them at the park. Because I am not going to be alone for them to try and pull something. If they do try and pull something I have a witness and I have someone to kind of help me stay cool and not blow up.

My friend juggernaut said his cousin would go with me. I do not know him but I may take him up on it if it comes down to it.

But the more I think about all of it the more I see it turning bad quickly. Depending on how ballz they are feeling. I can see them not really doing something straight foward to start but passive aggressively doing something to start. Part of me says she is to scared of me to do or say anything but part of me says they are just that nasty they would if they think it would get them out of paying support.

So it is the 3rd I have not heard from Father of The Year or his boss. I finally messaged his boss and asked if I could meet up with him. He said yes, we were both out and about so we met up at the little store. He gave me the money and it was $50 short. I ask him about it he said he thought that was what we agree to and blah blah. I said no it is on the paper. He said look at it let him know. I sent it to him again after I left it has the date and everything on it.

He called me back later of course I had the kids in the car. Said they had agree to what he gave me that by time his rent comes out and truck what he gives me he only has about $200 a week. I said well you know that is on him he decided to not pay all this time and get behind. I said I am lucky to bring home $600/$800 a month and I have 5 people to take care of. He said 5? I said me and 4 kids 3 are his.

I said I already am giving and compromising enough because he is supposed to pay half of all their medical bills, half of their clothing, school supplies and anything else they need as well. So yes he needs to pay what was agreed to and put in the letter. I said and for that matter he is supposed to be paying for a baby sitter every weekend that he don’t have them. I said he is supposed to have them Friday until Monday if he don’t he is to pay a sitter if one is needed. I said but instead my 14 year old is forced to do it every weekend for free that isn’t right.

He said well he didn’t know about all that and he knows what he has and all this and it be this way or something. He was going to talk to them again and things. I said well you know like I said it could be costing him a lot more than the little he is forced to give. Because if I go to court they are going to make him pay this plus half of everything else.

Then he started about he wants to know when he could see the kids. He wants me to drop them off at the park with him and his new wife. I said my kids already told him they do not want to be around her and want nothing to do with her. I said and no one has ever said he could not see them. I said he has been able to see them whenever he wants he decided not to. I said June or July he seen my oldest in the store ran and hid then promised her he was going to come see her he was going to start paying and that they would see him on their terms not his it was up to them. I said the weekend came and went he never called or showed. Weeks later when we seen him same thing he couldn’t talk he get a hold of her this weekend. He never did no one seen or heard from him and that was over a month ago when I talk to you that first day.

He says he made the comment he wanted to see them if you bring them to the park and he wants to talk to them. He wants them to accept her that is his wife now and things. I said the way she did them and me they want nothing to do with her. But they will see him. I said and this does not need to go through a 3rd party he needs to come to me set this up not this back and forth with a third party. He said I think you scare him and intimidate him. Bah ha ha. I said well he needs to grow up act like an adult and if he wants to see them pay what he is supposed to and then contact me himself and set up to see them.

All this it is like I am being looked down upon and just want his money. They act like I just want it to go out and party on and blow. Like I told him every penny of it goes to the kids. It isn’t going anywhere else. But then I am made to feel like I am wrong for expecting him to pay his part so kids have what they need and want.

This right here all of it is 100% why I have not bothered with trying to get anything from him. Its just run around after run around. Then he is going to start and force them to see him and have her there. Try to force them to go over there.

If I had thought of it I told him he had an option to get it of it all. He can give up all his rights and keep all his money. But he don’t want to. I compromised by taking the amount we agree to and now he wants to cry over $50. No done.

{July 12, 2018}   A Talk With Oldest

When I got home from work tonight me and oldest went up to the little store. We were talking about seeing father of the year today. We were talking about them seeing him and things.

She said she didn’t want to. She said he needs to start bringing money weekly like he said he was going to and go file the paperwork that he is supposed to file and go to court first. She said he hasn’t wanted anything to do with them in a year and a half then he needs to prove he does now and going to be consistent. Because he never follows through and does what he says. He do it a few times and then half asses it a while and then nothing. She don’t want to let him in start working on rebuilding or getting close for him to start not showing up and then not show up for another year and a half again. I do not blame her one bit. I do not think it is unreasonable for her to say you need to prove you want back in and to do that you need to do x,y,z in a timely manner. Not when you “have time” or “get to it” like you always say.

I think she is also scared that if she goes with him now he decides to take them to his house, bring her with him to see them or make them stay the night or not bring them back I can’t do anything. Our divorce papers say he gets them every Friday until Monday. So cops would not make him bring them back. I can not really tell him he can not take them around her. And they have no real say if he tells them this is how it is going to be. But if I get full custody of them he don’t have set days times to have them it is up to me if they go for how long and when. If he takes them to his house with her they call then I can pick them up because paperwork says I have custody. If he picks her up they are out they call me. I can go where they are and pick them up because of my paperwork. Now with it the way it is I would still go but if they wanted to get nasty call cops it get ugly because papers or no papers, if my kids wanted to come home they would be. Unless I ended up in jail. And there would be huge chance of that happening if they got nasty something went down. So I agree with here he needs to show he is going to do what he said. If it has to go to court first for them to feel more comfortable seeing him then he has to deal with it. If he wants to see them before that then it will probably be supervised until it goes to court. We can meet at a public place because I don’t want him in my house anymore either. We can meet at a public place they can go do their thing i sit in the truck or what until they are done. They want to go eat i will drop them off go pick them up when they are done.

He don’t like it don’t want to agree to it then I guess he don’t want to see them and spend time with them like he says and has provem over the last year and a half.

She even said tonight he needs to give us money now not a little bit here and there. He owes us our checken money on top of the child support. She said you should tell him he owes me a babysitting fee because I am the one taking care of the kids every weekend when he is supposed to have us and take care of all of us. She is right he should. But I can not press for to much because then he will say fuck it or get nasty and fight for split custody. But I know how to work it so he pays.

I think I am going to tell him I will meet him Saturday to get the money and talk to him about the kids and seeing them. I tell him I will meet him a couple hours before work up the street. I do not want the boys knowing we seen him or talked to him. I also do not want them to know he is talking about wanting to see them.

Right now we are doing the getting together and seeing them on oldest terms and conditions. Because the younger 2 are not going if she dont go. Once she decides she is ready then I will talk to the other two about it. I will let them know he wants to see them, that he has met her terms and that they can see him on their terms and if they do not want to that is fine too. It will go from there.

{May 7, 2017}   The Fun Continues Tomorrow

I have done nothing this weekend but lay around, I am so tired from dealing with everything since what happen to the dog, what they did and the last few weeks of school. Then dealing with the kids and their attitudes on top of it all this week holy cow they are off the chain. I wanted to sit here look up what papers I need to file and watch something on tv last night after the kids went to bed. That din’t happen because as soon as they turned everything off and walked out of the room I passed out and woke up at 4 am. I got up and went to bed, I still couldn’t hold my eyes open.

I have to spend the day figuring out what papers to file with the court so that I can do all this again on my own since the child support place will not serve him at his job. They say they have to have a home address to send everything to and get a response back from him. It is no wonder so many people never get anything when they have these assholes like him that don’t give you addresses or bounce from couch to couch, motel to motel. But if I go to court and file all the paperwork myself and turn it in then I can have him served at work. He starts work at 3 so that is a few hours before the servers get off so they should have time to get him served. I just hope I get a judge that see’s him for what he is and does right by the kids. Not one that is going to let him start taking the kids and seeing them and tell me I have to start doing the back and forth every few days shared custody. I want to try and change the visitation and time sharing because they put in our papers that he can have them every weekend that is fine to a point but there are some weekends that I would like to have them since we are in school and working during the week. Plus I don’t want them to have to go anymore than they want to. Every other weekend gives the a little break, although I done told them if they do not want to go they don’t have to we will cross that bridge when we get there. Right now with him living in his truck it shouldn’t be a problem with him getting anything he wants but I don’t know if he got a place or what kind of place he got so I don’t know if he has room for them and things either. If he wants them every few days back and forth then I am going to insist that he has a place where the boys and girls have their own rooms and beds. I have to have that he should too. This putting them all in one room or same beds isn’t going to work.

I just hate trying to figure out what paperwork I need to get and turn in. They have all these packets for different things and lose forms. You have to figure out what you want or need to file and do it. They will not tell you, this is the packet you need or that packet won’t work because your missing this or that. They just ask what you want charge you for it and give it you. I can print them from home free but my printer needs ink and I have no ink or money for ink. I am sure I will figure it out I figured out enough to get my divorce and that was a lot more involved than this is going to be a and a lot less paper work. I know that some of it is the same paper work I had to do for my divorce. I just hate dealing with this part of stuff.

{January 18, 2017}   18 Years of Lies Not Doing It

You know my mom talking about me not giving Little Bitty my married last name and not keeping it myself is all because she thinks I should just do like she did and I’m not doing it. My mom had me right after she turned 18. Her and my dad got married sometime that year I am not even sure when really. Then about three years later she had my brother. Well of course we all had the same last name because they were married and we have the same parents. When I was in about third grade my parents got a divorce and not long after my mom remarried and had my sister. So then her and my mom had my Step dads name never seemed odd or bothered me that we didn’t have the same name. Life goes on and after a while they got divorced too when I was around 20, but they had not lived together for years at that point. She kept his last name after the divorce again no big deal to me never thought twice about it, don’t care.

In the meantime my brother turns 18 and decides to move out and go live with my dad and my mom gets pissed. She never wanted us to live with my dad and fought it every time he would try to go to court and get us even though I wanted to live with him from the start. When I turned 18 I went to live with him and she caused a bunch of problems and I had to go back to her house in order to finish school even though I was 18. I could have fought it my dad would have fought it but it would have taken months. It was December and school was out in 4 months and I would be finished probably before it all got settled. It was really pointless to have my dad fight it then, spend money and miss work.

Well my brother goes to live with my dad and she don’t want him to so she tries everything she can to get him to come home and he won’t. By now she had pulled him from school to “homeschool” him and they weren’t even do that at that point so she couldn’t use that to get him to come home. Really if he was in school and tried it I don’t think he would have came home anyway. He would have just quit school. But I wasn’t going to do that because I think that is part of what she wanted when she pulled it with me. I was going to do something she didn’t and I was proving her wrong by doing it. Instead of trying to help and make sure I finished and got the help I needed all she ever did was tell me how I would never finish and if I did it would never be with my class. At that point the only reason I stayed in school and finished was to prove her wrong and it meant so much to my dad for me to finish.

Anyway when she couldn’t find any other way to get my brother to come home she decides to drop a bomb that no one expected. She tells him that isn’t really his dad some other guy off in some other state is. That didn’t work either and my brother still to this day is pissed at her for lying to him all these years and wonders about it. The guy that is supposed to be his dad I guess didn’t want to talk to him meet him or anything like that. She went so far as to try and get a hold of him when all this went down. I guess he has a wife and kids and things and I don’t know if they know any of this or not.

I do not know what happen how she ended up with him 2 years after her and my dad got married, I don’t know if my dad knew and decided to try and work things out, if she did this and told my dad later or what. I do know my dad knew and that everyone else in the family knew from the be gaining. I guess she didn’t tell him, didn’t go after support or anything else because she didn’t want him to be in the picture, she didn’t want him to have any rights to him or to see him and take him for visits and things if he ever came around and wanted to. Her easy out was here if you are married when you have a baby whoever your husband is goes on the birth certificate as the father and they are the father until them or someone else proves different. So by giving him my dads last name and him being on the birth certificate meant that if this other guy every came around he would have an even harder fight to see him than if no one was on it. I know nothing about this guy other than what I have put here, I don’t even know his name or anything else for that matter. My brother was told who it was but for whatever reason I was never told. I never cared I was living there at the time and I stayed out of it. I was not around when it was talked about. I was just told that isn’t his dad and that was it.

She has made the comment to me different times about Little Bitty and her dad being able to come and take her and if he wants to see her them making me let him see her and making me let him take her off to wherever it is he is living now around whoever he wants and there is nothing I could do about it. Even told me if I went after him for child support she was going to be really pissed off. Like that is supposed to make a difference to me. No one ever talks about him or brings him up other than me and my friends when we are talking or what. I do not call ex daddy to her never have. She is the one that has pushed that and we have fought about it every since I had her. Now she is older she hears the other kids call him that so she does. It makes me sick but I know why she does it. When she says something about daddy talking about him, I tell her that’s not daddy that is Father of the Year. She calls him both. The kids have said something about him being her dad or what and I have told them no he is not her dad RC is her dad. My Big Boy questions it and don’t really understand. He was little when we lived there and me and RC were together. They did not know I was pregnant until we were split up and we had moved out of there. Then Father of the Year ended up living in the playroom all that time and being around so he just thinks that is her dad I guess. I don’t think he even knows how babies are “made” really so he isn’t thinking that something had to happen between us you know. We haven’t had that talk to in depth yet. Tonight he said my oldest daughter could just have babies and be a single mom if she wanted to she didn’t need a husband or boyfriend if she didn’t want one. I ask him how she was going to have kids if she didn’t have one or the other and he said just have them. I know bad mom we should of had this talk by now probably but he is him and not on level with other kids his age. He is starting to come around to where we need to have that talk I know.

But anyway I think that my mom thinks that Ii just needed to do things like she did and never tell Little Bitty or anyone else that RC is her dad. Like she didn’t tell my brother and let everyone and him think my dad was his dad. Well everyone but family and they all kept it a secret all that time. I am shocked that none of the family let it out of the bag way before she did. But things are way different with me and Little Bitty, her dad and Father of the Year. I was not with Father of The Year had not been for almost a year at the time I met RC. We have never been back together as a couple since then and have not tried to work it out or wanted to work it out. So why would I give her his last name and let her think that is her dad? And if nothing else she has a right to know who her real dad is no matter what. It is then up to her what she wants to do with that information. If she wants to one dad try and find him and meet him fine I am all for it and will help her. If she don’t care to find him and meet him or try to that is fine too. If he comes around and wants to have a relationship with her and she is old enough to understand and wants to ok if she don’t that is ok too. If he was to come around tomorrow and want to see her meet her have a relationship with her and be a dad that would be fine too we would work on that. Because they both have the right to have that relationship if they want to. It isn’t for my mom, my ex, my friends, other family or kids to say if she can or can’t if she should or shouldn’t. It isn’t for me to say she should or shouldn’t. That is there right. Was what he done right? No is how things have been for her because of it these last 4 years right? Not at all. Do people fuck up and make mistakes? They sure do. Should they be punished for them from now on no not if they are stepping up admitting to them and trying to fix things.

But I think that is her problem she don’t want him to ever be able to come in the picture and have anything to do with her. She don’t think I should ever ask for a dime of support and she don’t think that I should ever bring him up or tell her anything about him. It pisses her off that I am not doing what she says. Thinking about it while writing this I think that is why she made it a point to bring me money the other day when they called and were out front and she seen my hair. She keeps asking if I need money or need anything. When I went to get the money she said she split what she had left with me to make sure I had money in case we needed anything she didn’t want me to not have any money. I just shrugged my shoulders at her as I was walking around the truck because I already told her I didn’t need it I had a little bit and had all that we needed. I was aggravated because I know Friday I will be hearing how she needs her money back and be wanting it out of what he gives me. I don’t have it, I have a water bill that needs paid so it don’t go off and I have rent that needs paid so it isn’t late. I don’t want to keep borrowing if I don’t have to and have to owe out. I am trying to get everything and everyone paid off so that I can get on track and start saving. Living this way cost a lot more than being able to do it without borrowing.

But I bet she is thinking that the other month I went and done anything and everything that I could think of to get the money to pay things here and take care of what I needed to. She knows that we are scrapping by to get to next month and I am trying to find a job. But that didn’t matter before, she just call and say their bills need paid, he spent money on this or that and paid this or that and gave her money back so he don’t have any and she don’t know what we are going to do. I love how she needed paid back right away when all her bills and rent are being paid she has money in her pocket but she needed paid back right away what he borrowed form her. His kids could just wait until whenever he gets it and can do without. But then the last few weeks she has been making sure whatever I tell him needs taken care of gets taken care of and that I have a little money to get gas or soap or whatever we might need. While writing this I thought I bet she is worried I will go down and file papers and go after RC for child support. I couldn’t before because even though Father of the Year is no on the birth certificate because we were married they said he was responsible and would not go after her dad at all even though no one was paying anything for her. Something was said about Father of the Year paying support when I was talking to her and she said something about him paying it on all of them or for all of them. Then she said no he is only paying for the three of them and changed the subject kind of quick. I bet then she though oh the divorce is done now she can go down and go after him and if she can’t find a job soon and make it she will to get that to help with her and what she needs. She don’t want that for anything so she is probably trying to figure every what way to make sure what needs paid here gets paid and we have a little money.

I got news for her I don’t care what she does when I get ready I will be going down and filing against him for support. He should be paying and he will be. Just like now there are things I would like to do for her that I can’t because I have to pay everything else. If I was working then I would be able to take the money he has to give me and do the things I want to do for her and let her do the things I want to. Just like if I am working or have my part to cover the bills I am able to use what Father of the Year gives me and do things for the other kids. I just haven’t went down there right now because I have had school to worry about and I am trying to decide if I want to go to child support enforcement or file through the court. Right now I think the cheapest way for me to go is through child support enforcement but at the same time I think it will take forever for them to do anything. Most people it takes years. So I could go through the court faster. But then if they want dna test and things like that I don’t have the money to get them. I think I will go to child support and see what they say then if it seems like it is going to be no help or take forever I will go to the court house and file myself. Also if I go to court they are going to set times he can see her and take her and things like that. I really don’t think he is going to but he may. If I go to child support enforcement then they are just going to set up child support and tell him to take me to court if he wants to see her. If he wants to take me to court then he has to come here and take me to court because this is where she lives. I know he isn’t going to do that.

But yeah that is her thing with all this and what she thinks I should have done and what she wants to happen. She thinks that this is all 18just no big deal just lie to her her whole life and never tell her or wait until she is over 18 and tell her. That just screams problems from then on just like her and my brother. She says she don’t know what is wrong with him but I do and I know the fact that everyone lied to him all that time and then she told him the way she did and why she did he is not happy about it. It is years later but that isn’t something that just goes away or gets better. I am not going to ruin my relationship with my kid over one lie that there is no reason to tell to start with. If it was me and I was told that I would not want a relationship with that person anymore or feel I could trust them or that they had my best interest in mind or anything else ever again. That would be one of them things for me would be a your cut off out of my life from now on from here on out no going back. I don’t care what your reason is for it or how sorry you are now. I can see Little Bitty being the same way when she is older she is to much like me and her dad and we are both the same way.

Let me just say I know that blood don’t mean anything when it comes to being a parent or not being a parent. My dad took care of my brother just as if he was his and just the same as he did me. He did not have to do that but he did he was a father not by blood but by choice. That is fine but my brother still had a right to know. If me and Father of the Year had tried to work things out and gotten back together and things worked out and he raised and took care of Little Bitty as his own that would have been fine as well. But she still would have had a right to know the truth long before she was 18 or older. Just as if I ever get with someone and we end up together from now on and if they were to become that father figure to her she will still know the truth. Because again it is her right to know and it is better to be honest with her from the be gaining than lie for years and then tell her. I am not saying in any way it is wrong for someone else to take on a child that is no their own and raise it as their own, I know a lot of guys who have and a lot of women who have and it is a great thing when they can have that bond with that child. But it is important that child knows the same truth everyone else knows not live a lie all their life and then find out. Because no matter how much that child loves that other person and that relationship between them may not change, it changes things in that child and for that child and it affects them the rest of their life. Knowing their other parent isn’t in the picture and not knowing them or only meeting them will have an effect on that child as well but that child has all their life growing up to process that and deal with that and to figure that out along with your help if need be. once they are an adult and they find this out your relationship with them has been forever changed rather they admit it to you or not and now they are dealing with that and the in formation you just dumped on them. and now they are doing it on their own. I also think that this is part of the reason my brother drank the way he did for a while there. Because it was right after he found that out he started and he was out of control for a while. Again I don’t wan that with and for my child.

{April 25, 2015}   Stupid Phone

Wednesday me and father of the year got into it because again when he was supposed to take the kids and I had plans he told them he would work. That’s when I wrote Trying Not to Be A Bitch, But

Well, my friend text me after that and we were talking. We were talking about how he doesn’t come when he is supposed to, don’t pay unless he feels like it, and how he has everyone feeling poor him.

I sent him a text saying when it all goes to court and they order him to pay support then he will have to pay wanting too or not. If he don’t they will suspend his license and he can’t have that because of work. And if he don’t pay and wants to let it get behind even after they order it then I will do it. After that if he don’t they will put him in jail and if that is how it has to be then so be it. Once he is a grand or so behind they will take his taxes every year and send me as well until he gets caught up. He thinks I’m a bitch now he hasn’t seen nothing yet.

It is all very true if he don’t want to pay for his kids then he don’t need a job to have money to blow so if they suspend his license then that is his problem. But he will either rush to pay right before they do it or rush to pay it and get them back so he don’t miss work. Either way if that is what it takes to get him to pay then that isn’t my problem. If he goes to jail he will be rushing to get out of there too and calling whoever he can to get the money and get out. If it goes that far then he will not be able to post a normal bond. Whoever bonds him out will have to pay the clerk of court cash to get him out and that cash is not returned it goes for his support he is behind. But you know if he has a job making money then he should do his part. It isn’t like he don’t have a job and not making ok money. If I made what he made I could live on it with 4 kids. I couldn’t work it very well with him here because he controlled the money and paid what he wanted when he wanted and whatever he wanted on it. So there was no getting things caught up or trying to save any.

Anyway Friday I tried to call him for a couple hours with no answer. I wanted to see if he was going to get the kids and what time he thought he would. I figured he should be about half way done with the truck. So maybe a few more hours. I wanted to know if they were having dinner here or if he was making it as well. He never answered then hours later when I called it was after 2 and he said he was cleaning the stuff to put on the truck. I ask him when he started on it. He didn’t start until about lunch time. He got off at 7 am. He should have been just about done by then. When I said something it oh I slept and I got to go to the store but I got to charge the battery in the van up so I can. Why didn’t he put the battery on to charge before he started on the truck so it would be charged when he needed to go? Because this is father of the year and this is how he thinks. I will put it on when I need it then wait forever for it. I shouldn’t have said anything and there was nothing wrong with the fact that he just started and that it would be later that night before it got done.

Then I asked him to call and pay something since he is supposed to be giving me money anyway shouldn’t be a big deal right? He says yeah I can as long as you can give me the cash back when I see you. I said um your supposed to give me money you got your check right? He says yeah I got it but I don’t know how much it was I haven’t checked yet. But I got to pay rent here and get food and do this and that this week. I said and what about here? We have rent due again before you get a check and we have bills due as well and food to buy. Oh well you just don’t understand I will see if I can give you some or not. Then he calls me back later and says he has just enough to pay rent and have $10 left is all his check was for the two weeks. I don’t believe it. He been working like crazy and first out for days on end. His check last week may have been short because he had a few slow days a couple weeks ago and the way the checks run they cut funny it takes a check or so to catch up. But I don’t believe this one is that low. He says he guess he was going to have to get a pay day loan or something. Again about not knowing what he could give me and stuff. He did pay the one thing I asked him to pay that was like $31 big deal.

Then he started on me about wanting joint custody and he didn’t want to make any kind of support deal and things because he can’t afford to pay me. That if I am just going to be nasty about it and stick it to him any time he can’t pay it. I was like what are you talking about and you can’t have them all the time you work 24/7 when you don’t have them for days at a time. He says that text you sent me you must have been trying to send someone else or thought you sent to someone else. I don’t know how it happen but my stupid phone some how got switched to him and that text went to him not the person I was trying to send it to.

But you know what like I said before it’s all true and like he was talking there the way he was talking like if he can’t just pay it when he feels like then he don’t want to pay. Then he says we haven’t even figured how much you should get or anything. I have told him over and over again we need to figure this out he has yet to come over here and do the paper work and figure it out.

I got off the phone with him and sat down printed out all the paper work and jotted all the figures down worked through the worksheet to see what he should pay. If I did everything right it says he is responsible for like 71% of their care. At that 71% and what he makes it came out to $740 a month for all three kids. He kept saying oh I won’t have to pay you that much and I’m not making that much more than when we did them before. Wrong, he is making twice that or more in some months. I took his w-2 and figured everything out by that. I started to figure it out by what ssi uses to figure what my son gets but it was only for 8 months. It showed more a month than if I did over all by 12 then take out what he pays for taxes and Medicare. I figured it give a better idea what he gets a month not leave him to short a month. But I’m the bitch you know.

I haven’t told him what he is going to have to pay yet. He called back later and still wasn’t near being done with the truck. He took a break he said. A break from I don’t know what it is tore apart and all he has to do is put it back together. He hadn’t got anything put back on hardly. I guess he needed a break from riding to the store and buying the part because it is such a big hard job to do.

I like to know when he is pretty much on call 24/7 6 to 7 days straight how he thinks he is going to get a baby sitter for the kids. He don’t have time to wait for one to get there when he gets the call. Plus I don’t know anyone that is going to get up in the middle of the night and rush over there if he did. He has no where for one to stay there and try to work something out that way. Yeah he is sharing a place with my mom but that isn’t going to work with her either. She isn’t going to be there all the time. Even if she is there and they are a sleep don’t mean she is going to let him leave them why he runs all over the state to work. Hell I couldn’t leave the two little ones in their beds sleeping why I ran less than 5 miles up the road for 10 minutes to drop my son at the bus and come right back. So him going all over all the time isn’t going to work. She says they might get up she might have to give one a bottle and diaper and tell the other to lay back down let him go to the bathroom. With them all sharing a room he will wake them up getting ready to go and the radio or tablet will wake them up when calls come in. Plus writing this I hadn’t even thought of it until now he has not where for them to stay. He don’t have but two bedrooms. He has one she has one. Girls and boys are supposed to have separate rooms and kids over a year are not supposed to share with an adult. If they are going to be with him for joint custody they are going to tell him he is going to have to have proper sleeping/living arrangements for them. There is no way he can there. That and what the therapist already knows he don’t stand a chance. He still don’t know I know the things he has said and done.

I have decided to take the kids out for a fun day a few counties over. I have made lunch and drinks packed everything and printed out all the information. I better get the kids up so they can get ready. We need to be on the road in about and hour.

et cetera
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